Disclaimer: I don't own Les Miserables or the characters, though I wish I did.
A/N: Well, it's been a while but I've finally decided to start the sequel :) It picks up right where Moonless Skies ends off and if you haven't read that go do that because this won't make too much sense without it. I've got big things planned for the story and, as always, I really appreciate your reviews, follows, and favourites xx Enjoy!
...
A Lie
"A toast," Grantaire chimed, the brandy in his cup swaying with his drunken steps as he paced around the table, "to our newlyweds!"
Joly and Julie blushed, clinking their own cups together and chuckling as the rest did the same with a hearty cheer.
"May your years be filled with happiness and love!" Cosette added, a hint of bitterness in her voice but a smile that lit up the room on her face.
The table they all sat around stretched out to cover the entire hall, Les Amis sitting near the left side and Joly and Julie's families sitting farther to the right, the pale moon and the lanterns around them illuminating their surroundings . Bouquets of flowers rested in between roast chickens, a mushroom and beef stew, rice, and roasted potatoes and Grantaire had generously brought the alcohol, especially the brandy which he had enjoyed several glasses of.
Eponine glanced periodically behind her to the two small cribs Juliette and Henri slept soundly in and breathed a sigh of relief every time she saw his tiny chest rising slowly.
It had been nearly three hours that he had fallen asleep, seven hours since the initial wedding and eight hours since Eponine had forgotten the dangers of the streets outside and that her heart had been torn to pieces earlier.
Etienne Enjolras, the man who she had spent a very regretful night with, conceived a child from, and fallen in and out of love with had made it excruciatingly clear that whatever affection they had managed to keep for one another was pointless because things would never return to the way they were, or at least, the way she wanted them to be. They would be better off accepting that before doing anything else. And so, the man who sat across the table from her, who looked cold and angry and happy all at once, who made eye contact with her every once in a while to make sure she was fine, was also the man who she felt a deep hatred and passion for that she didn't know existed.
Yet, she swayed in a mixture of dismay and confusion and something that felt like grief but couldn't possibly be because, as odd as it was, she didn't really care for the way he acted. Sure, it was heartbreaking to know that yet another man could not stand to love her, but for some reason, she didn't care whether or not this man loved her or not.
"You're staring into space." Azelma enunciated, waving her hand in front of the waif's face furiously.
She blinked a few times and faced her sister, "W-what?"
"I've been calling your name for five minutes, what an Earth are you thinking about?"
"I – I'm just tired. Henri's been keeping me up lately."
"Oh," she shook her head, "well try not to think about that right now. We're trying to have fun tonight and I don't want you to be sad. You deserve to have fun tonight, isn't that right Enjolras?"
The man's head snapped up and he smirked at the two sisters, "What are you on about now Mademoiselle?"
Eponine stifled a laugh and Azelma mocked him before saying, "Doesn't Eponine deserve to have fun tonight?"
"Of course, why wouldn't she?"
"Exactly!" She turned towards the waif, "Oh 'Ponine, I know it's tough being a mother but don't drive yourself mad because of it."
"I won't 'Zelma, I promise." She tried to smile but the lack of truth in her grin made Enjolras scowl before he looked away and took another sip of his brandy and Azelma huffed and returned to her conversation with Courfeyrac.
Is it terribly obvious, she thought, hoping her cheeks weren't turning the bright crimson colour they always did, that I can't?
It wasn't Henri, or her lack of sleep, or even the fact that Enjolras couldn't love her back – it was that no man ever could. She had gone through Montparnasse in her youth, Marius during the last few years and now the father of a child she'll have to face every day. She felt like an idiot holding that bitter seed within her, yet, how could she not? Her sister was falling in love with her friend, Joly and Julie were married, Cosette and Marius have a child as well – and then there is her. The lonely waif with an unlucky streak of losing every man she touched. But she was at a wedding, and no matter how hard the task was, she had to at least look happy, for her friends' sake.
With a smile plastered on her face, she punched Azelma's shoulder and watched as her sister rejoiced in her own happiness and swept her into the conversation and into the rest of the night.
...
After another three hours, Marius and Cosette had taken Juliette home, Julie and Joly's parents and families had returned to their inn across the street, and Courfeyrac and Grantaire had offered to take Azelma back home. Only the newlyweds and the soon to be divorcees remained, one pair snuggling by the remaining flames that crackled in the fireplace and the others ignoring one another to the best of their abilities.
Eponine leaned against the brick wall leading to the upper level of the church sourly and Enjolras paced the front entrance with his hands stuffed into his pockets, still bothering to check on Eponine now and then with a quick glance.
"Congratulations, I mean it." The man mentioned briefly to Joly as he moved past them, holding a box full of decorations and setting it by the door.
"Thank you," he patted him on the back and chuckled, "I can't believe I'm married."
"Neither can I -" he tried to smile but seemed conflicted with his choice of words, "I know you two will be happy with one another."
"I know we will be. Thank you, friend." He motioned for Julie to come and he propped the door open with his leg, "We'll be back if you need any help."
"Oh no, no. We were just on our way out. I've got to put Henri to sleep anyways." Eponine added quickly, hesitantly joining Enjolras after she had taken her son out of his make shift crib. She tucked that underneath her arm and watched as the man took it from her with a smirk.
They bid farewell to Julie and Joly one last time and stepped out the door.
"Let's go."
...
The air seemed particularly cold and unruly as the two made their ways down each rue, Eponine holding Henri tightly to her chest and covering him with her own jacket and Enjolras seeming to be deep in thought as he navigated them to their apartments.
"Did you enjoy yourself after all?"
The sudden comment caught Eponine off guard, "Hm?"
"Did you enjoy yourself?" He repeated, annoyance ringing in his voice.
"Yes, I suppose so."
"That wasn't very convincing." He remarked.
Eponine's mouth hung open a little bit and she shook her thoughts loose, "What do you want?"
"I want you to be honest with me. You were staring at the wall above my head for nearly five hours after the wedding; do you honestly think I believe that you were okay?"
It was her turn to be annoyed, "No, I honestly don't!"
Henri squirmed uncomfortably and she lowered her voice, "You've obliterated my sanity, Enjolras."
"That was a nice choice of words." He raised an eyebrow and took their son from her and watched as she stood in place, turning the colour of red he had seen her turn a thousand times over by now.
"Stop it! How can you act like nothing hurts you?" Eponine flinched suddenly, knowing she had struck a nerve with the man, knowing that in the five months since Henri was born and their relationship as parents had blossomed, he hated being told that he was indifferent and cold.
"I'm sorry," she sighed, "I'm sorry."
He sighed as well, shaking his head, "It was because of me, wasn't it?"
"Yes."
"Because of what I told you about how we could never love one another?"
"Yes."
"Does that honestly bother you?" He met her eyes and she looked away, "I know you don't have any affection left for me in your heart, so why bother caring?"
She shook her head, "Because that's who I am. I can't just let things go Enjolras; it takes time for me to heal."
He nodded.
"But I'm glad that we spoke. I know things will never be the way they were, and –" she took a prolonged breath, "and I'm glad."
"Good."
She looked up and found herself standing in front of their new homes. Enjolras had purchased two apartments next-door to one another for himself and the waif just a month ago, after earning enough money from teaching history at a local university.
After she had taken Henri and his crib from him, she opened her door and stepped into her home with a sour taste left in her mouth.
How could she have admitted how she felt to Enjolras? Even if how she felt was blatantly obvious, she didn't know why she had thought that he would care, or that he would apologize for making her feel so useless right before their friends' wedding. He was Enjolras, and the best that she could get from him was a nod – she was lucky she even got a 'good' in return. If she was ever going to be happy, she had to move on from him, and from every man that had held a place in her heart at all.
And starting from that day, she promised herself that she would.
Enjolras opened the door to his apartment, after making sure the waif went inside safely, then slammed it shut behind him and sank against the door.
...
"Good." He spat miserably, chuckling harshly at his choice of words. No matter what he did, he always managed to make her feel as though she was trapped with a monster for the rest of her life. As though one night had bound her to the devil.
He had changed after the barricades, after becoming a father, and she knew that. Yet, no matter how hard anybody tried, he was still the man of marble, the young man who was as charming as he was terrible – even to himself.
He slammed his fist into the ground and yelped. How could he ever make Eponine see how much he loved her without scaring her away? Without making that crevice of himself that had inhabited his body when he lost his memory come back? How could he ever make her see that he was killing himself trying to rid himself of what he felt for her?
He had tried to forget her, tried to remind himself that he had wedded a young woman who was the daughter of criminals, whose only clothes used to be rags and whose only aspirations were to marry Marius and somehow rid herself of her miserable past. But over the course of time she had become the beautiful, intelligent, and strong woman he was lucky to have ever spent that ridiculous night with. He had thanked the bottle of Chablis he had washed down before he encountered her so many nights ago and thanked that part of his mind that had made her love him during those brief few weeks he fell ill a thousand times over.
Somehow, Eponine Jondrette Thenardier had wedged herself into his heart, and the only was he would be happy living with the fact that he loved a woman who could never love him back was by telling her to move on and find someone who would truly love her back. Someone she wouldn't have to fight for or cry over. Someone she could spend a lifetime with without being reminded of something they had but could never reconcile.
He sat in his own bitter thoughts for the rest of the night, leaning against the wall that separated them, wishing that he could go to his family, but knowing that they would be happier without him.
He did this until everything finally faded to black.