Warnings: Yaoi, AU, HidaIta, non-graphic sex, what could interpreted as voyeurism, swearing, angst, possible OOC, and touchy subjects. (i.e. Divorce) I think that's it.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.
I put a lot of emotion into this one. It should be mentioned that I accidentally borrowed a theme from the book "The Lone Ranger and Tonto Fistfight in Heaven" by Sherman Alexie. I didn't realize it until after I wrote it, and I used it a completely different way.
If anyone want's to know which part, ask.
Enjoy.
Everything in Hidan's life had always been loud, ever since his mother screamed as he tore out of her loins, ever since he had cried to fill his lungs with air.
When he strained his mind and thought back as far as he could he remembered his parents, his fathers long silver ponytail and his mother's fly-away red curls, their voices loud, shrieking. They were always screaming at each other, hissing and yowling like cats, fighting viciously, loudly.
Sometimes Hidan thought that they had been fighting since the beginning of time, that perhaps the big bang had been the start of their fight. Other times he thought that maybe he had been the catalyst of their fury, but he didn't know. They never spoke to him of their life before, they were always to busy yelling.
At night they were also loud, but they didn't fight, the noises were not the shouts and shrieks of a fight, but instead the moans and cries of passion. When Hidan got a bit older and the "Inside voice" world began to clue him into what was and wasn't "normal" he would sometimes stay up and listen to his parent's passion.
It never felt perverted to him, it felt fair, he listened them fight, he listened to them make love. No matter what the quiet world said, he knew they were in love, even for all their fighting.
On nights when they went to bed silently Hidan wouldn't be able to sleep without his twisted lullaby and he would want to scratch at his ears to make the silence stop.
Hidan met Itachi in 9th grade, and wasn't sure what to think of him. The Uchiha was attractive and intelligent, sure, but he was quiet. Very very quiet. Hidan didn't like that.
He still ended up hanging out with Itachi at lunch. They would talk frequently (Well, Hidan talked and Itachi listened), but neither ever went to each other's house.
Hidan thought about it, but was increasingly unsure about letting the hushed tones of the outside world into his earsplitting life, and he didn't want to force his way into Itachi's doubtlessly silent serenity.
Purity was something that Hidan valued, the purity of his parent's relentless fighting and fucking, and Itachi's different purity, his purity that Hidan was aware of but didn't understand.
He needed his noise just as much as Itachi needed his silence.
"You should come over to my house tonight."
Hidan blinked, almost as surprised by Itachi's voice as he was by the actual words.
"Fuck man, I almost forgot what your voice sounded like man."
"…"
"You seriously want me to man?"
"You've never been to my house before. In two years you've never even seen my house."
"I know."
There was a short silence that Hidan of course broke first.
"…What's your address man?"
Itachi silently began to write it down for the silver-haired man.
Itachi's house was just as Hidan had imagined it, big and quiet.
"Damn 'Tachi, this place is a fucking mansion!" exclaimed Hidan, not liking the way his voice resonated.
Itachi shrugged silently and led Hidan up to his room.
This is wrong! Screamed Hidan's mind. It was wrong. He felt like he was raping Itachi's quiet privacy with his loud intrusion, ruining the foreign purity of Itachi's whispering world.
Itachi's room was also big and quiet, and Hidan felt like an intruder.
The dark haired Uchiha sat on a chair in front of his desk and Hidan, seeing that there was no other chair, awkwardly sat on the edge of Itachi's large bed.
An awkward near-silence, broken only by Hidan's foot nervously tapping on the floor, filled the room.
I knew I shouldn't have come here, fuckfuckfuckfu-
"Well?"
"Well what?"
Itachi wasn't looking at Hidan. "Aren't you going to talk?"
"…"
"…Talk." A command.
Silence. Tap tap tap tap tap.
All of a sudden Itachi turned, pressed a button on his computer and waited as the screen slowly came to life. He started clicking, but Hidan couldn't quite see what he was doing. Then the room was suddenly filled with grungy rock music. Itachi turned back to Hidan.
"Better?"
"…Yeah."
Apparently Itachi wanted his purity tainted.
It was the only logical reason, why else would he keep inviting over Hidan. Perhaps the man was a spiritual masochist. Hidan was a physical masochist, yet he didn't understand Itachi's apparent need to corrupt his quiet home with Hidan's screaming presence.
Still, he never turned down an invitation, he let Itachi play the music, Hidan spoke and Itachi listened. Every week, for two months, this went on.
Hidan grew used to it. The silence was gone. Hidan liked that. He couldn't stand silence.
"Do you want to spend the night?" Itachi asked on the first weekly visit on the third month. Hidan pretended he hadn't heard the question.
The next visit Itachi asked again. Hidan once again ignored him.
The third time Itachi stopped Hidan before he could leave and demanded this time; "Spend the night."
"I can't."
"Why not?"
Hidan wasn't sure. "I just can't."
"That's not an answer."
"I can't fall asleep at other people's house." It wasn't a complete lie; Hidan had never slept over at someone's house before.
Itachi was still blocking his path. "I think you could."
"Fuck man, seriously, I can't-"
"Stop getting defensive."
Hidan once again fell silent, except for his foot once again tapping nervously against the floor.
Tap tap tap tap tap.
Itachi spoke once again. "I think you could."
"No."
"I could help you."
"…No."
Hidan tried to push past the slightly shorter man, but was quickly stopped by arms wrapping around his waist and an unfamiliar pressure on his lips.
"Itachi pulled back. "…I could help you."
Slowly their lips met again.
The weekly visits turned into weekly overnights, Itachi helping Hidan sleep with their own twisted lullaby.
Sometimes though Hidan wondered if it was not Itachi helping Hidan, but the other way around, as he sang his lullaby and Itachi listened. Of course he never mentioned this during the day, in fact their nights were never mentioned during the day. They were kept separate, the differences between shouts and lullabies.
Hidan wondered if this separation was a trait of the quiet world. Just another rule of silence, a quiet cage.
Strangely, he didn't think it was.
Two months they had been having "sleepovers".
Two months and Itachi was still silent.
Two months and Hidan still hated silence. He still hated the burning quiet. In fact his hatred had grown.
Night after night his parents were silent. During the day their fights were quieter.
The silence echoed in his ears and gave him headaches at night, keeping him up. Soon he could only sleep well with Itachi.
But Itachi was quiet also. Even during their nights together Itachi stayed silent, save the quiet gasps and pants of pleasure.
The whispering world was closing in on him.
Finally one day Hidan woke from his fitful sleep to silence. He got up quickly as if hoping that if he moved fast enough the silence wouldn't get him. He got dressed quickly, foregoing brushing his teeth to save time.
But before he could escape out the door the quiet caught him.
"Hidan?" It was his mother's voice, though he barely recognized it when she wasn't screaming. ""Hidan honey?" Your father and I want to talk to you."
Hidan didn't say anything.
His parents said he could stay home from school that day, but Hidan refused to. He didn't want to stay in that house with them.
The traitors. The cowards. The quitters. How dare they give into the world of silence, the world where a couple could just get divorced and never speak to each other again.
Traitors.
They had become part of the silence, the silence that was eating Hidan alive.
"Are you alright Hidan?" Itachi asked as the silver-haired man stormed over to their usual lunch table, the chair he pulled out to sit in shrieking loudly, angrily protesting the way it's metal legs were dragged across the tile floor.
Hidan glared at Itachi. Itachi was so... quiet. He was so fucking quiet!
"I'm fine, fucking fine! Absolutely fucking dandy!" snapped Hidan, angrily attacking his lunch, mauling his meal as he ate it.
Itachi made an odd face, but he seemed to resign himself accept the other boy's answer.
"Hey..." the black haired man said slowly. "Can you come over today?"
Hidan stopped eating and looked over at Itachi. He then turned back to his lunch.
"I can't come over today man. Sorry."
Itachi said nothing. Neither did Hidan.
Hidan laid quietly on the couch of his now silent house, the TV on.
He felt sick. He hadn't visited Itachi in a week. His house had been painfully silent the whole time. His father was now living in some some apartment across town. His mother was quiet. Hidan had stopped eating.
The silence was choking him.
Hidan was eating again, but he still wasn't visiting Itachi.
10 days. 10 days since he had last visited Itachi. 4 days since he had last talked to Itachi. Itachi was just too quiet. It drove Hidan crazy.
Yet, he missed Itachi. He tried to tell himself he just missed the sex, but it wasn't true.
"Why are you avoiding me?"
Hidan breifly glanced at Itachi in the school's bathroom mirror, but said nothing, simply continuing to wash his hands.
Itachi persisted. "Why are you avoiding me?!" Louder this time.
"I don't know what you're talking about," Hidan said cooly, not looking at the Uchiha.
"Don't fuck with me Hidan," growled Itachi, his voice low again. "Don't act all innocent. It's beneath you and you know it."
"...fuck you."
"What was that?"
"FUCK YOU!"
Hidan's vision blurred as he mentally snapped. He couldn't take this anymore, no more no more no more no more.
"I fucking hate people like you! All my fucking life, ALL MY LIFE! Now my parent's too! Fuck you Itachi! I hate you! I hate you so much, you bastard! I never liked you, you fucker! Fuck you! I hate everything about you! I hate your face and your eyes and your Jashin-damned SILENCE! Fuck you Itachi, just FUCK YOU!"
With that Hidan turned and ran out of the bathroom, accidentally slamming the door into the face of a blond who had doubtlessly came to investigate the screaming.
Hidan ignored him, he ignored Itachi, he just turned and rushed out of school, running from the silence that was chasing him.
A loud knock rang out on the door of Hidan's house, breaking the boy out of his TV induced stupor. He shut off the small box and got up to answer the door. Quickly he regretted it.
"We need to talk," Itachi gasped, apparently having been running.
"How the hell do you know where I live?" Hidan tried to snap angrily. Something about Itachi, there, at his little rundown soulless house... It made him feel strange.
"Phonebook," gasped Itachi, leaning against the doorframe. "We need to talk Hidan."
"No, we don't."
"You need to talk."
Hidan faltered and Itachi took this opportunity to press his lips to Hidan's. After a few seconds he pulled back and wrapped his arms around Hidan. "You can talk to me."
Hidan slowly pulled Itachi in and closed the door.
Itachi spoke again. "You can talk to me."
"Why are you here?" mumbled Hidan. "You should at least be yelling yelling at me... You should at least hate me..."
"You need to talk," Itachi repeated. He looked up at Hidan, and they're eyes met.
"...I could help you."
Hidan's breath hitched. So that's it...
"...Thank you," he said, his eyes not leaving Itachi's, hoping that Itachi could hear him, just like he could hear Itachi.
Itachi smiled. Hidan had never seen Itachi smile before.
Hidan smiled back. It felt like it had been a long time since he had last smiled.
Neither spoke.
I think I understand now Itachi... About the quiet...
I love you.
I love you too.
Neither was silent.
The End.
Some fun facts about this story:
My mom read this. She found it in my room and read it. When she told me she had read it I got really freaked out, but she said she liked it so...
I'm beginning to really like HidaIta/ItaHida. I'm a sucker for Hidan pairings.
This started out as a simple Hidan-centric drabble when I was thinking about what kind of a household would (AU) Hidan grow up in. I decided that it would be the type of household where everyone's always fighting, so the only way you get paid any attention to you is when your louder than everyone else. Somehow it just morped into this.
I might make a sequel to this, because there was some stuff I wanted to include but I didn't get to.
...I think that's it.
Review, don't flame, constructive critism would be greatly appreciated.