I am alone in this world.
I am encased in a world of darkness. My eyes are sightless, my ears broken. It feels as if I shouldn't exist. All I know is the scents and taste of the forest, the cats that surround me.
Nothing has ever been clear to me. The nudges others give me are all I have to guide myself, as well as scents of their fur, the curve of claws or brush of a tail. I know that we, myself and the others, live together. I sleep in an area, far from most of them, with a wall of lush leaves to guard me. No one else bothers me there.
I have never known my name. All I have ever known is the darkness and silence that the world has given me. There is a tiny voice inside my head, a whisper, that tells me things I can't figure out, sometimes right, sometimes wrong. I don't know what the others call me. I must have some name to them, a name I will never know. To me, my name is Wish.
I don't know why I chose that name for myself. Maybe it was because of my constant wishing for my sight or hearing to come, as if it had only been lost and then found. Maybe it is because I wished to meet the others; to truly see my littermates. Whatever it was, the voice told me that Wish was my name.
These cats around me are peculiar. Each have a unique scent that sets them apart. Their real names will always be a mystery to me, but the voice in my head has created names for me to remember them as. The milkgiver is called Flower, because of her sweet scent and encouraging gestures. My mind carved out a mental image of her; a long body with strong muscles and bright eyes.
There is another, a tom, with an aura of power around him. Other cats seem very reliant on him. I call him Flame. I can just imagine his strong claws that kill the prey for us to eat. The voice in my head says that other cats hunt too, helping to feed us, but Flame seems to be above them all.
I decided to name the voice in the back of my head Hope, because that is what it is. It is a piece of hope, the only way I can survive in this place. Hope tells me where to go, who to follow, to navigate my home. Even though the other cats help, I can't hear them like I can hear Hope.
The forest outside still taunts me. I have never been allowed to leave the camp and dens where we sleep. The others probably think that I can't be trusted out there, in harms way. I'm most likely just another piece of dead weight. A hungry mouth that can't feed herself. I can barely tell where others are, but finding and killing prey would be impossible.
Hope tells me that the other cats my age are training out in the forest. I would be jealous, if I was even able to navigate the forest without scaring off all the prey. Maybe one day I will be able to be like them, moving through the bushes and trees with ease. It would take lots of work, to see the forest with only my powers of scent and touch. One day, I hope to.
Something shook me from my thoughts, the rough prodding of a paw against my pelt. opening my mouth, I breathed deeply, the sharp tang of the cats fur washing over my tongue. This was a cat Hope and I had named Fang, mostly for his strong, sharp fangs and claws that had pricked me on multiple occasions. In my mind, Hope helped me to etch out an outline of him.
In my head, he is tall and grizzled, fur long and sticking up in places. His eyes have dulled with the anger and fierceness of past years. He would be a great cat in my opinion if he wasn't so violent.
I stand on my shaking paws, guided out of my den by his tail that flickers on my head and whiskers to make sure I am moving in the right direction. Now that I am in the open, scents of the other cats barrage me from all sides. Some have a sweet, tangy scent, while others smell like dirt. There are a few that have tried to be nice to me, but they will never know me. I am just in my own bubble of darkness that surrounds me.
` Fang continues, twisting through the tunnels of ferns and bushes that make up our camp. There, in the center, is the fresh-kill pile. Several types of prey lay there, some stale by a few hours, others brought in by others recently. I reach down to grab a piece of prey, the scents filling my mouth almost unbearably close, but I am pulled back.
I hiss at Fang, who backs off slightly in shock.
Why would he stop me from eating? I think, but Hope comes in.
(A/N To make things easy, Wish's thoughts are in italics and Hope's replies are in bold.)
It must be something important, Hope replies. Fang might have brought you here for something else. Something besides fresh-kill.
I try to push Hope into the back of my head to focus on the camp around me. Flame approaches, his presence making everyone still. I imagine them all shrinking back, hiding from his commanding presence. I stay completely still, not aware of where I am compared to the cats and walls around me. But he is approaching me.
I feel his pelt brush mine, and I flinch back. What could they want with me?
Be calm, whispers Hope. I straighten my back, trying to sit tall and brave.
Suddenly, Flame is gone, and all the other cats are gathering. My nose is confused with the scents of all the cats, at least twenty of them, so close. It is almost suffocating, the heat of their pelts burning my body and forcing its way into my stomach. I feel that I might vomit.
The cats still, their attention most likely on Flame. He has now climbed onto the rock, above us. I recall one time, when I was very young, scrambling up there, then falling. The rough rocks below left scars that still burn on my pelt. He is so confident, completely calm by his scents. I have learned to rely solely on my sense of smell to find emotions and position, and have become pretty good.
I sense the slight vibrations in the rocky ground as one cat, one I recognize from my early kit days with Flower, join Flame on the rock. He is nervous, but excited at the same time.
What is going to happen? I wonder.
Remember him from before? counters Hope.
Yes. Dusk, isn't it?
Yes. Dusk and his littermates were only a few moons younger than you. They are now old enough to train, so they are receiving that permission.
Normally, I don't question Hope. She is usually right when explaining the world unseen from me. There is no one else who I can here, so I need to trust her, no matter what. Will I ever get to go up there and be able to train?
Before Hope can even answer, something shoves into me. I stumble forward, the pads on my paws scraping against rock. Again, I am struck in the side, and decide that it is no use fighting. I may as well walk the best I can to avoid being even a worst mistake to the others. There is a gentle slope, leading me up until I can smell Flame's pelt beside me. I sit, trying to stay as straight as possible.
Flame's hot breath ruffles my fur slightly. I assume that he is speaking to the other cats, maybe about me. For what seems like forever, his breath falls onto my pelt. The word he speaks are hollow to me. I can't hear them, but Hope does try to explain in my mind.
This is it, Wish, she whispers. They are letting you train.
How would you know? I ask. You are a part of me, and I can't hear.
I have ways. Your ears may be broken, but they are still there. Maybe there is a secret inside you that you never know.
I ponder this for a moment. A secret inside of me seems unlikely. All I know is myself and the scents of the others and our camp. I would think that every part of me had been revealed by now. But maybe there is a possibility that there is more than me then I will ever know.
So, how do you like it? I might continue it, just for fun. I just had this idea of writing from a point of view of a Clan cat that was born both blind and deaf, and the thoughts that would go through their head. With this story, since 'LeafClan's Beginning' is still my main project, chapters will be fairly short. I'm just warning you. Also, to help with the next chapter that I have already started, here are the allegiances. I decided to make this occur in LeafClan, my original Clan from my forum and other stories.
LeafClan
Leader- Smokestar -Flame- Smokey gray tom with fiery amber eyes
Deputy- Briarfang -Fang- Dark brown tom with unusually long claws and fangs; bright green eyes
Medicine Cat- Stripedwhisker- ginger tom with tabby stripes and green eyes
Medicine cat apprentice -Hollystream- dark gray she-cat with blue-green eyes
Warriors
Ravenleap-Black tom with golden eyes
Mentor to Duskpaw
Aspenclaw- cream-colored tom with amber eyes
Hawkpath- gray she-cat with light brown tabby stripes and gold eyes
Pineblaze- brown tom with amber eyes
Mentor to Flamepaw
Honeyfrost-Flower- light gold she-cat with green-blue eyes
Thornheart- Brown tom with light orange eyes
Goldstream- Golden she-cat with green eyes
Mentor to Leafpaw
Willowstripe- White and gray she-cat with tabby stripes and blue-green eyes
Streamfur- Blue-gray tom with amber eyes
Dawnwing- Light gray she-cat with green eyes
Mentor to Spottedpaw
Apprentices
Flamepaw- orange tom with white paws and green eyes(Brother to Spottedpaw)
Duskpaw-Dusk- dark gray tom with green eyes(Brother to Rosepaw)
Rosepaw- tan shecat with golden eyes(Sister to Duskpaw)
Spottedpaw- white she-cat with dappled brown spots and blue-green eyes(Sister to Flamepaw)
Leafpaw- light sand-colored she-cat with amber eyes(Sister to Lostpaw)
Wish- Lostpaw- Light gray she-cat with unseeing blue eyes, deaf. Currently has no mentor because of diasbilities. (Sister to Leafpaw)
Queens
Emberwing- ginger she-cat with gold eyes.
Kits
Ivykit- cream-colored she-cat with light green eyes
Frostkit- light blue-gray tom with blue eyes
Elders
White-eye- light brown tom with one misty, unseeing eye and one green eye
Keep an eye on this list, because I will be adding names that Wish makes for her Clanmates in the -lines-. Please review! And if you want, you can come up with some of Wish's names for the other cats, that I might use. Byes! -Graymist