The battle was going well- though the new girl did get killed by a random Axe man that appeared out of nowhere but whatever, nobody knew her anyway- and half of Gangrel's remaining army had been wiped out. Well, to call it an army would be generous; it was more of a small militia than an army. On one side Frederick, Nowi, Libra, Tharja, Kellam and Panne were taking out the mages, and Chrom, Sully, Gregor, Miriel, Sumia and Robin were mopping up the Hero's and Wyvern Riders on the other.
"Time to tip the scales!" Robin roared as he fired a bolt of Thoron at a Plegian Warrior, critically wounding him. With a battle cry his wife finished the man off, and Robin took this time to scan the battle field. He looked over just in time to see Nowi blast a man to bits, making him feel somewhat ill. With a queasy grimace he switched his gaze to Kellam, who was being healed by Libra while Tharja and Panne held the enemy off. Next he saw Gregor clashing with a Hero, who jumped back to avoid a slash and got a blast of Fire for his effort. Satisfied that the battle was going well, he tried to spot his friend and leader, Chrom. When he finally caught sight of him, the blonde tactician paled. "Oh damn it!" Chrom had just been electrocuted by Gangrel's Levin Sword; the Mad King having charged straight for the blue haired prince. As he watched Chrom fall to the ground, he felt anger well up within him. His face trembled and his lips twisted into a yell.
"CHROOOOM!" His enraged scream caught the attention of many. Ignoring others reaction he glared at Chrom's corpse, gritting his hair in frustration. "CHROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!" Jumping from his horse he ran at the body and kicked it in the head. "NAGA DAMN IT CHROM! REALLY, AGAIN?! I CAN'T LEAVE YOU ALONE FOR FIVE FUCKING MINUTES WITHOUT YOU DIEING! GRAAARGH! YOU FUCKING SUCK DUDE!" As he continued to scream at the body, everyone else began to fade away, but Robin remained, yelling at his friend's corpse. "WHY DO YOU ALWAYS DIE?! I MEAN GOD! I CAN'T TRAIN YOU BECAUSE YOU ALWAYS DIE! OH LOOK, A SOLDIER, I'M SURE CHROM CAN SORT IT- SON OF A BITCH HE DIED! WHAT A FUCKING SURPRISE! WHAT, YOU TOO WEAK FOR HARD MODE YOU DASTARD?! HOW COULD I EVER DREAM OF DOING LUNATIC IF YOU ALWAYS FUCKING DIE ON HARD?!" With one last kick- this time at the ground- he sat down and crossed his arms. "Now I've got to do all that again, I mean god damn it! This time, you're staying in the fucking back. The only reason you're on the squad is because it's mandatory! Oh well, maybe I can save that Olivia chick this time." Soon, Chrom's body and Robin vanished. The tactician turned Dark Knight opened his eyes and turned to see Chrom, in the middle of his talk with Gangrel. Once he was finished the man turned back to Robin.
"Right then, let's do it!" Robing glared at him, taking him aback.
"Fine, but this time you're staying here!"
"What?" The prince was confused by his friend's nonsensical wording.
"Fuck you that's what." He turned around and saw an approaching Olivia. "Oi, pinky!" The girl squeaked as he grabbed her by the shoulder and shoved her into Chrom's chest. "Stay with him, and try not to get either of yourselves killed this time." Robin turned around and mounted his horse, leaving two very confused people behind him.
This time, Robin and Sumia charged straight for Gangrel, decimating everyone in their path as the badass couple they were, with the others mopping up the remnants, while Chrom and Olivia did nothing. They did talk a lot though, and the next time Robin saw his friend he was engaged. If Robin thought it odd, then he didn't comment (though truthfully he was a bit annoyed, knowing that Lucina was going to suck now).
I hate Chrom in Hard mode. He always fucking dies. Anyway, recognise the reference in this one shot? If you do then...good one I guess