I do not own any books, movies, magazines, short stories, or television programs including, but not limited to, that which the following is based on.

I wrote a parody. Enjoy, or not, it's your choice.

Warrior-cleric: I am a warrior-cleric working for a quasi-religious organization that is overtly meant to resemble the Roman Catholic church, and I do battle with evil vampires who seek to hunt Terrans.

Audience: Good gravy, wasn't that officially declared a trite cliché in the 1840's? Who keeps writing this crap? That's it, that's all I can take, I'm not just going to stop watching this; I'm going to throw my TV out the window in disgust!

The audience does so.

Vampire: Grrr, I'm an evil vampire. I might be involved in a big and evil, yet vague, spooky conspiracy. And did I mention that I'm a vampire, because I am, you know?

NordicRanger: Oh Hell, even I have standards!! I'm going to go read a book.

NordicRanger does so.

The End.