The other side of the story... As ever, hope you enjoy!
He'd never expected Zero to kiss him
Well, that wasn't exactly true – he more than half-expected Zero to try to kiss him again, in some dark corner or when he manufactured a way of getting them alone together again, and he just hoped that he would have the strength to walk away when he did.
So he supposed actually he'd never expected Zero to kiss him anywhere anyone could see them, or even where there was the slightest possibility that anyone would.
He'd given up on that thought, or perhaps not given up on, rather wrapped up carefully and put in a box labelled unfulfilled possibilities which he'd then put on a high shelf in the darkest part of his mind, so he wouldn't have to see it too often and be reminded of what could have been. And it was the hardest thing he'd ever had to do because he knew how it could have been, how they could have been. He'd seen it when Zero had smiled at his response after his declaration of love. And he knew Zero had only said it because he was desperate for him not to leave, but also that he'd meant it one hundred percent. And when he'd responded in that way, the only way he could (because it was the truth and he didn't have the strength to lie), and Zero had smiled, that smile, it had broken his heart just a little bit. Because he knew what he had to say next and he knew, deep down, what Zero's response would be. But it was still a surprise when it came – not so much the message but the way it was told. There was no attempt to disguise the truth, no disassembling or prevarication, just a simple honest 'No' which he guessed cost Zero as much to say, as it did him to hear. But it had at least drawn a line under it – helped him to finally put the thought where it needed to be for both their sakes. And meant that he could finally move on.
And was one more reason why he'd never expected Zero to kiss him
Which was why he'd been waiting for Lucas – still not quite able to believe that it had been so simple. That he'd just asked and Lucas had just said yes, like it was nothing. Well not nothing, he could still remember the warmth he'd felt when Lucas had said 'It's a date', but nothing out of the ordinary, nothing unexpected. And the vague misgivings he'd had about whether it was too soon after Zero, and if he should have slept with him after such a short acquaintance and how he felt about last night (because obviously it was different but that didn't mean it wasn't good, did it?) just melted away. Because he had somebody who would happily 'be with' him in public, and more than that, who didn't seem aware there would ever be an issue with that.
So he'd been on a high all day, not even worries about the Devils' future enough to bring him down – he and Lionel would fix it. And he'd been a little concerned (not worried) about Zero (although only in terms of his playing) after half-time when he'd seemed a little off – missing baskets he'd normally have sunk in his sleep and dropping passes left, right and centre – as if his mind was somewhere else. And his curiosity was piqued (and that's all it was, curiosity) because he'd been on fire before the break – seemingly on a one man mission to prove to everyone (but not anyone in particular) he was MVP right from the first game of the season. But he'd seemed to recover in the fourth quarter, making up for his errors and scoring a vital lay-up with seconds to spare, which then enabled Derek to win them the game just before the buzzer sounded. But still, he'd decided to mention it to Lucas, to see if he could find out what had happened in that third quarter, purely for the team's benefit – they couldn't afford to have one of their best players not at the top of their game, any distractions would need to be sorted. And it would just be a mention, a passing comment that he'd make in the course of their conversation because that's all it could be now – a vague concern about a player, raised with his agent because of the possible impact on the team.
Proof, if proof were needed, that he definitely never expected Zero to kiss him.
And whilst he was searching the crowded court for Lucas he saw Zero approaching, and he just knew that he had to close him down. That he couldn't risk starting a conversation with him -no, no, that wasn't right, not risk – no, that he didn't want to start a conversation with him, because he had somebody else to talk to courtside now, or would have, when Lucas got there. So he'd said, without really looking at him, 'Can't talk now – I'm meeting someone' – not to be rude or cruel, just to explain. Telling the truth because, even though he knew it might hurt, he couldn't think of another way, didn't know how else to be. And then Zero had said, 'Lucas isn't coming' and that had got his attention and he'd looked straight at him, and his heart had sunk. And he'd asked the question, even though he already knew the answer, and even though it wasn't any of the questions that were screaming in his head: 'What did I do this time?'; 'Why am I always the one who's on my own?'; 'What's wrong with me?' the loudest one of all. But instead he'd asked 'Why not?' And then Zero had answered, with a slight hitch in his voice, which he noticed but didn't comprehend. "Because I told him not to". And that made absolutely no sense – leaving him nonplussed, and he was still trying to understand, his mind thinking, but not quite connected enough to his mouth to start to say 'Why would yo…," But before even the thought had properly formed, Zero had taken a step towards him and then, suddenly in a move that Jude could never have predicted, had never expected, Zero was kissing him.
Zero had put his left hand to the side of his face a fraction of a second before his lips crashed into him. Instinct had kicked in and Jude had automatically closed his eyes when Zero had launched himself at him, but it took a little longer for everything else to kick in. A few heartbeats before his lips started to respond, the unexpectedness of it all, temporarily, paralysing him; a few more before his hands moved from beside his body up to Zero's shoulders and then slowly up past his neck to their familiar position, cupping his face. And a few moments more before his mind caught up with his body, and he realised what was actually happening – Zero was kissing him in public; letting the world know about their relationship; proclaiming that they were together – that Jude was his and he was Jude's. And then he smiled into the kiss, not able to stop the bubble of happiness that seemed to float up from his waist where Zero's right hand was even now working its way inside his suit jacket to move up towards his chest. And the bubble seemed to mirror Zero's movement until it reached his heart where, when he felt Zero return his smile, it burst, filling his body with warmth and his mind with a universe worth of shooting stars. Because it proved that Zero was happy too, that he wasn't regretting his impulsive 'moment of madness', that he wasn't so terrified by what he'd done that he was going to pull back from it. And that thought, more than any other, calmed Jude's mind. They were finally on the same page, in it together, 'just you and me', he thought before he was caught up in the kiss again, by the feeling of Zero's lips on his and the fireworks and the pure, unexpected, unadulterated joy of it.