A/N: Hello everyone, I just have this really old fanfic that I wanted to share for sometime now. It actually has a lot of chapters. The problem is that it's not finished and it takes a lot of time editing, since my English sucked back then. Means that I will continue this, only if I see that you guys like it enough! So please, let me know if you like it, and if so, I'll publish the rest of the chapters.

Warning: OOCness (I try, I really try); HieixKurama; HieixMukuro; fluffiness, drama, action, friendship, romance; also sorry for bad English, currently, I don't have a beta reader.

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho!

Anguish

The Night After

Kurama stared at the full bottle for a long minute, cradling it in both his hands. He let it drop to his lap, feeling its cold surface through the thin fabric of his cotton pants. It was too quiet. The house was empty. It didn't make a lot of difference. He knew that he was alone, and yet, he'd been alone many nights in this room. No. This time, he knew that his loneliness would last forever. His mother shall never walk at the doorway again, late at night, coming home from late night shift. He'd never see her smile at him, never taste her cooking, hear her voice or wish her good night. She had died that same night, surrounded by yellowish hospital walls which reeked of disease.

He glanced down at his lap. The bottle was still there. He wanted to weep so hard so that all the neighborhood would hear his agony But he knew his place. He was the legendary Youko Kurama, Youkos never cried... Right? The only human who had kept him attached to this world had died. He pulled his hand over the cork, and opened the bottle, staring at its contents through the opening, suddenly resembling a deep never-ending dark pit. He would drawn himself with liqueur if needed. The redhead's lips neared the opening. He gulped it, sucking more and more like a thirsty animal, not allowing himself to get used to the bitter taste. He would let himself imagine it was the milk his human mother used to give him when he was a baby. It burned down his throat as though a punishment for his foolishness - a Youko who was grieving over a human.

The one crack that came form the window's direction startled him. It made him almost choke on his drink, and he jumped in surprise in his spot on the bed, his lips parting from the bottle of sake he had bought only half an hour ago.

He could hear the window being pushed open and then closed, and lifted his gaze to see a shady figure slipping silently into his bedroom, crossing it in the dark and approaching him. The darkness was chased away by a soft touch on the light switch, as the 'mysterious' figure could be seen now more clearly.

"Hiei..." he gasped, blinking at the light. He'd been sitting there in total darkness since he arrived home from hospital, staring so much that his eyes were now momentarily blinded by the sudden light. The fire demon grunted, and took his cloak off, tossing it over the chair that stood in front of Kurama's desk, as he usually did. Lately, he'd been visiting the red fox frequently, getting closer to the redhead demon than ever before.

As for Kurama, it wasn't so unusual to witness Hiei entering his bedroom, like a thief in the middle of the night, but it seemed that the redhead just forgot about Hiei's existence for those long minutes he had indulged himself in the complete darkness. He watched now blankly as the fire demon walked toward him, and took a seat on the edge of the bed. He could feel the mattress's sudden movement under his body, as his friend sat next to him, raising thin black eyebrows at the sight of the bottle resting between the half-Youko's legs.

"You're drinking." Hiei eyed the bottle.

After one long minute of silence, Kurama replied: "Yes, I am."

"And you look sick, too." the fire demon added. He watched the redhead, as the other sighed in grief once again, and waited. Figuring out that Hiei wouldn't quit staring at him until he spilled the beans, Kurama surrendered to the searching red eyes, and inhaled deeply, almost feeling the air filling his lungs.

"My mother died, Hiei." his voice came out weak, broken. He was even surprised at himself.

The smaller youkai scooted closer to him, and sat now fully on the bed "So this is why you're drinking." he concluded dryly, and took another glance at the bottle by the corner of his eye "Would you mind to give me a sip?"

Kurama's eyes widened, as if he just woke up from an horrible dream. Blinking, he handed the bottle to the fire demon. Hiei took the bottle and pushed himself backward, so that his back leaned against the wall next to the bed. Picking up the alcohol, he observed it for a brief moment before letting his lips touch its cold opening. He gulped it down then, as though it was water, until Kurama bothered to look at him, widening his eyes again, but said nothing. Hiei eyed him with the corner of his eye and had to stop drinking to not spill the liquid, as hw started to laugh mildly at Kurama's surprised face. He gave the redhead back the now half empty bottle, and licked his lips "Makai alcohol is better." he noted, revealing one pointy tooth. He watched as Kurama stared intensely at the bottle once again "Kurama... You should have known it'd be no good to get attached to someone, especial ningens." he said then softly, and lay on the bed, having his head next to Kurama's thighs.

"She... She was everything to me..." the redhead whispered "Everything that I never had." and now, it was all gone. He had thought that yes, once in his life, he had something stable, someone that he could always come back to, and was permanent. It wasn't like Makai, he wasn't wandering off anywhere here in the Ningenkai. And yet, here, in his mother's house, next to his mother, no, it was only her presence that made him feel so secured, she was home to him.

Hiei listened and closed his eyes. There was a pause, then a sucking sound. Kurama was drinking. The minutes passed in silence, as the redhead leaned his head back to the wall. It seems that Hiei fell asleep on the bed, but Kurama wasn't sure and didn't mind to know anyway. He returned to gaping at the bottle again, and sighed. He wasn't used to the bitterness of it. He had never been a drinker, and when he did drink as a Youko, it was probably a fine wine, maybe a sweet liquor. But no, he had never liked drinking from the bottle. His Youko side had its manners. And yet, he wanted to make his anguish to just go away, he wanted to forget it just for a little while. He wanted to make himself feel good again. He lifted the bottle once more, and gulped the strong liquid down, determined to empty it all, down to the last drop.

Watching hazily, Hiei was licking his lips at the sight of a mourning Kurama. He had never seen his friend like this before. He was amazed, so much amazed, and yet, the alcohol did affect his small body. It made him forget his own problems. After all, he had downed half of that bottle. But now, it all started to feel like a dream, a very heavy, and spirally dream. "That's right. Drink it all down, fox..." Hiei chuckled drunkenly, waving one arm in the air, and pointing his finger to the ceiling. Kurama breathed, as though he was encouraged by his friend's words, and took another sip from the bottle, feeling his eyes sting. He coughed some of it, and hiccuped after covering his mouth, somehow managing to keep on his manners even in his state.

"I loved her, Hiei..." he said softly, a warm tear rolling down his cheek "I want her here. With me..."

The fire demon opened his eyes forcefully when he heard a sniffling sound, and looked up at the redhead who started to sob to his hand, covering his face in shame. Hiei could see how red the half-Youko's face was, and the tears, so many tears being shed for the sake of one human. A human who other demons would gladly eat raw or cook for pleasure. Just a stinky human being. But Hiei knew better than underestimate humans. Kurama was maybe disgracing himself for one at the moment, and yet, after all they had been through with Yusuke, the fire demon could understand. He tried to sit up again, but couldn't, having his head spin, now. Instead, supported by both his hands, he raised up somewhat and fell on Kurama, wrapping his arms around his friend's shoulders loosely.

"There there, K'rama..." he rested his head against the redhead's shoulder "You make me feel (hic) sorry for you..." he muttered, and tried to stroke Kurama's back soothingly, managing to pet it instead. Touched by Hiei's words, the half-Youko slipped his arms around Hiei and hugged him back tightly, turning to cry shamelessly on the fire demon's shoulder.

"What do I do now...?" he murmured softly, his head heavy on Hiei's shoulder now. He could feel his eyes showering warmly to his cheek, rolling down to be absorbed in Hiei's shirt. His arms were locked tightly around the other, finding in him some comfort.

At the question Hiei cringed a little, feeling dizzy. As much as he hated to admit it, he wasn't much a drinker. Ningenkai alcohol affected him differently than Makai's, and the small size of his body didn't help at all. He wasn't one to comfort either, and yet, it seemed that the alcohol had warmed not only his body, but his heart as well "Fff...Forget her..." he mumbled, getting sleepy in Kurama's grip. Unconsciously, he let himself lean all of his weight against the half-Youko, causing them both to fall onto the bed, and what little that was left in the sake bottle to spill on the white sheets "Oops..." he said with lidded eyes, his arms still around Kurama who was now lying underneath him, feeling trapped under the drunk youkai, as he tried to push Hiei away.

"Hiei..." he struggled, feeling his arms week "Please, move." Hiei, who had his eyes closed for a long moment, woke up from Kurama's harsh movements and opened his eyes sleepily, meeting green deep eyes, stained tear cheeks, and one heck hot redhead before his very eyes.

"Wow..." he murmured, staring into emerald orbs "You're gorgeous." he suddenly leaned downward, and kissed the redhead clumsily, missing the lips "Oops..." he pecked the corner of Kurama's mouth, not really sure what he was doing, and where did those sensual looking lips disappeared to. As if by accident, or maybe fate, he felt their lips meet, his own melting against the other pair sloppily, finding them warm, yet of a bitter taste.

For a long moment, Kurama just felt Hiei's lips moving over his. It would be hard to say whether he was aware of his best friend kissing him, or he just found the situation as a very nice and dizzy little dream. Either way, his Youko half couldn't help but to respond, finding it all very comforting, as he wrapped his arms around the fire demon's neck "Hiei..." he moaned into the kiss, letting his arms half fall around Hiei's neck, his fingers threading together.

Trying to stay balanced now, but failing, the dark haired youkai let his head drop against Kurama's neck, nuzzling and kissing it sloppily. What a nice dream... Umm... He felt extremely exhausted... Without even realizing it, his eyelids drooped down heavily, as his head finally rested against the bed, and he fell asleep.

A/N: Thank you for reading! Next chapter: "An Empty Family House"