Title: At The End of The Day
Spoilers: Minor Cyberwoman spoilers, which there always seems to be.
Prompt: Jack/Ianto argument
Copyright: I do not own Torchwood, Captain Jack Harkness or Ianto Jones, if I did it'd be a fluffy explosion.
"Jaaack" Ianto groaned, as the Captain knocked over his bedside lamp from the nightstand, whilst he was attempting to pull on his right shoe. He was never good at balancing on his left foot, even when he was a child he always fell over. "It's 2am, if you're going to leave do it quietly"
"Sorry" Jack whispered, cursing loudly as he tripped over his own feet, falling backwards onto the floor with a rather loud thud, the floor vibrating across the apartment.
"Right that's it, I'm awake. Are you happy now?" Ianto snapped, sitting up in bed to glare down at his older lover, who was sat in a heap on the floor.
"I was trying to be quiet you know" Jack grumbled, standing up and dusting himself off. Not that there would be anything on the Captain from falling on the floor, Ianto's apartment was so clean that your dinner could be eaten off any surface in the place. There was not a dust bunny, spider web or stain anywhere to be seen. Just how Ianto liked it.
"You never are Jack, you never stay the night, and wake me up every single time you 'try to be quiet' when you leave" Ianto sighed in frustration, throwing his hands up in the air for dramatic emphasis. He had never had this conversation with the Captain before, and he definitely did not want to have it again, and so he was trying to make his point as clear as possible.
"Look I'm sorry, I'll try to be quieter next time"
"Who is to say there will be a next time Jack?" Ianto asked, narrowing his eyes at the Captain and folding his arms across his chest. Jack was a bit too sure of himself, not thinking twice about whether or not there would be a next time. He had just assumed that there would be, never thinking about Ianto or his feelings.
Jack did not understand what his leaving after their sexual acts was doing to the Welshman. At times he would lay awake for hours hating himself for sleeping with his boss. That wasn't something that should happen within the work place, employees and bosses should not get involved, it could cause a whole array of problems.
Other nights he would feel disgusted, cheap and nasty and have to shower and scrub himself down until his skin was red raw. He felt as if he was using Jack as a way to get higher up in the Torchwood Institute, even if he wasn't directly doing it, he was worried he was doing it subconsciously.
On nights that they had cuddled for a little while afterwards, Ianto felt sad. He hadn't had a proper relationship with anyone since Lisa. He needed the feel of another human being next to him at night, to make him feel safe, protected, and even loved. But that was absent. The closest thing he had to a relationship was sex with Jack when the Captain asked him. Well, when the Captain demanded it.
"I'm bloody sick of all this Jack!" Ianto snapped, grabbing his pyjama trousers from the floor and pulling them roughly on, covering up part of his naked body. "You use me, and then throw me away" he shouted at the Captain, standing up from the bed so he was on the opposite side to Jack.
"If I made you feel that way then I'm sorry, but I-"
"Aha, there it is" Ianto laughed a humourless laugh, "The almighty 'but', there always is one when you're concerned, isn't there Jack?"
Ianto had never spoken to Jack this way before. He had never spoken to anyone like this before, but now he was on a roll. He couldn't stop now, not with the rush of adrenaline inside of him, coursing through his veins, his heart beating faster and his lungs swelling with the oxygen he was breathing in at a faster rate than normal.
"Not this time. No, Jack. This stops now. I am sick of this being a completely one sided arrangement. Do you ever ask me if I want to partake in this? Do you ever ask me how I like it? Do you ever wonder how it makes me feel when you get up and leave, right after we've done something like that? No Jack, you don't. Because you're selfish. You're a selfish, selfish man, Jack, and I'm sick of it all!" As Ianto was screaming his speech to Jack, his eyes were beginning to fill with tears he hoped would not shed. He refused to let the Captain see him so weak and vulnerable.
"Ianto I-"
"Get out" Ianto muttered, pointing to the door, "Get out now Jack now!"
Not needing to be told again, Jack grabbed his coat from the floor and exited Ianto's apartment, closing the door on his way out. He didn't leave the complex though, just sat outside in the corridor in the hopes that Ianto would forgive him soon, or he would at least talk to him.
Ianto went back to bed, but not to sleep. He just lay there, alone in his queen sized bed, staring up at the ceiling, wondering exactly what had just happened, and why he had snapped so suddenly. He hadn't meant to snap at Jack like that. As he reflected on the events that had just occurred, he wondered exactly what had happened inside of him to explode in that way. He briefly wondered if he should run after the Captain, apologise and drag him to bed to give him what he knew he wanted, allowing him to leave afterwards. But he knew be couldn't do that now, not after what he had said. Either Jack changed, or whatever kind of relationship they had was over. Ianto would no longer be used, and then tossed away.
Jack, in his time alone with his thoughts, realised that everything Ianto had screamed at him was true. He never did ask if the Welshman wanted to do any of this, he never asked how he liked it and he had definitely never asked what Ianto thought about him always leaving after sex.
Maybe if Jack had explained his reasons to Ianto, he would understand? But he knew that wasn't true. Just because he had been hurt in previous relationships, doesn't mean Ianto would be in any way the same. He knew for a fact that the Welshman was not the same, and to think that he believed he could be made the Captain feel sick. Had he lost all his trust in human beings? Had all these years living and wondering alone cause him to believe that all humans were the same; selfish and unreliable? Jack knew that he himself had become exactly what he believed humans to be, he was now selfish and unreliable.
He knew that because of his attitude he was losing Ianto as not only a lover, buy as also a friend. The Captain had to make a choice, he either changed his ways for the man he knew one day he could, if not already, love, or he ended it all now, and continued being just the way his is.
Standing up from his place in the corridor, Jack wiping off the dirt from his trousers, the hallway carpet being no where near as clean as Ianto's apartment had been, the Captain sighed. Would Ianto allow him back in after the way he had acted? He wondered, as the retrieved the key to the Welshman's apartment from his pocket, and slid it into the lock. Hearing the familiar click, he pushed open the door, relieved to see that the chain had not been put on so the Captain couldn't enter.
Across the room was Ianto's bed, his open plan apartment meant that the living room, bedroom and kitchen were all connected, the bathroom being the only singular room. Removing his shoes quietly by the doorway, so as he didn't disrupt his sleeping lover, which he had hoped they still were, Jack spotted Ianto's sleeping form. He could tell the Welshman was sleeping, because his soft snores were carried through the silent room. Jack frowned when he realised he didn't even know Ianto snored. How little he actually did know about Ianto Jones.
That was going to change, Jack vowed as he slid his greatcoat off and placed it over the arm of Ianto's sofa, his braces and shirt following on top. He decided it best if he left his trousers on, it would be bad enough in the morning for Ianto to wake up with another human in his bed, without adding them being naked into the mix.
When he reached the bed, walking as quietly as possible, he sighed, gazing upon the sleeping form of Ianto Jones. Was this what he had been missing all along? His lover looking so vulnerable and innocent, only half his body inside of the duvet, hugging the pillow with one arm.
When Jack slid into the bed, the left side was his side, Ianto mumbled something incoherent in his sleep as the bed dipped slightly. As Jack settled in the covers, this whole experience being very alien to him, his sleeping lover rolled over and rested his head into the crook of Jack's neck. As Jack wrapped an arm around Ianto's shoulder he realised this definitely wasn't as bad he had originally made it out to be.
When Ianto Jones awoke he was being spooned, a familiar scent encircling him, his body warm and filled with goosebumps from the touch of another human being, skin on skin, something that waking up in the morning to, had not happened for longer than Ianto could remember. He was not angry at Jack for ignoring his command to leave. No, he was happy that Jack had listened to him, and hoped that he now understood why the Welshman was so upset.
"Morning" Jack smiled, leaning down to place a small kiss on Ianto's lips "I'm sor-"
"Don't apologise, let's just stay like this" Ianto sighed in content, nuzzling himself further back into the Captain, who was placing light kisses across his shoulder, "This is perfect"
fin