As I hear footsteps coming up the stairs, I snap the diary closed and try to look as innocent as I can.
She comes in and…
"AHA! I knew it"
She's caught me!
Truthfully. I was reading her diary. She was an interesting specimen to examine for finalising my plans to obliterate earth. It's not that I don't like it here. Good food, nice bed and I'm really quite fond of specimen B (I call her Brittany.) But I have a mission. A mission to assist the Great Galactic Feline Universal Paw-over scheme and I'm not going to fail. Again.