AN: This here is a one-shot for the Facebook page 'The Three Marauders' fanfiction competition. 2000 word limit, I decided to give it a go! Enjoy! ~TheOnlyQuirk
Managing Mischief
"James, there is something wrong with Sirius."
"There is always something wrong with Sirius." He replied as he entered Gryffindor common room, flinging his bag into an empty chair and jumping onto the worn sofa, which gave a small squeak of discontent. Remus folded his arms, and sent the youngest Black a concerned look.
"He's not telling me something."
"Oh send me to Azkaban!" Sirius said dramatically, throwing his hands in the air, causing Peter, who was sitting next to him, to drop his roll of parchment. "I've told you, there isn't anything to tell!"
Remus rolled his eyes. "Yes there is! You're hiding something, I know it."
"What makes you think that?"
"You've been unusually quiet, and you didn't even insult Evans when she left the common room." Remus pointed out. James, at the mere mention of his unrequited love, sat up a little straighter and looked around as if she could appear at any moment.
"And you gave me the last biscuit." Peter piped up.
"What is so suspicious about being nice?!" Sirius exclaimed, and James chuckled quietly.
"The fact that it's you."
"How offensive. I revoke everything nice I've done today."
"So about two things then." Remus said, and Sirius leant back against the seat with a wounded look.
"Where have you been anyway Prongs?" Lupin asked, and James' air of arrogance quickly turned to one of guilt.
"You went looking for Lily again didn't you? You do realise that if you pull a stunt like last time again, she'll follow through with her promise?"
"You would think most girls would like being sung to in the Great Hall. I thought it was romantic." James argued.
"Lily isn't most girls."
James gave a long sigh. "Don't I know it."
"Although," said Sirius, snapping out of his mood and leaning forwards with a grin, "I think you'd suit pink rabbit ears. I might ask her to do it anyway."
"Knowing her, she'd probably give you a blue set to match."
Peter giggled in his corner, and the clock on the far wall chimed 6, causing Sirius to look up quickly, a slow smile spreading across him troublesome face. Remus, who noticed the change immediately, narrowed his eyes.
"Prongs…fancy a walk with your favourite marauder?" Sirius said.
"I just went on a walk with them actually. It was a bit lonely, but I managed."
"James, whatever Padfoot suggests, I would advise you do the opposite." Remus warned, and Sirius scoffed.
"Moony has no sense of fun when he's on his cycle."
"And you have no sense whatsoever. Besides, you know it's not my time of the month yet."
A couple of first year girls who were walking past, overheard Lupin's last comment and gave him a disturbed glance before dissolving into giggles.
"Come on, I promise it'll be worth your while." Sirius said, standing up and motioning James to do the same.
"Alright fine. But only because I'm curious to why you're being so persistent."
"He's always persistent." Peter pointed out, and Remus gave a grim sort of smile.
"Unfortunately so." He said, and stood up to follow them.
"Ah, Remus, I think you should stay here-"
"-And that is exactly why I am coming" He replied firmly, and Sirius shrugged, bouncing out the portrait hall with an energy that rivalled a chocolate frog. James followed with a cautious Remus at his heels, Peter putting down his things hastily in order to join in with the latest adventure.
It was a relatively warm spring evening, the sun only just beginning to dip lazily in the pastel sky. Students were still dotted around on the grass outside, revision and timetables lay forgotten at their side. Peter muttered something worriedly about exams as they exited the castle and began making their way over to the black lake, it's murky waters still and silent.
"Don't you start worrying Wormtail, exams are ages away." James said.
"They're in 5 weeks." Said Remus.
"Exactly. Ages away."
"I'm sure I don't know nearly enough about potions as I should do…" Peter mumbled as they walked around the small wooden jetty to reach the edge of the lake. Sirius sat on a small bench, casually glancing around as if admiring the view. James joined him, but the other two remained standing, Remus folding his arms once more.
"Okay, what are you up to Padfoot."
"It's almost like you don't trust me Moony."
"There's no almost about it."
"You know, that really hurts. If you get woken up in the middle of the night by broken, heart-wrenching sobs, you'll know that only you have caused this pain." Sirius said.
"Sobbing aside," interjected James. "Why are we here?"
"Maybe Padfoot fancied a swim!" said Peter excitedly, thrilled to have thought of such a witty comment to contribute to the conversation.
"Or maybe, he is giving Prongs another opportunity." Sirius added, which only caused Remus to groan.
"Sirius…"
But he broke off when the amiable chatter of a couple of girls floated over to them, gradually increasing in volume. James, who instantly recognised one particular voice, sat up straight, ran one hand through his permanently messy hair, and shot Sirius a grin.
Lily Evans and her friend Melissa Crane rounded the corner and came into sight of the Marauders as James gave an audible sigh. Lily's sheet of auburn hair was swept back into a ponytail, and she laughed musically at something Melissa had said, not quite yet registering that they had unexpected company. When she had however, it was evident by the twisted scowl and furious march that reminded James of a thunder storm.
"Potter." She spat.
"Evans." James replied sweetly, leaning back against the bench. Melissa caught up and gave Sirius a wave, who winked back in return.
"Did you know about this?" Lily said, whirling to face the dark haired girl who held her hands up in mock surrender.
"Not at all," she replied, used to the muggleborn's quick temper flares. "Sirius is in my herbology class. I'm only saying hello like the polite human being I am."
"Maybe it's fate." James said wistfully, and Lily turned back to face him. Peter eyed the furious girl warily, and took a step back.
"What are you even doing here?" She growled.
"We're on a pleasant evening walk, just as you two here are obviously doing." Sirius said, and Lily narrowed her eyes.
"Actually, we're here to practise our gravity spells for the charms exam."
"Oh really? I had no idea." He said, with an innocence that suggested that he had a very exact idea indeed.
"May I practise with you?" James asked politely.
"No."
"Why not?"
"Because you're extremely distracting!" She exclaimed, only to have Sirius nod in agreement.
"It's true Prongs. You're so devilishly handsome it puts me right off my schoolwork. It's a surprise we're not related to be honest."
"I didn't mean that." Lily stumbled, a pink tinge entering her freckled cheeks, causing James to smile.
"Are you sure? Because Sirius is right. I'm extremely handsome."
"More like extremely arrogant."
James stood up and stretched, his tall frame a good couple of inches taller than Lily's – not that it bothered her. She placed her hands on her hips and looked up at him with the same seething look that she always did as he sauntered over towards her, smiling slightly.
"If I wasn't as arrogant, this wouldn't be as fun would it Evans?" He said softly.
"You're calling this fun?"
"It's fun to watch!" Called out Sirius, earning a sharp prod of the elbow from Remus. Lily pulled out her wand and poked James in the chest with it.
"Careful Lily, as much as I know you want to skewer him alive and feed him to the giant squid, I'm sure you want to finish your end of year exams before going to Azkaban." Melissa said casually, and Remus chuckled despite himself.
"Plus the giant squid probably wouldn't want him. I doubt he tastes nice." Added Sirius. James turned slightly to face him, looking affronted.
"I'll have you know I probably taste very good indeed."
"You better hope I don't take that as a challenge Potter." Lily warned.
James looked back and gave the red head a wink. "You can taste me any time you like Evans."
"I was talking about the squid."
Sirius stood up and linked arms with the amused Melissa, gesturing for Remus and Peter also. "Well I think we better let these two lovebirds sort out their own domestics, don't you? Tell you what, we'll divert to the kitchens on the way back, get some pumpkin juice while we're at it." He said, beginning to steer the Gryffindors away from the lake.
"No way, I'm here for damage control." Remus said, earning him a glare from Lily.
"I can look after myself." She snapped.
"It's not you who I'm afraid for." He stated.
"Come Moony, James is a big boy, I'm sure Evans will keep him in one piece for now." Sirius soothed, and began to walk back towards the castle, Remus reluctantly following.
"I wouldn't be so sure about that." Lily muttered under her breath.
"What's my percentage for survival?"
"It decreases by 5 percent every time you speak."
"Does singing count?"
It was dusk by the time James Potter returned to the common room once more, all three remaining marauders having just finished off their evening butterbeer. The fire was flickering gently, casting shadows on the russet walls. Sirius leapt to his feet as soon as James entered, a smile as wide as the Cheshire cat's when he spotted the dazed looking grin on Potter's face.
"I take it things went well?" he asked smugly.
"Well he's still in one piece." Said Peter, placing his goblet on the small table in front of him.
"Perhaps." James replied in a dreamy type of voice, falling back against the cushions. Remus checked his temperature and the whites of his eyes, only to shrug his shoulders. "He hasn't been hexed as far as I can tell." He said.
"What happened?" Sirius urged.
"I kissed Lily Evans." James said, practically glowing.
"You did not." Snorted Peter in unbelief.
"I did!"
"I always knew I was the perfect matchmaker…" Sirius boasted, perching on the arm of the tired sofa.
"Wait, wait wait…when you kissed Lily…what did she do?" Remus questioned. James placed his hand to his cheek tenderly.
"She slapped me."
Sirius erupted in hysterics, Peter following shortly after and even Remus quirked a sympathetic smile. Now that he had said, a faint red handprint could be seen imprinted on James' left cheek.
"What did she say afterwards? I'm surprised she didn't hex you for good measure, and then I would have been left to manage the result your mischief." Lupin said.
"So was I." Prongs replied. "I think she was too embarrassed to harm me further. She spewed out her usual barrage of insults of course…"
"Idiot?"
"Toe-rag?"
"Arrogant?"
"Filth?"
"Flobberworm?"
"Spawn of the devil?" alternated the boys, as they listed off Lily's most commonly heard names for James Potter. He nodded, and continued.
"Pretty much. She finished by shouting at me to stop stalking her, and turning up wherever I'm not wanted."
"What does she think we have, some sort of tracking device, so we can see where she is at all times? All I did was overhear her conversation about practising charms down by the lake." Sirius said.
James lifted his head quickly, an expression forming that the others knew all too well.
"What hair-brained idea have you come up with now?" Remus asked.
"Sirius, you are a genius."
"I know I am."
"What is it?" asked a confused Peter.
James smiled.
"We're going to need a parchment. Does anyone here have any experience with maps?"