Hello Everyone, and welcome back!

I decided to break this story into 2 parts, and so I would recommend reading the other one first if you haven't already. This is a SwanQueen story through and through, so if there are any parts containing RedQueen or any other pairings just know that SwanQueen is endgame.

I hope you all enjoy and leave reviews, as they are my drug of choice and motivation to keep this going. Enjoy!

This first chapter is sort of another intro so it will be a shorter chapter than usual.

Chapter 1

It was all up to me?

What did she mean by that? And what the hell could I do to fix this situation?

It's not as though there are any rules for something like this, in fact I believe it to be unheard of and therefore I have no idea how to even begin to approach a solution. I doubt there is a book that could clue me in.

We have been seated on the couch for the past 10 minutes or so, both just staring blankly at some inanimate object in the room.

I simply cannot fathom that she has done this and my emotions are so conflicted. In one way I am glad that I was able to go back and to feel the type of love that was built over time between us. Once I let it in it just took over my heart and I know now that there was no fighting it.

But now I know what it is like to be loved by no other than Emma Swan only to know the excruciating pain of having it taken away from me; of having her taken away from me before we were even able to consummate our love, to let our love flourish into something amazing.

I didn't care about my happiness anymore, I just wanted her back. I wanted Henry to have her back too. And I would make that happen at all and any costs. Honestly, what did I even have to lose? I know there was always Henry to think of, but he had said himself that it wasn't the life he wanted and neither did I.

I would do whatever I had to, whatever Tink told me needed to be done.

As I look over to her I see the guilt all over her face, I can feel the waves of despair coming off of her as she quietly sat next to me, and its then that I realize that I had two close friends that I never would have realized had it not been for all of this.

She and Ruby had cared for me so deeply that I could see the pain in their eyes, in their body and it made me feel a little warmer inside to know that I wasn't alone.

Finally I pull Tink out of her thoughts as I turn to her and take her hand.

"I want her back; I want Henry to have his other mother back so tell me what I have to do?" I ask.

She looks at me and I can see her physically swallow, so I know this cannot be good.

"Regina, the only way you can have her back is if you go back to the real time. The time where Emma is now the Dark One because that is the only reality where she is still alive." She tells me and grips my hand harder as she waits for my reaction.

"But… what about another second chance… a third chance? Surely you could send me back to the beginning?" I ask her as my plan starts to crumble.

"Oh Regina, it took a lot of fairy dust to do it the first time, and even if I did, like I told you honey, every time you go back to… she will defend you with her life, and I don't think she will make it. Could you live like that? Knowing that it would inevitably happen again, could you watch her parish again?" she asks me and doesn't let go of my hand when I try to pull away from her.

"Then make me forget. Just send me back to live out as many days as I can!" I tell her desperately, tears springing to my eyes.

"But then you won't remember your love, and even though it is strong, look at what happened the first time. You guys fought each other, and then fought together, but never the way you were meant to be. Could you bear that again? With no knowledge Regina, who's to say it won't all happen as it had the first time?" she asks me gently as she is scared I may break, and even now I do not want to be coddled.

"Well than what the hell am I supposed to do? You say it is up to me but you leave me no options!" I yell as I get off of the couch and walk over to the window looking out at nothing since it is still dark.

"I am sorry Tink, I appreciate what you tried to do, and you are a good friend, but my life is so completely fucked! I just… I am" I start to tremble as I fall to the floor, "I am just so tired of it all." I tell her lowly as she rushes over from the couch and brings her arms around me.

"I need you to tell me what to do, what option to do I have?" I ask her through tears as she does her best to hold onto me with her tiny little body.

I take deep breaths as I sit there and let her rocky my body back and forth in a comforting motion.

I close my eyes and let her warmth spread over me and as my eyes start to grow heavy. Then I see Emma before me and I see her smiling at me, and then she's taking me in her arms and gently rocking my body and I feel so safe, for that moment I feel whole. I know that I need to be with her with every fiber of my being. I cannot give up on her.

"Regina." I hear Tink say, pulling me out of my daydream.

"Hmm?" I mumble to her as I am still basking in the warmth around me.

"Regina, I know you are exhausted but we need to come up with a plan before you fall back to sleep." She gently tells me in my ear so I look over my shoulder at her, and realize that I must have started to drift off.

"Take me back to her; I need her Tink, like I've never needed anyone before in my life." I tell her with certainty because I don't want to live without her.

"Okay, then we go back." She says, although she looks away and doesn't seem too optimistic about it.

I pull her face back to mine as I turn around.

"I'm going to get her back Tink, no matter what it takes, I will get her back, and this time I will never let go." I tell her as I get up and dust off my clothes with a new determination.

"But she's the Dark One." Tink says, and I don't blame her for not believing.

"Yes and I was the Evil Queen. They are just labels and its time I started figuring out how to get her back instead of wallowing in my own despair. Take me back so that I can get my Emma back!" I tell her and as she stands and straightens herself I see a look delight flashing in her eyes.

"As you wish, your Majesty" she says smiling as she takes my hand and everything turns white.

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