"I love you." Lord Voldemort said, hugging each and every Death Eater. Most looked like they were going to drop dead. "Lucius, you're my best friend." Voldemort said. "Now next time I go to kill Harry Potter I'm going to say, Hey Harry, want a cookie?" Voldemort said, looking very proud. "By the way Snape I love you. Bother." Voldemort said, poking a Death Eater's arm. "I have something very important to tell you all, don't kill Harry I love him, all female Death Eater's must bring me flowers, I were pink thongs, my real name is Barney, I'm gay, I'm Harry and Draco's father." Voldemort said.
"Sir, are you feeling alright, and your not my son's father." Lucius said, stepping forward.
"Wow, I smell pretty, I'm really stupid." Voldemort said, tapping his head with his finger. "I love puppies do you? Can I borrow a pink dress, lady's? Im going to stop trying to kill Harry Potter and get a life. What would I do for a Klondike Bar? Im a total wheeny, and pixies sing me to sleep every night.