Hello!
Before you read on, you might want to grab the tissues!
Emotions aside though, this is just a quick little one shot to pass the time. Hope you enjoy!
"Hi" the fans will know something's up as soon as I speak. I'm not myself anymore. I'm not happy, I don't laugh, I don't joke, I'm not me. "It's been a while since I last spoke to you guys... I, uh, I have my reasons though. Two months ago, something awful happened. Something I'm going to struggle talking about. Two months ago, Phil was in an accident. He, uh, he got hit by a car on the way into the city." I pause to give the fans time to take it in and so I can hold back the tears that are threatening to flow down my face. "At first he was okay... A few scars, a broken bone or two. I stayed with him in the hospital, I was by his side the whole time." I couldn't help it now, the memories of a broken and bruised Phil lying next to me filled my brain, the tears rolled down my cheeks.
I have to keep going, they deserve to know everything. "He, uh, he started to c-cough up b-blood. T-the doctors said it w-was internal injures... He had pu-punctured something." My head fell into my hands and I could do nothing but cry. "Phil..." I couldn't say it. If I do it becomes reality. Breathe Dan, just breathe. You can do it, just say it once and it's over with. "The doctors tried everything the could to save him. I wish I could say he's fine, he's walking around in the kitchen. I wish I could say he'll be making a video to explain everything to you, but I can't... Phil died on the 23rd of April at 1:28pm".
"I know this is tough, I've been dealing with it for two months and I've only just managed to say he's dead. There's nothing anyone can do for him now and sitting around crying over it isn't what Phil would want. We need to be strong here. Try and remember all the good things about Phil, like how he mixes Shreddies with Shredded Wheat or how he always puts his hand over his mouth when he giggles. His cute little meows and his love for lions. Everything about Phil was... He was magical. He was and will forever be the best man I have ever met. I was miserable before I found Phil, he was so much older than me but he never let the age difference bother him. When we became friends I so happy! Then he asked me to move in and everything in life was awesome. I was happy, he was happy and you guys were just being your usual selves! I just want to say thank you in advance. I know you're all going to be so strong and helpful during this hard time. I know because you've always been a caring bunch, you've never not helped me out when I asked. So thank you, for always being there. "
"So I take it you all want to know what happens now. Well, I'm not going to stop making videos. I love this job and Phil would want me to continue. Also, I'll going to leave all of Phil's videos up. Bad news though, I can't continue the radio show. With Phil gone, it's like a part will be missing from it. I don't think I'd be able to manage without him anyway. Don't worry though, it's not like you'll never see me again."
"I think that's it then. If anyone of you want to talk then leave a comment or send me a tweet. I'll try and answer any of your questions. Thank you again guys. I love you all so much... Bye." With that I switch off the camera and realised, for the first time since Phil passed away, I was smiling.
It wasn't that bad was it? Don't worry, I cried too. ~Em
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