Rebound
by Celli Lane
***
Feedback: celli@fanfic101.com
Category: Futurefic; humor; smut.
Rating: R for smut.
Spoiler: None.
Pairing: Lex/OFC.
Summary: A sequel to "Reminders and Regrets." Lex tries to forget Clark, with...surprising results.
Archiving: Ask and I'll probably say yes.
Disclaimer: Smallville and its residents belong to Millar Gough Ink, Warner Brothers, DC Comics, and other assorted people with lawyers. Bummer.
Story note: This takes place roughly a month after the breakup scene in "Reminders and Regrets."
***
Lex Luthor and Bruce Wayne. The men that Forbes Magazine
had crowned the American Gods of Finance a few months
previous. And she was fairly certain they were telling
dirty stories.
Jayne Benedict sat a table slightly away from theirs (two
steps back when he walked, two chairs away when he sat) and
watched her boss and his--friend?--snickering together. It
made sense; despite the power, the money, and the
reputations, they were both relatively young. She supposed
it was nice to talk to someone and not be responsible for
the food on their table.
Not that she would know. She was administrative assistant
to Bruce's executive assistant, Carol, which meant she
barely saw her commander-in-chief most days. Tonight was a
special "treat." For whom, she wasn't sure.
"They're just going out to eat," Carol had said when she
told Jayne her evening plans (Budget Gourmet and ER reruns)
were suddenly being cancelled. "You need to be along in
case it turns into a business thing. But it won't."
*Right, because she wouldn't take the chance of exposing me
to actual work,* Jayne thought.
She leaned back as much as her business suit would allow
and slid a hand up to check her hair. Getting all those
curls straight enough to smooth into a bun was a pain in
the ass, and it had been holding since six that morning.
All the pulling was giving her a headache. But if she took
it down it'd be kink city. So. She unbuttoned her shirt,
just one button, *nothing too unprofessional, Carol,* and
returned to her contemplation of the money men.
Jayne sighed and tried not to think of how long it would be
until they were done exchanging prep school memoirs and she
could go home. Her PDA was in front of her, and she looked
as though she was busy with Wayne Enterprises business. In
fact, she'd just gotten her 17th high score on Snood. Go
her.
Mr. Luthor turned his head, and Jayne snapped to attention,
trying to look businesslike and professional and not bored
at all, no sir, expecting a query on a spreadsheet, or a
request for a new fork, or something. Instead, he...he
smiled at her. His gaze dropped to that one undone button,
and one eyebrow quirked up.
Jayne goggled at him.
He said something to Mr. Wayne and stood up. Jayne held
her breath as he brushed past her. But he just kept going.
The bathroom was that way. *Duh.* She sent a guilty
glance towards Mr. Wayne, but he was obliviously eating his
steak. She turned back to her PDA, opening up a work
document out of sheer guilt. She reread a spreadsheet
she'd memorized the week before. *This is boring.*
"Looks boring," someone said next to her ear, and she all
but jumped out of her chair.
"Oh! Mr. Luthor! No, it's...um..."
He laughed. Jayne could feel her knees melting. Damn the
man anyway; he already had money and good clothes, did he
really need a voice that was like sex in a bottle? She
didn't think so. But she didn't have to react like a
twelve-year-old. She ignored the voice in her head telling
her to talk business and flipped back to Snood.
"Not boring in the slightest," she said with all the
sarcasm she could command, and looked up to see a grin
flash across his face.
*Wow,* Jayne thought, but smiled back without too much
geekitude. She hoped. She started breathing again as he
walked back to his seat.
***
Jayne was still recovering from her brief encounter with
Mr. Luthor when the evening ended. She trailed her boss
back to his limo. Her Jetta was parked nearby. It was a
nice little car, or would be if it weren't in the random
proximity of a limo.
*There's a metaphor there.* She glared at the Jetta.
*Stupid metaphor. Stupid car.*
She leaned against the trunk and waited for the limo to
roar off. God forbid she leave first; Mr. Wayne might
conceive a sudden desire for last quarter's dividends at--
she checked her watch--one-frickin'-thirty in the morning,
and she'd never hear the end of it.
The sky was pretty tonight. No stars, not in Gotham, not
ever, but today's smog had turned it a lovely deep blue.
The buildings and streetlights beneath made it look vaguely
Van Gogh-ish. "Starry, starry night," she said to herself.
"Penny for your thoughts?"
She jolted. "Mr. Luthor!" She looked back towards the
limo, but it was pulling away. "Uh..."
"What are you looking at so intensely?"
"Just...the sky. Mr. Luthor, aren't you supposed to be in
the limo?"
"I told Bruce I'd walk. What about the sky?"
"Walk? In Gotham? In the middle of the night?"
He sauntered towards her, and a million Discovery Channel
specials came to mind. *The rare American billionaire
stalks its prey...* She swallowed.
He stopped a few feet from her to look back up at the sky.
"It is nice. Nothing like the Metropolis skyline. Kind of
like a Van Gogh painting."
"Yes!" She beamed at him before remembering who he was.
"Metropolis would be...more like an early Monet, maybe."
"Right. So why are you walking again?"
"I'm not." He turned the full force of his smile on her.
"I lied."
"Um...oh." *Get a grip, Jayne.* "Calling a cab? Buying a
new car? Stealing one?" she asked hopefully.
"I'm crushed. You don't want to give me a ride?"
"Mr. Luthor--"
"Lex." He held his hand out. "And I don't believe Bruce
introduced you."
"That's because he doesn't know my first name."
"Really?" He pulled his hand back.
"That's okay. He doesn't know his regular assistant's
first name either, and she's worked for him for five
years."
He thought for a second. "Carol, right?"
"Yeah," she said, surprised.
"So why doesn't he just ask her name?"
"He doesn't want to know. It's a Mr. Wayne...thing."
Mr. Luthor--Lex--*Mr. Luthor* smirked. "Yeah, I believe
that."
"Well, good. Because I have better things to lie about
than my boss's neuroses."
A startled second, and then Lex actually laughed. Jayne's
knees started to melt again. No. Bad knees! Boss's
business partner. *Stupid knees.*
"You're absolutely right." He took her hand in his. "And
now you have to tell me your name."
"Jayne. Jayne Benedict."
"A pleasure." And he actually, honest to God kissed her
hand.
Jayne swayed against the car. "Sure," she squeaked.
"Jayne, would you mind greatly giving me a ride back to my
hotel?"
*Please God, please God, pleeeease let him want to have sex
with me.* "Okay."
***
Driving was...difficult. Her Jetta was not built for size
anyway, and Mr., um, Lex tended to take up all the
available space. Jayne kept sucking in the breaths, but
she wasn't sure the oxygen was actually connecting with her
lungs.
"So," she said cheerfully, about three blocks into the
drive, "why are you hitting on me exactly?"
After a pause that had her stomach tied in even more knots,
Lex said, "Shouldn't I be?"
"Well..." Jayne smoothed her hair back. "I'm cute and
all, but you're Lex Luthor."
"I hadn't noticed."
She rolled her eyes and concentrated on shifting. Although
Armani-clad knees were beginning to take on a new eroticism
for her. She added it to the mental list of "Things to
Bring Up in Therapy" and forged ahead. "I'm just saying,
You don't seem like the kind to...ah..."
"Fuck the help?"
She accidentally shifted into second instead of fourth.
The car rocked. "Shoot! Sorry. Yeah. Um, that." When
she snuck a look over at him, he was smiling, but he didn't
truly look amused. "Just that--don't you have a European
princess on speed-dial or something?"
"The *Inquisitor* retracted that article."
"Oh."
Another long pause. Then Lex said, "You didn't really look
like the kind to expect love at first sight."
"Hell, no." She snuck another look. "Lust, though," she
said hopefully.
She could see the corners of his mouth twitching. "It was
that damned button of yours."
"My what?"
A rush of air and fabric as he moved closer, and Jayne
nearly swallowed her tongue as he flicked a finger against
her collarbone. "When you unbuttoned that button. I don't
know. It made you look..." He leaned into her, and the
breathing thing? So not happening. "Disheveled. I wanted
to dishevel you some more."
"Ohhhhh." She hoped there weren't any other cars on the
road, because she might not actually be in a lane. "Okay."
It took another mile for her brain to kick in. Okay, this
walking sex thing was nice, but she felt like a blow-up
doll. In fact, the average blow-up doll probably
contributed more to the conversation than she had. If she
was going to have a one-night stand with Lex Freaking
Luthor--and she really, really, really wanted to--then damn
it, she was going to be memorable.
The rest of the drive was very silent, but Jayne's mind was
very busy.
***
Lex allowed Jayne to precede him through the door.
She stood in the middle of the room, taking in the decor.
Lex didn't bother to follow her gaze; it was a hotel room,
who cared? He looked at her instead. She was maybe half a
foot shorter than him, respectable curves showing from
beneath a severe business suit, wavy hair hinting at the
edges of a tight auburn bun. She turned back from her
survey of the room and met his eyes. Her hands went to her
hips. Lex stifled a grin. He'd seen that expression
before...usually right before someone threw a drink at his
head.
"So, you should know something," she said.
"Drink?" He dropped the room key on the nearest flat
surface and went to find the minibar.
"Huh? No. Um, you should know something."
"You said that already." He dug out a bottle of water and
took a long swig while he loosened his tie. He saw her
blink several times, but he wasn't sure if she was staring
at the water or the tie. Hardly mattered. "I assume you
have ground rules, or some such..." Nonsense.
"Conditions?"
Her eyes narrowed. "Look, Mister--dammit, Lex," she
snapped.
He raised an eyebrow.
"You're cute. You're rich. You're sex on a stick. I get
it. Really."
Sex on a stick? If he raised his brows any further, he was
going to sprain a forehead muscle. But she just kept
going.
"I won't deny that standing next to you makes me enjoy
being a girl. But however happy you make my ovaries, I am
not going to be..." She broke off, and ran a hand through
her hair. "Convenient."
"Convenient." Lex watched her careful bun tumble around
her shoulders. God, it wasn't auburn, it was full red, and
curlier than anything. His palms itched. He ignored them.
"As opposed to what, precisely?"
"As opposed to...dammit, I sound like a moron."
"No, I liked the part about being sex on a stick."
Jayne got about half a laugh out before she stopped
herself. "Right. Right." She plopped down on the bed,
and ran her hands through her hair again. "God, this hurts
when it comes down. My point, silly as it may be, is that
you're not doing me a--a--favor. Okay? I'm in the room
too."
He crouched down next to the bed--he didn't have to go far,
the beds in these damn penthouses came almost to his hip--
and ran his finger over that undone button that had
fascinated him so in the restaurant. "So you're saying
this is mutually convenient."
"Um, yes." Her voice was shaky, but she met his eyes, and
moved deliberately as she undid the next button. "That's
exactly what I'm saying. Lex."
He dropped his hand to catch hers. "All right, then." Her
hand was small and soft, and she had chipped nail polish.
He rubbed his thumb over her knuckles. "Mutual convenience
it is."
The feel of her mouth against his was almost shocking. He
hadn't kissed anyone since--*fuck*--for a while, and the
shape of it, the taste of lipstick, the smells of perfume
and hairspray, were unnerving. He slid his hands into her
hair, feeling her wince as he brushed against tender spots
on her skull left over from the tight bun. It took
conscious effort to gentle his hands, rubbing her scalp,
and he was rewarded with a humming sound that made him
smile against her lips.
Time to dishevel her some more. Time to dishevel her a
lot.
***
A silent room. ("Why do we need music, Clark? I want you
to hear what you do to me.")
Clothes scattered next to the bed. ("Did you just tear my
shirt?" "You can buy a new one.")
A naked body beneath him.
Um.
A naked *female* body beneath him.
Fuck.
Lex dragged his brain back into the present. *Beautiful
female body, Lex. Pay attention.* He kissed her jawline,
her neck, her shoulder, scraping his teeth along her skin
until she shuddered under him. *Better,* he thought smugly.
He rocked against her--
--and both he and Jayne froze and looked down at the same
time.
"Oh dear," she said in a particularly high-pitched tone.
"If you laugh I'll--I'll--oh, *fuck,*" Lex snarled. He
pushed off her and squirmed until he was as far away from
her as he could get and still be on the bed.
"Lex?"
Regroup, regroup. Reassess the situation, refocus the
discussion...and Lionel Luthor's voice was the last thing
he needed in his head right now. "It's not you. I'm just-
-" He couldn't think of a single thing to say. Sun Tzu
never mentioned this. "This was a bad idea. You should
probably leave."
He looked pointedly out the window and waited.
"Hey. Um, Lex?"
He didn't answer.
She smacked him on the shoulder.
"Hey!" He jerked his head over to glare at her, and--she
was about an inch away, glaring back until her eyes nearly
crossed.
"I'm still here, buddy."
"Why? I can't--you know--"
"Get it up?"
"No, really. Go away." He dropped his head back down.
"Now."
"Don't make me hit you again, Luthor."
"Is it the go or the away that's not translating into your
language?"
"Do you want the little speech about how it isn't the end
of the world and you're much too manly for it to ever ever
happen again?"
"Fuck, no."
"How about the one where you're a multijillionaire and you
could buy a new dick if you had to?"
He was not going to laugh. He wasn't. He glared at her
again.
She pulled a pillow under herself--hiding an amazing pair
of breasts from view, which disappointed him on an
aesthetic level if nothing else--and balanced her chin on
her hands. "Well, *I* came for meaningless sex, and I'm
not leaving without it. So deal."
Lex made a noise that in a lesser man might have been a
laugh. He settled into his pillow, mimicking her position.
"Look, I just ended...I'd guess you'd call it a
relationship. Badly."
"Can you end a relationship well?"
He thought back. "I can't, anyway. Creatively, but not
well."
She grinned. "I like the sound of that."
"I used to," Lex said, and was disgusted at the hollowness
of his own voice. *Now you're picking up random women to
play therapist. Get a life.*
*Had one,* his subconscious replied. *Fucked it up.
Thanks for asking.*
*So what are you planning to do about it?*
He grabbed Jayne and kissed her.
"...umph!" she said. When he let her up for air, she said,
"Uh, I thought we weren't..."
"Maybe I'm not," he said. "But I still have manners." He
shoved the sheet aside. "And fingers."
"Go you," she managed before his mouth landed on hers
again.
Lex concentrated on everything about her that was new and
different and female. She had cream-colored skin, with a
line of sweat that tempted his mouth between her breasts;
she kept up a running monologue of complete nonsense
whenever her mouth wasn't busy fellating his bare head; and
the first time he licked the inside of her thigh, she
bucked off the bed so hard she clipped him on the jaw.
And surprise, surprise, eventually there was a need for the
condoms in the nightstand table after all. Sometime after
her second orgasm, Lex watched Jayne break into a grin,
heard her say something about "mutual convenience after
all," and then he slid into her, and oh God, girls were a
completely different feeling, he remembered that now.
"Damn," he said into her mouth before all verbal skills
deserted him entirely.
***
It was the lack of sound that woke Jayne up. Her usual
mornings consisted of clanging pipes from her roommate
using the bathroom, and thumps overhead from the upstairs
neighbor's kids, who apparently treated their stairs like
mogul ski jumps.
She sat up, yawning, and listened. A muffled, steady sound
that must be a nice shower. Right, a nice hotel shower.
Nice hotel room.
Sex with Lex Luthor.
Oh boy.
The shower noises stopped, and Lex came out, gloriously
naked. Not being an idiot, Jayne looked her fill.
"The bathroom's yours if you want it," he said as he walked
to the clothes laid across one chair. Navy blue briefs,
black pants, a silk shirt so light blue it was nearly gray.
"There's a hairdryer and towels in there."
A minute later, he looked up. "Jayne?"
"Huh?"
"Aren't you going to take a shower?"
Her bladder was about to explode, her mouth was so morning
breath-ed over she was sure her teeth were sticking to each
other, and her hair was wild, she could feel it. But Lex
was standing there, barefoot, those pants clinging to his
butt, that shirt untucked and unbuttoned as he fastened the
cuffs, and..."Huh?"
He laughed and crossed to the bed, dropping a kiss on her
hastily-closed lips. "Not a morning person, are you?"
While she was still blinking at him, he jerked the covers
away. "Go. Shower."
It was hard to be dignified with a half-naked billionaire
chasing your entirely-naked self into a bathroom. So Jayne
didn't even bother trying.
***
"Nice suit," Carol said.
Jayne yawned. "Huh? Oh, yeah." She looked down at the
black jacket and skirt that had magically appeared in the
bedroom while she was showering. And the deep blue blouse,
exactly the color of last night's sky. "It was a gift."
"From whom?"
"A boyyyyy," Jayne said, drawing it out until Carol
grimaced. She yawned again.
"Late night?"
*Pompous pain in the ass.* "Sort of. Mr. Luthor wanted to
explore" *my body* "some of the stockholder issues he needs
to research for this deal."
"So he asked you?"
"I was there."
Carol huffed; obviously that wasn't going to happen again.
"So, were you able to help him?"
"Well, he cleared up a lot of issues for me." Jayne hid a
snicker behind another yawn.
"Yes, but did you help *him?*"
Jayne looked over to the conference room, where she could
see Mr. Wayne and, um, Mr. Luthor passing papers back and
forth. Lex looked up; when his gaze met hers, he smiled
slightly, but only slightly. "I don't know. I tried."
A tray clattered onto the desk in front of her. "Take
their coffee in. And button that top button. You look
unprofessional."
She took the tray but left the button alone. Mr. Wayne
excused himself as she stepped into the room, but she fixed
his coffee from memory. "Cream, Mr. Luthor?"
"No, black." He lowered his voice. "I like your button."
She made sure her back was to the door and grinned at him.
"Carol hates it. She's asked me to button it three times
already this morning."
He looked over at the door, where Carol was hovering and
glaring at Jayne. "I could have her fired, you know.
Bruce owes me a favor."
Jayne rolled her eyes. "You know, most men just send
flowers the next day."
"I'm not most men."
"Yes, but no. I'll get her job on my own, thank you very
much." She handed over the coffee.
He spoke again when she was almost at the door. "Jayne.
Thank you for the coffee."
"You're welcome, Mr. Luthor."
***
Author's notes: Many, many thanks to the "real" Jayne, who
*ahem* inspired me in the first place and was kind enough
to beta her own anti-Mary Sue. And to Robin, who loves me
even though I overuse the ellipsis.
The Van Gogh painting Jayne and Lex refer to is indeed
called "Starry Night" and can be seen here:
http://www.vangoghgallery.com/painting/p_0612.htm
The "early Monet" that inspires Lex's comment looks like
this:
http://www.ibiblio.org/wm/paint/auth/monet/early/roches-
noires/roches-noires.jpg
by Celli Lane
***
Feedback: celli@fanfic101.com
Category: Futurefic; humor; smut.
Rating: R for smut.
Spoiler: None.
Pairing: Lex/OFC.
Summary: A sequel to "Reminders and Regrets." Lex tries to forget Clark, with...surprising results.
Archiving: Ask and I'll probably say yes.
Disclaimer: Smallville and its residents belong to Millar Gough Ink, Warner Brothers, DC Comics, and other assorted people with lawyers. Bummer.
Story note: This takes place roughly a month after the breakup scene in "Reminders and Regrets."
***
Lex Luthor and Bruce Wayne. The men that Forbes Magazine
had crowned the American Gods of Finance a few months
previous. And she was fairly certain they were telling
dirty stories.
Jayne Benedict sat a table slightly away from theirs (two
steps back when he walked, two chairs away when he sat) and
watched her boss and his--friend?--snickering together. It
made sense; despite the power, the money, and the
reputations, they were both relatively young. She supposed
it was nice to talk to someone and not be responsible for
the food on their table.
Not that she would know. She was administrative assistant
to Bruce's executive assistant, Carol, which meant she
barely saw her commander-in-chief most days. Tonight was a
special "treat." For whom, she wasn't sure.
"They're just going out to eat," Carol had said when she
told Jayne her evening plans (Budget Gourmet and ER reruns)
were suddenly being cancelled. "You need to be along in
case it turns into a business thing. But it won't."
*Right, because she wouldn't take the chance of exposing me
to actual work,* Jayne thought.
She leaned back as much as her business suit would allow
and slid a hand up to check her hair. Getting all those
curls straight enough to smooth into a bun was a pain in
the ass, and it had been holding since six that morning.
All the pulling was giving her a headache. But if she took
it down it'd be kink city. So. She unbuttoned her shirt,
just one button, *nothing too unprofessional, Carol,* and
returned to her contemplation of the money men.
Jayne sighed and tried not to think of how long it would be
until they were done exchanging prep school memoirs and she
could go home. Her PDA was in front of her, and she looked
as though she was busy with Wayne Enterprises business. In
fact, she'd just gotten her 17th high score on Snood. Go
her.
Mr. Luthor turned his head, and Jayne snapped to attention,
trying to look businesslike and professional and not bored
at all, no sir, expecting a query on a spreadsheet, or a
request for a new fork, or something. Instead, he...he
smiled at her. His gaze dropped to that one undone button,
and one eyebrow quirked up.
Jayne goggled at him.
He said something to Mr. Wayne and stood up. Jayne held
her breath as he brushed past her. But he just kept going.
The bathroom was that way. *Duh.* She sent a guilty
glance towards Mr. Wayne, but he was obliviously eating his
steak. She turned back to her PDA, opening up a work
document out of sheer guilt. She reread a spreadsheet
she'd memorized the week before. *This is boring.*
"Looks boring," someone said next to her ear, and she all
but jumped out of her chair.
"Oh! Mr. Luthor! No, it's...um..."
He laughed. Jayne could feel her knees melting. Damn the
man anyway; he already had money and good clothes, did he
really need a voice that was like sex in a bottle? She
didn't think so. But she didn't have to react like a
twelve-year-old. She ignored the voice in her head telling
her to talk business and flipped back to Snood.
"Not boring in the slightest," she said with all the
sarcasm she could command, and looked up to see a grin
flash across his face.
*Wow,* Jayne thought, but smiled back without too much
geekitude. She hoped. She started breathing again as he
walked back to his seat.
***
Jayne was still recovering from her brief encounter with
Mr. Luthor when the evening ended. She trailed her boss
back to his limo. Her Jetta was parked nearby. It was a
nice little car, or would be if it weren't in the random
proximity of a limo.
*There's a metaphor there.* She glared at the Jetta.
*Stupid metaphor. Stupid car.*
She leaned against the trunk and waited for the limo to
roar off. God forbid she leave first; Mr. Wayne might
conceive a sudden desire for last quarter's dividends at--
she checked her watch--one-frickin'-thirty in the morning,
and she'd never hear the end of it.
The sky was pretty tonight. No stars, not in Gotham, not
ever, but today's smog had turned it a lovely deep blue.
The buildings and streetlights beneath made it look vaguely
Van Gogh-ish. "Starry, starry night," she said to herself.
"Penny for your thoughts?"
She jolted. "Mr. Luthor!" She looked back towards the
limo, but it was pulling away. "Uh..."
"What are you looking at so intensely?"
"Just...the sky. Mr. Luthor, aren't you supposed to be in
the limo?"
"I told Bruce I'd walk. What about the sky?"
"Walk? In Gotham? In the middle of the night?"
He sauntered towards her, and a million Discovery Channel
specials came to mind. *The rare American billionaire
stalks its prey...* She swallowed.
He stopped a few feet from her to look back up at the sky.
"It is nice. Nothing like the Metropolis skyline. Kind of
like a Van Gogh painting."
"Yes!" She beamed at him before remembering who he was.
"Metropolis would be...more like an early Monet, maybe."
"Right. So why are you walking again?"
"I'm not." He turned the full force of his smile on her.
"I lied."
"Um...oh." *Get a grip, Jayne.* "Calling a cab? Buying a
new car? Stealing one?" she asked hopefully.
"I'm crushed. You don't want to give me a ride?"
"Mr. Luthor--"
"Lex." He held his hand out. "And I don't believe Bruce
introduced you."
"That's because he doesn't know my first name."
"Really?" He pulled his hand back.
"That's okay. He doesn't know his regular assistant's
first name either, and she's worked for him for five
years."
He thought for a second. "Carol, right?"
"Yeah," she said, surprised.
"So why doesn't he just ask her name?"
"He doesn't want to know. It's a Mr. Wayne...thing."
Mr. Luthor--Lex--*Mr. Luthor* smirked. "Yeah, I believe
that."
"Well, good. Because I have better things to lie about
than my boss's neuroses."
A startled second, and then Lex actually laughed. Jayne's
knees started to melt again. No. Bad knees! Boss's
business partner. *Stupid knees.*
"You're absolutely right." He took her hand in his. "And
now you have to tell me your name."
"Jayne. Jayne Benedict."
"A pleasure." And he actually, honest to God kissed her
hand.
Jayne swayed against the car. "Sure," she squeaked.
"Jayne, would you mind greatly giving me a ride back to my
hotel?"
*Please God, please God, pleeeease let him want to have sex
with me.* "Okay."
***
Driving was...difficult. Her Jetta was not built for size
anyway, and Mr., um, Lex tended to take up all the
available space. Jayne kept sucking in the breaths, but
she wasn't sure the oxygen was actually connecting with her
lungs.
"So," she said cheerfully, about three blocks into the
drive, "why are you hitting on me exactly?"
After a pause that had her stomach tied in even more knots,
Lex said, "Shouldn't I be?"
"Well..." Jayne smoothed her hair back. "I'm cute and
all, but you're Lex Luthor."
"I hadn't noticed."
She rolled her eyes and concentrated on shifting. Although
Armani-clad knees were beginning to take on a new eroticism
for her. She added it to the mental list of "Things to
Bring Up in Therapy" and forged ahead. "I'm just saying,
You don't seem like the kind to...ah..."
"Fuck the help?"
She accidentally shifted into second instead of fourth.
The car rocked. "Shoot! Sorry. Yeah. Um, that." When
she snuck a look over at him, he was smiling, but he didn't
truly look amused. "Just that--don't you have a European
princess on speed-dial or something?"
"The *Inquisitor* retracted that article."
"Oh."
Another long pause. Then Lex said, "You didn't really look
like the kind to expect love at first sight."
"Hell, no." She snuck another look. "Lust, though," she
said hopefully.
She could see the corners of his mouth twitching. "It was
that damned button of yours."
"My what?"
A rush of air and fabric as he moved closer, and Jayne
nearly swallowed her tongue as he flicked a finger against
her collarbone. "When you unbuttoned that button. I don't
know. It made you look..." He leaned into her, and the
breathing thing? So not happening. "Disheveled. I wanted
to dishevel you some more."
"Ohhhhh." She hoped there weren't any other cars on the
road, because she might not actually be in a lane. "Okay."
It took another mile for her brain to kick in. Okay, this
walking sex thing was nice, but she felt like a blow-up
doll. In fact, the average blow-up doll probably
contributed more to the conversation than she had. If she
was going to have a one-night stand with Lex Freaking
Luthor--and she really, really, really wanted to--then damn
it, she was going to be memorable.
The rest of the drive was very silent, but Jayne's mind was
very busy.
***
Lex allowed Jayne to precede him through the door.
She stood in the middle of the room, taking in the decor.
Lex didn't bother to follow her gaze; it was a hotel room,
who cared? He looked at her instead. She was maybe half a
foot shorter than him, respectable curves showing from
beneath a severe business suit, wavy hair hinting at the
edges of a tight auburn bun. She turned back from her
survey of the room and met his eyes. Her hands went to her
hips. Lex stifled a grin. He'd seen that expression
before...usually right before someone threw a drink at his
head.
"So, you should know something," she said.
"Drink?" He dropped the room key on the nearest flat
surface and went to find the minibar.
"Huh? No. Um, you should know something."
"You said that already." He dug out a bottle of water and
took a long swig while he loosened his tie. He saw her
blink several times, but he wasn't sure if she was staring
at the water or the tie. Hardly mattered. "I assume you
have ground rules, or some such..." Nonsense.
"Conditions?"
Her eyes narrowed. "Look, Mister--dammit, Lex," she
snapped.
He raised an eyebrow.
"You're cute. You're rich. You're sex on a stick. I get
it. Really."
Sex on a stick? If he raised his brows any further, he was
going to sprain a forehead muscle. But she just kept
going.
"I won't deny that standing next to you makes me enjoy
being a girl. But however happy you make my ovaries, I am
not going to be..." She broke off, and ran a hand through
her hair. "Convenient."
"Convenient." Lex watched her careful bun tumble around
her shoulders. God, it wasn't auburn, it was full red, and
curlier than anything. His palms itched. He ignored them.
"As opposed to what, precisely?"
"As opposed to...dammit, I sound like a moron."
"No, I liked the part about being sex on a stick."
Jayne got about half a laugh out before she stopped
herself. "Right. Right." She plopped down on the bed,
and ran her hands through her hair again. "God, this hurts
when it comes down. My point, silly as it may be, is that
you're not doing me a--a--favor. Okay? I'm in the room
too."
He crouched down next to the bed--he didn't have to go far,
the beds in these damn penthouses came almost to his hip--
and ran his finger over that undone button that had
fascinated him so in the restaurant. "So you're saying
this is mutually convenient."
"Um, yes." Her voice was shaky, but she met his eyes, and
moved deliberately as she undid the next button. "That's
exactly what I'm saying. Lex."
He dropped his hand to catch hers. "All right, then." Her
hand was small and soft, and she had chipped nail polish.
He rubbed his thumb over her knuckles. "Mutual convenience
it is."
The feel of her mouth against his was almost shocking. He
hadn't kissed anyone since--*fuck*--for a while, and the
shape of it, the taste of lipstick, the smells of perfume
and hairspray, were unnerving. He slid his hands into her
hair, feeling her wince as he brushed against tender spots
on her skull left over from the tight bun. It took
conscious effort to gentle his hands, rubbing her scalp,
and he was rewarded with a humming sound that made him
smile against her lips.
Time to dishevel her some more. Time to dishevel her a
lot.
***
A silent room. ("Why do we need music, Clark? I want you
to hear what you do to me.")
Clothes scattered next to the bed. ("Did you just tear my
shirt?" "You can buy a new one.")
A naked body beneath him.
Um.
A naked *female* body beneath him.
Fuck.
Lex dragged his brain back into the present. *Beautiful
female body, Lex. Pay attention.* He kissed her jawline,
her neck, her shoulder, scraping his teeth along her skin
until she shuddered under him. *Better,* he thought smugly.
He rocked against her--
--and both he and Jayne froze and looked down at the same
time.
"Oh dear," she said in a particularly high-pitched tone.
"If you laugh I'll--I'll--oh, *fuck,*" Lex snarled. He
pushed off her and squirmed until he was as far away from
her as he could get and still be on the bed.
"Lex?"
Regroup, regroup. Reassess the situation, refocus the
discussion...and Lionel Luthor's voice was the last thing
he needed in his head right now. "It's not you. I'm just-
-" He couldn't think of a single thing to say. Sun Tzu
never mentioned this. "This was a bad idea. You should
probably leave."
He looked pointedly out the window and waited.
"Hey. Um, Lex?"
He didn't answer.
She smacked him on the shoulder.
"Hey!" He jerked his head over to glare at her, and--she
was about an inch away, glaring back until her eyes nearly
crossed.
"I'm still here, buddy."
"Why? I can't--you know--"
"Get it up?"
"No, really. Go away." He dropped his head back down.
"Now."
"Don't make me hit you again, Luthor."
"Is it the go or the away that's not translating into your
language?"
"Do you want the little speech about how it isn't the end
of the world and you're much too manly for it to ever ever
happen again?"
"Fuck, no."
"How about the one where you're a multijillionaire and you
could buy a new dick if you had to?"
He was not going to laugh. He wasn't. He glared at her
again.
She pulled a pillow under herself--hiding an amazing pair
of breasts from view, which disappointed him on an
aesthetic level if nothing else--and balanced her chin on
her hands. "Well, *I* came for meaningless sex, and I'm
not leaving without it. So deal."
Lex made a noise that in a lesser man might have been a
laugh. He settled into his pillow, mimicking her position.
"Look, I just ended...I'd guess you'd call it a
relationship. Badly."
"Can you end a relationship well?"
He thought back. "I can't, anyway. Creatively, but not
well."
She grinned. "I like the sound of that."
"I used to," Lex said, and was disgusted at the hollowness
of his own voice. *Now you're picking up random women to
play therapist. Get a life.*
*Had one,* his subconscious replied. *Fucked it up.
Thanks for asking.*
*So what are you planning to do about it?*
He grabbed Jayne and kissed her.
"...umph!" she said. When he let her up for air, she said,
"Uh, I thought we weren't..."
"Maybe I'm not," he said. "But I still have manners." He
shoved the sheet aside. "And fingers."
"Go you," she managed before his mouth landed on hers
again.
Lex concentrated on everything about her that was new and
different and female. She had cream-colored skin, with a
line of sweat that tempted his mouth between her breasts;
she kept up a running monologue of complete nonsense
whenever her mouth wasn't busy fellating his bare head; and
the first time he licked the inside of her thigh, she
bucked off the bed so hard she clipped him on the jaw.
And surprise, surprise, eventually there was a need for the
condoms in the nightstand table after all. Sometime after
her second orgasm, Lex watched Jayne break into a grin,
heard her say something about "mutual convenience after
all," and then he slid into her, and oh God, girls were a
completely different feeling, he remembered that now.
"Damn," he said into her mouth before all verbal skills
deserted him entirely.
***
It was the lack of sound that woke Jayne up. Her usual
mornings consisted of clanging pipes from her roommate
using the bathroom, and thumps overhead from the upstairs
neighbor's kids, who apparently treated their stairs like
mogul ski jumps.
She sat up, yawning, and listened. A muffled, steady sound
that must be a nice shower. Right, a nice hotel shower.
Nice hotel room.
Sex with Lex Luthor.
Oh boy.
The shower noises stopped, and Lex came out, gloriously
naked. Not being an idiot, Jayne looked her fill.
"The bathroom's yours if you want it," he said as he walked
to the clothes laid across one chair. Navy blue briefs,
black pants, a silk shirt so light blue it was nearly gray.
"There's a hairdryer and towels in there."
A minute later, he looked up. "Jayne?"
"Huh?"
"Aren't you going to take a shower?"
Her bladder was about to explode, her mouth was so morning
breath-ed over she was sure her teeth were sticking to each
other, and her hair was wild, she could feel it. But Lex
was standing there, barefoot, those pants clinging to his
butt, that shirt untucked and unbuttoned as he fastened the
cuffs, and..."Huh?"
He laughed and crossed to the bed, dropping a kiss on her
hastily-closed lips. "Not a morning person, are you?"
While she was still blinking at him, he jerked the covers
away. "Go. Shower."
It was hard to be dignified with a half-naked billionaire
chasing your entirely-naked self into a bathroom. So Jayne
didn't even bother trying.
***
"Nice suit," Carol said.
Jayne yawned. "Huh? Oh, yeah." She looked down at the
black jacket and skirt that had magically appeared in the
bedroom while she was showering. And the deep blue blouse,
exactly the color of last night's sky. "It was a gift."
"From whom?"
"A boyyyyy," Jayne said, drawing it out until Carol
grimaced. She yawned again.
"Late night?"
*Pompous pain in the ass.* "Sort of. Mr. Luthor wanted to
explore" *my body* "some of the stockholder issues he needs
to research for this deal."
"So he asked you?"
"I was there."
Carol huffed; obviously that wasn't going to happen again.
"So, were you able to help him?"
"Well, he cleared up a lot of issues for me." Jayne hid a
snicker behind another yawn.
"Yes, but did you help *him?*"
Jayne looked over to the conference room, where she could
see Mr. Wayne and, um, Mr. Luthor passing papers back and
forth. Lex looked up; when his gaze met hers, he smiled
slightly, but only slightly. "I don't know. I tried."
A tray clattered onto the desk in front of her. "Take
their coffee in. And button that top button. You look
unprofessional."
She took the tray but left the button alone. Mr. Wayne
excused himself as she stepped into the room, but she fixed
his coffee from memory. "Cream, Mr. Luthor?"
"No, black." He lowered his voice. "I like your button."
She made sure her back was to the door and grinned at him.
"Carol hates it. She's asked me to button it three times
already this morning."
He looked over at the door, where Carol was hovering and
glaring at Jayne. "I could have her fired, you know.
Bruce owes me a favor."
Jayne rolled her eyes. "You know, most men just send
flowers the next day."
"I'm not most men."
"Yes, but no. I'll get her job on my own, thank you very
much." She handed over the coffee.
He spoke again when she was almost at the door. "Jayne.
Thank you for the coffee."
"You're welcome, Mr. Luthor."
***
Author's notes: Many, many thanks to the "real" Jayne, who
*ahem* inspired me in the first place and was kind enough
to beta her own anti-Mary Sue. And to Robin, who loves me
even though I overuse the ellipsis.
The Van Gogh painting Jayne and Lex refer to is indeed
called "Starry Night" and can be seen here:
http://www.vangoghgallery.com/painting/p_0612.htm
The "early Monet" that inspires Lex's comment looks like
this:
http://www.ibiblio.org/wm/paint/auth/monet/early/roches-
noires/roches-noires.jpg
