My sad attempt to kick writer's block...

It's not like Mike had known what to expect when he got into a relationship with Harvey. He had never really considered a relationship with Harvey to be something truly attainable to begin with. Harvey had made it obvious at the beginning that he didn't do relationships, he only did one night stands. Mike refused to be one of Harvey's one night stands.

Mike's pretty sure he fell in love with Harvey, maybe not at first sight, but it was close enough that one could make an argument that that's exactly what it was. Right off the bat Harvey had given him this huge opportunity, one he wasn't even sure he was entirely deserving of at the time. He'd barely known anything about Mike at the time, yet he saw the potential, and instead of wanting to exploit it for his own personal gain, the way many people in Mike's past had done, Harvey wanted Mike to better himself with it. It was hard for Mike not to look at Harvey like he'd roped the moon and hung the stars after that.

Harvey, on the other hand, he hadn't fallen in love, instead he had more or less tripped and stumbled into it. He didn't want to like Mike as much as he did. He fought it with everything he had long before realizing that it was a losing battle. Mike was different from anybody he had ever met, and sure, that sounds cliché, but Mike was eager, witty, and brilliant beyond words. Yet despite his obvious brilliance, he could be so beautifully naive about certain things, and people. Mostly people. He sees the good in people, and is always willing to give them the benefit of the doubt, and while that's what would be considered a weakness for a lawyer, and Harvey will never admit this to Mike out loud because of the fact that it is a weakness for a lawyer, but Harvey kind of admires the blind faith Mike has in people.

It starts with little things, Harvey asking Mike to stay and have a drink with him after a meeting with a client. Working a case late at night and having it ultimately turn into impromptu bonding over pizza and sharing things about their lives, their pasts with each other. There's a small voice inside their heads telling them they should keep it professional, but it feels so natural that it's easy to drown out that voice.

Things just slowly fall in to place for them. They have their arguments, the stress of the day's work usually what causes said arguments, but they can always work them out relatively quickly, put it in the past, and move on and away from it.

The little baby steps quickly turn into strides, and Mike thinks things are maybe moving too fast when Harvey asks him if he wants to move into his condo. He says no at first, but Harvey is able to turn that no into a yes in less than a week's time. Even outside of work Mike is given reminders as to why Harvey is the best at what he does.

The advantages and sometimes disadvantages of living with someone is you get to know them better. Mike learns from living with Harvey that sometimes in the middle of the night Harvey will wake up, crawl out of bed, and just stand out on the balcony and overlook the lights of the city below. The first few times he noticed it, he just watched from afar, wondering what was running through his head. Harvey's head space wasn't exactly the easiest to get into. Harvey keeps a lot to himself. Even on those late nights, or over dinner, when they were swapping stories about life, there were areas of conversation that Harvey would immediately steer away from if brought up. Despite being curious, Mike never pushed Harvey into talking more than he wanted to, he figured he would tell him when he was comfortable with it.

Eventually Mike decided to join Harvey on one of those nights on the balcony. The air was crisp, and thick with summertime.

"Hey," Mike said sleepily.

"I didn't wake you, did I?"

"No, I can't sleep right. Keep thinking about court in the morning."

"You'll do fine," Harvey assured him.

Mike walked up and positioned himself next to Harvey, forearms resting against the banister the same way Harvey's were. They didn't say anything after that. They didn't need to, the moment was perfect just like that. Surrounded by millions of people, but up there above it all it felt like it was just the two of them. In moments like these Mike couldn't believe he had ever thought moving in with Harvey was too fast. Seemed just perfect from where he stood.

It stayed that way for a while. Then Mike got a phone call that changed things.

They had just gotten home from work, they were in the process of kicking off their shoes, loosening the ties, and just enjoying being able to breathe in each other in a way they couldn't when they were at work. Mike had disappeared down the hallway and returned wearing a red cotton t-shirt and an old pair of jeans, he sat down next to Harvey, who was still mostly in his suit, on the sofa and let out an exasperated sigh.

Harvey reached over and grasped a fistful of Mike's shirt and used it to pull him into a kiss. Mike closed his eyes and was starting to get lost in the moment, when Harvey pulled away from him. "I've got to run an errand really quick," he all but whispered.

"What errand?"

"I, uh, just forgot some papers back at the office."

"Can't it wait?"

"I'll be really quick. Promise," Harvey replied with a smile, before kissing Mike once more before getting up and heading out the door.

Mike figured while Harvey was running back to the office he would start dinner as a surprise when he came home.

While he was in the middle of cooking he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket, it was Donna.

"Hello?"

"Where's Harvey?"

"He went back to the office to pick up some papers he left. Why? What's up?"

"How long ago did he leave?"

"I don't know, like, 20 minutes? Why? Is something wrong?"

"No. Nothing's wrong, I was actually just calling because of some papers he left here. I was going to see if he needed me to run them to the condo, but since he's on his way I'll just wait for him."

"Oh. Well, he should be there soon. Probably stuck in traffic or something."

"Yeah..probably."

"Hey, why didn't you just call Harvey's cell phone?"

"I tried, went straight to voice mail."

"Oh."

"Look, I'm going to stick around here a little bit longer. If you talk to him before I do, let him know that those papers are on his desk."

"Will do."

As soon as Mike got off the phone he dialed Harvey's number, it's not that he didn't believe Donna, it's just that it was weird for Harvey to have his phone off. Harvey never has his phone off. Sure enough, it went straight to voice mail, so Mike went ahead and left a message explaining that the papers Harvey needed were on his desk and then hung up the phone.

He didn't think much of it beyond that, and just went back to cooking. But then dinner was done, and Harvey still wasn't home. Dinner was cold, and Harvey still wasn't home. Mike was trying not to panic, and work out logical explanations in his head, but none of them overrode that panic. He was dialing Harvey's number every five minutes, his heartbeat so loud in his own ears he wasn't sure he'd even be able to hear Harvey's voice if he were to pick up the phone.

When he got sick of hearing voice mail pick-up on Harvey's phone he called Donna, and Donna couldn't provide him with any information he didn't already have, but she did a better job at calming him down just enough that he wasn't climbing the walls completely.

He was on the phone with her a third time when he heard the sound of the familiar sound of the doorknob being turned. When Harvey's face appeared from behind the door, Mike rushed over to him and wrapped his arms so tight around him that he wasn't even sure if Harvey could breathe.

"Mike..could you maybe loosen the grip? Just a little?"

Mike did as he was asked. Letting go of Harvey and taking a step back. He quickly wiped away the tears that had started to form in his eyes. "What the hell happened?"

"I'm so sorry that I'm late."

"I didn't ask you for an apology, Harvey. I asked you what happened."

"I guess I just got caught up in conversation back at the office, and time got away from me."

"Conversation with who?"

"Does it matter?"

"Why wouldn't it?"

"It was Donna."

Mike felt his heart sink like an anchor in his chest. Harvey had just boldfaced lied to him. "Donna?"

"Yeah. Donna. You know how it is with old friends, Mike."

"Why didn't you have your cell phone on?"

"My battery was flashing low so I turned it off."

"Right."

"You have every right to be mad at me. I really am sorry, and I feel awful about it."

"I'm just glad you're all right. I'm really tired though, so I'm going to call it a night. I made dinner for you, but you'll have to heat it up. It's on the counter."

"Mike…," Harvey trailed off.

"Harvey. It's okay. Really."

It was hard for things to go back to normal after that, because Mike couldn't get the fact that Harvey had lied to him out of his mind. He was always thinking about it, wondering what really happened, wondering if Harvey was cheating on him. He was more suspicious of phone calls Harvey got, and paid close attention to little things he wouldn't have even bothered noticing before. It was starting to feel like there was a dark cloud looming over their relationship, even though Harvey hadn't given him any reason to be suspicious since that night.

That is, until he woke up late one night, he figured Harvey had disappeared out on to the balcony, so he pulled himself from his sleep so he could go join him, thinking maybe having one of their moments on the balcony would put things into perspective. Only Harvey wasn't there. Mike debated calling his cell phone, but ultimately decided against it, because maybe he didn't want to really know.

Instead he went back to bed, pretending to sleep, and waited until Harvey came crawling back into bed, a little after three in the morning. When Mike felt Harvey's arm wrap tight around him he could feel his chest get tight. He stayed awake the rest of the night trying his best to not think about the worst, and failing miserably at it.

One more time and Mike was going to confront him about it, Mike told himself. His one more time came barely a week later.

"Jason, we just can't do this anymore. I mean, not like this, anyway. Mike, the guy I've been telling you about, well, I don't want him to get the wrong idea about us, and it's too hard to come here and do this and then go back to him. Don't get me wrong, this won't stop completely, I'll still come here, just not as often." Harvey takes a deep breath in and pushes it out. "It's just that I know that it's not good for me to be here all the time because it keeps me stuck in the past, and I want to move on, and move forward. I think Mike is my reason to move forward," Harvey says, smiling weakly. "I guess I should probably get going now. It's about that time. Love you."

Once Harvey is back in his car, he just sits there for awhile. He'd said goodbye a long time ago, but it felt different this time, like there was some finality to it. He felt his heart ache in his chest the way it hasn't in a long time.

The moment Harvey stepped through the door and saw Mike, that ache in his chest stopped completely.

"What are you doing up? It's late," Harvey said.

"Where were you? And I swear if you lie to me I am packing my shit and leaving tonight."

"I was visiting a friend."

"A friend? At almost one in the morning? Give me a fucking break, Harvey."

"Mike..just calm down. It's not what you think."

"Really? Because what I think, no, what I know is you lied straight to my face, and now you've been sneaking around doing god knows what with god knows who, and I'm so fucking sick of it."

"You're right, I did lie to you, and I have been sneaking around."

Mike swallowed hard, for some reason Harvey just freely confessing when confronted caught him off guard. "How could you do this to me?" He barely managed to choke out the words.

"I'm not cheating on you. I mean, not technically, I guess."

"Not technically? What the hell does that even mean?"

"There was this guy. Jason. I was head over heels, stupid in love with him, end of high school, beginning of college. He was my longest relationship, thought that he'd be my only relationship for awhile there. We'd been together almost four years and things were going good, almost perfect really, and then he was just..gone."

Whatever anger Mike had been feeling completely dissipated when he saw the look on Harvey's face, and heard the tone of his voice. He'd never heard Harvey sound so vulnerable.

"What happened?"

"It was a car accident. After that, I guess I just kind of got in a habit of going out to visit his grave, and I'd just talk to him. Sometimes for hours. It sounds ridiculous, but there was something comforting about it. After stressful days, or just when ever I felt a little too alone in this world. I'm getting off point now, the point is, I'm not cheating on you or anything like that, and I'm sorry I snuck around and lied to you, I just didn't know how to tell you about it."

"I'm so sorry, Harvey. I didn't know."

"You couldn't have known. It was a long time ago, anyway. The wounds have kind of scabbed over by now. On a more positive note, you'll be happy to know that I I'm pretty sure I officially broke up with him tonight. Told him I found this really amazing guy, and it's time for me to move on, so you don't have to worry about me sneaking off late at night anymore."

"Harvey, you know can visit him anytime you want. I don't want to stop that if it helps you."

"I did my fair share of holding on, after all these years I think it's time to finally do some letting go. I'm not going to stop going completely, I could never, but a lot less. I want to focus on the future, our future, not the past."

"That sounds like a pretty smart plan."

"Well, I'm a smart man."

"Let's not go overboard."

"Come here," Harvey said, smiling and pulling Mike up against his own body. Mike reached up and cradled a hand around the back of Harvey's head and pushed it down until Harvey's mouth collided with his. It felt good for Mike to kiss those lips with a clear mind again.

"Stars are out tonight," Harvey said when they pulled apart from the kiss.

They ended the night out on the balcony, Harvey's arms wrapped tight around Mike's waist from behind. Harvey might have been holding onto the past, even if it was just a small part of it for too long, but now he had something else to hold on to, and he didn't plan on ever letting go of this.