I DON'T OWN SOUTH PARK
(A/N: First off, lemme tell you that even though doing the cinnamon challenge sounds fun as hell, it hurts like a bitch! secondly this is a serious Sugar High fic and should be taken with a grain of salt. Thank you for reading!)
Craig glared across the classroom, icy eyes narrowed upon two blondes who were chatting it up in the back. Kenny talked animatedly to the smaller, meeker Tweek, who just nodded along. Kenny and Tweek really didn't make it elusive that they were dating; Craig couldn't go one conversation with his best friend without hearing how wonderful his boyfriend was. It was always Kenny this or Kenny that. Kenny smells this, or Kenny did that today and it made him soo happy.
Yeah, he bet that they were positively shitting out rainbows.
Craig KNEW that Kenny was never good news. The blonde was only in it for the bedroom; that was a certain. And to anyone else that wasn't Tweek, he'd be completely blunt about his intentions (In fact, he even went as far as to add the day he would take Tweek to the bedroom on his calendar). And of course, nobody had the heart to tell the sweet little blonde that he was being used like a marionette. Ignorance is bliss, they say.
But Craig had had enough.
After a month or so of persistent observation (no, it was most certainly NOT stalking). He'd figured out that Kenny would always use pet-names for his little boyfriend. Things like 'Sweetie' and 'Baby' that made Craig want to upchuck his lunch. At first, Craig had simply thought it was an endearing trait. But then he began to realize that the nicknames were ALL Kenny addressed Tweek by. And after another week and a half of spy work, sneaking about the places where they hung outside of school, (Dammit, this is NOT stalking), he'd realized that Kenny hadn't called Tweek by his actual name once. And that was the lightbulb that went off in Craig's airy brain. Kenny didn't know Tweek's name.
And the more he stal- observed the two, he realized that Kenny really didn't know anything about the blonde sans the fact that Tweek was on his 'Fuck List' (In which all the girls names in their grade were crossed off as well as half the boys). In fact, Kenny didn't know Tweek's favorite music (Dubstep), his favorite food besides coffee (French Toast), and not even the blonde's biggest pet peeve (Chewing with your mouth open), which he accentuated way more than needed.
And it was also then when Craig himself had realized how much he knew about his best friend. How much he paid attention to the blonde. How much better he'd be than that asshole Kenny.
Craig stood up, ambling over to the two blondes. He'd had enough. He sat down adjacent to Tweek, smiling bitterly at the meek blonde who twitched and yelped upon his arrival.
"Hey Craig." Tweek smiled sweetly.
"Hey." Kenny gestured with a jerk of his head that Craig should leave them alone. Craig cheerfully ignored the prompt.
"I don't want you dating him." Craig said bluntly, pointing to Kenny. Tweek reeled back in horror and shock, hand tugging on his collar.
"I know it's not normal for two boys to be dating, Craig, but you don't need to be a homophobe." Kenny said angrily, wildly gesturing for the noirette to leave.
"It has nothing to do with that." Craig replied.
"They why not!" Tweek yelped weakly, tears pricking his lovely green eyes.
"That asshole just wants in your pants, bud." Craig said, snatching up Kenny's school planner. The inside had the calendar where Kenny had marked his date with a rather unsavory sketch. He flicked to the page and held it in front of Tweek's face. "See?"
Tweek screwed his face in confusion. "Kenny has a test on Thursday?" He questioned.
Craig blinked, checking the page where Kenny had so expertly covered up the original doodle. The noirette snarled.
"If all you're gonna do is harass me and Sunshine here," Craig cringed at the use of the nickname. "Than I want you to leave."
That nickname was driving Craig crazy. But then he remembered.
"Wait." He ordered. "Kenny, if you love him soo much,"
"I do." Kenny interjected.
"Then what's his name?"
"What?" Kenny looked baffled and lost at the same time, eyebrows up. Tweek scrunched up his brow, probably contemplating the last time he'd been called by name.
"His name." Craig expounded (although why someone would need any explanation was beyond him). "What is it?"
Kenny paused, earning a glare of suspicion from Tweek. "I know it." He blubbered belligerently. "But this is trivial and stupid." He defended.
"Just say his name." Craig said boldly, letting out a bitter, humorless chuckle.
"Come on, Sunshine." Kenny coaxed, wrapping his arm around Tweek's tense shoulders. "Let's go."
"No." Tweek said steadily, growling almost. "I want you to say my name." He demanded angrily.
Kenny swallowed hard, taking in a deep breath. He shifted his eyes between Tweek and the noirette. "It's... Thomas." He said, unsure of himself.
Craig didn't think he'd ever seen Tweek as pissed as he had that day. His face was red in embarrassment and infuriation. He choked on his next words, spluttering due to the immense agitation.
"I- I- Fuck!" He screeched, gaining the brief attention of all the kids in the room, and Mr. Garrison. "You son of a bitch!" He yelled, brining his fist forward and catching Kenny straight in the eye. Craig knew from experience that it'd be a long time until Kenny's face healed.
Tweek hauled up his messenger bag and left, racing out the room into the hallways. The noirette followed him, huffing as he tailed his best friend, not bothering asking to be temporarily dismissed.
Craig followed Tweek into the restroom, hearing the loud metallic clang of a stall door shutting. Craig rested his head against the graffiti ridden stall door.
"Tweek?" He called out.
"Leave me alone!" Was the snappy reply. The noise reverberated around the room. "You got what you wanted! I'm not gonna date Kenny anymore!" Craig heard Tweek's voice crack, an endearing characteristic the blonde possessed because Puberty really just didn't work for him.
"Hey, I didn't want you to lock yourself in a toilet stall." Craig deadpanned, admittedly sounding like an uncaring asshole.
"Fuck off!" Tweek ordered, the curse word sounding odd rolling off of his tongue so seamlessly.
"Can I give you a nickname?" Craig ignored the hurt in his chest after being told to get away.
"What?" Tweek asked incredulously.
"A nickname. You know, like that one Kenny likes, 'Sunshine'." Craig explained sweetly.
"I don't want another nickname!" Tweek protested.
"I think I'll call you Chewy, like a dog." Craig joked, which was odd considering he had a completely straight face.
"No!"
"Well how about something else, like Snowflake, or Pomegranate." Craig offered, personally enjoying his choice of nicknames.
"They sounds gay as hell." Tweek laughed a little bit. Craig sighed in relief upon hearing the slightly odd chuckle.
"Howabout Chocolate, or Hazlenut?" Craig was never good with names. He'd named his guinea pig stripe because of the obvious white fur stripe on its back. He was simply rattling off names that came to mind when he thought of his little tweeker.
"Stop, Craig." Tweek laughed more, hopping off of the toilet seat and unlocking the stall. He'd calmed down enough to leave. Craig was like a mule in a stable of horses; although sort of unpleasant, helpful at keeping the horses from riling up.
Craig snatched up his cute little blonde and hummed cheerfully, despite Tweek's spluttering and protests. "How about birdie? Or maybe-"
Tweek sighed deeply, forgetting about Kenny and the nicknames wrapped up in his best friend's arms.
"How about just Tweek?"
"That works too."