I knew there was something missing: I forgot the disclaimer!

Disclaimer: I do not own an original content from How to Train Your Dragon or its spin-offs. I only own this storyline.


Young Men of Berk

Snotlout stood staring out the window of the longhouse at the Dragon's Edge, sipping from a wooden tankard. Behind him, Fishlegs sat at the table, scribbling in the dragon log which he and Hiccup were using to keep notes until they went back to Berk and transferred the contents into the Book of Dragons. Snotlout swallowed, continuing to stare seriously.

Outside, a dozen yards away, Hiccup and Astrid were play-fighting over a piece of paper. Hiccup had his notebook in his left hand. They were just far away enough that Snotlout couldn't make out their muffled words, but they quickly raised their voices.

"No!" Astrid half-yelled, half-giggled as she clutched the paper to her chest, "You don't just draw a girl while she's sleeping, Hiccup!"

Hiccup, who was grinning, gave a big shrug while answering at a volume Snotlout couldn't hear.

"Ugh!" she scoffed playfully, turning away.

Before she could get very far, though, Hiccup ran up and grabbed her around her waist, sending her into a peal of giggles.

Snotlout shook his head.

"Look at them, Fishlegs," he said darkly, "Just look at them. Unashamedly blatantly displaying all their lovey-dovey affection right in the public eye."

Fishlegs, who was carefully drawing a wing, was slow to answer.

"Errm," he began without looking up, "Well, I don't know if you could really call just yourself 'the public eye.' And, besides, they're not actually 'blatantly displaying all their lovey-dovey affection.'"

"Oh, really?" asked Snotlout.

Fishlegs looked up.

Hiccup and Astrid were ardently kissing.

"Um, ok, maybe they are, but it's none of our business, anyway. And why are you looking? Are you still jealous of him?" Fishlegs accused.

"No," Snotlout replied, sticking his chin up in an offended way, "I'm not jealous like that…But… honestly, Fishlegs, between men…"

"M'yeah?" Fishlegs sighed as he looked back down at the book.

"I am jealous of that," Snotlout said, gesturing to the couple.

Fishlegs glanced up and frowned.

"Ok, now I'm confused…"

"I mean having a girlfriend, Fishlegs."

"Ohhh."

"Y'know? Where's my maiden?" Snotlout asked the wall, "I think I'm a pretty cool, awesome, Viking warrior dude."

"Yeah, well," Fishlegs sighed, looking back at the log, "There aren't really any girls our age on Berk."

"Exactly! I'm probably gonna hafta go abroad to get a girl."

"Yeah…..'cause, come to think of it, the only way we ever meet people is by trade. But they can't come to Berk because we have the dragons, so we have to go to them. And the two of us have to stay close to home because of our duties as Riders…"

Suddenly, Fishlegs looked dejected.

"I never thought about this before. Now, everything's against me. Ohhh, I'll never carry on the Ingerman family line!" he groaned and slumped over the book.

Snotlout stared at him, then strode over and clapped him on the shoulder.

"Fishlegs!" he said, "Don't give up hope. Don't worry. You and I, we're gonna get some girls, you'll see. We just hafta work a little harder than most, that's all…Look, we'll help each other."

Fishlegs looked up.

"Really?"

"Yeah, totally. See, I can help you be more…charismatic, and you can help me…be, uh…"

"Nicer?" offered Fishlegs.

"Yeah!" agreed Snotlout, "You can show me how to be all nice and sensitive and stuff…'cause girls apparently like that now…

"But don't worry!" he said confidently, slapping Fishlegs' shoulder again, "By the time we're through, we're gonna be swimming in women like Hiccup is swimming in Astrid!"

"Ok!" agreed an invigorated Fishlegs, "But…that last part sounded kind of…weird."

"Did it?" Snotlout asked, thinking for a moment, "Oh! I guess it did…"

He sniggered.

"Anyways, Fishlegs, you and I, we're gonna be irresistible. We're gonna be manly. We're gonna be smooth. And, most of all, when we see a girl, we're gonna –"

At that moment, the door flew open, slamming against the wall beside it. Ruffnut sauntered in, swinging her leggings in one hand. Her hair was unbraided and soaked with water. The greasy strands shone glossily in the light from the windows. She walked over to the opposite side of the table, a ways down from Fishlegs and Snotlout, and pulled out a stool.

"Ah!" she sighed as she plopped down and swung her legs up.

They were wet, too, and the light shimmered on the tiny beads of water among her blonde leg hairs. She reached up, grabbed one side of her hair, and started braiding it. She looked over at the boys, who were staring at her, and frowned.

"What're you starin' at? Got anything else to do?"

"Oh, uh," stammered Fishlegs, "I, uh, we're sorry, Ruff!"

He quickly glanced back down at the log. Snotlout sipped his drink. Ruff ignored them and continued braiding. After she looked away, Snotlout lowered the tankard and eyed her. He took one last swig, tossing his head back, and leaned down to Fishlegs' ear.

"Well, Fishlegs, I'll see you around," he whispered as he set down his drinking vessel.

"Um, ok…" Fishlegs mumbled as his eyes flickered to Ruff.

Snotlout straightened up, wiped his chin, smoothed his eyebrows, and walked around the table.