I don't own Minecraft or 1000 Ways to Die. That belongs to Notch and Spike, respectively. Well, Notch , Mojang, Notch's partners, and affiliate companies for Minecraft.
Now with the disclaimer over, let's get down to business. This is clearly a parody or tribute or whatever of 1000 Ways to Die. I like the show, and I personally suggest you watch it. However, it does have its moments of blood and gore, however fake it is. They're based on real stories, mind you.
All of these accounts have happened to me, will happen to me, or never happened to me. So have fun reading about my potential demises. Let's start off with one of the first ways to die you could possibly think of in Minecraft.
Way to Die #24: Starving Steve
Notch, please! My stomach, it feels like it's digesting itself. I've gone days without food since I landed on this dreadful island, and I fear my end will come soon. I"m too weak to fend for myself, and I'm sure even tripping would spell doom for me.
I ate my last steak several days ago. Grass seems pretty delicious, but as luck would have it, I've wandered into the desert. It must have been during one of my "drunken" hazes. I"m drunk off sheer hunger. My best guess would be that my body wants me to feel good as I die.
My body isn't helpful.
The moon is starting to rise. Every night, limping from monsters really takes a toll on me. I know one of these nights I won't wake up. All I hope is that I die in my slee-
"And as you can see," the doctor said," this body suffered from exposure, dehydration, and starvation. His muscles atrophied. The subject must have been in considerable pain at the time of death. His organ tissues were completely desiccated, so we can see all the damage he took as the body is perfectly preserved in this desert."
He continued. "His stomach had actually shrunken. Overall, he died from lack of water or food. A truly painful and slow way to die."
I know it's short. They're like mini-fics. I forget the name. Drabbles? That doesn't apply here, I think...
Oh well. R&R with my stories. Read and review. You've done the first, do the second please. Then do it with my other ones if you have time and interest. Until then...
-Hunter