So this is just a cute little Clace one shot we wrote to make up for the fact that we literally never update. So we procrastinated writing our other stories by writing this instead to make up for not writing out other stories. Makes sense right?

Jace winked at the customer. "Would you like some sugar with that McChicken, ma'am?"

The woman looked confused. "Who would put sugar on a chicken sandwich?"

"No, I meant… like, do you want some sugar," he winked, "with that McChicken?"

The woman still looked confused. "I don't understand, is there something special about this sugar?"

Before Jace could say anything he was pushed away from the register and replaced by a small redhead. She took the money from the woman and bid her a good day.

"What the hell was that?" Jace grumbled. "I almost had that!"

"Really?" Clary smirked, pulling out the woman's number. "Cuz I'm pretty sure she's a lesbian."

Jace rolled his eyes. "You just wanted to steal my thunder."

"Nope," she popped the P. "I'm your boss, Jasshole. You can't be flirting with the customers. It's bad for business."

"This is McDonalds," Jace complained. "It doesn't matter how many phone numbers I get, the fat people will just keep coming!"

Clary scoffed. "That's seriously offensive," she said, glancing at the customers, hoping they didn't hear anything, "You can't just say stuff like that."

"Just because it's offensive doesn't mean it's not true!"

"You're such a cock-eater." Clary ground her teeth together, trying to keep her voice at a whisper.

"Yeah, well you're a ginger!"

"Very observant Herondale. What are you going to point out next? My luminous green eyes? My glowing skin? My perfect ass? Does any of this sound familiar?"

Jace shook his head. "No, and I don't know why you would say your skin is glowing. You're pasty. And your ass is mediocre at best."

"I'm quoting you, you fudge bar."

"Oh, that makes sense." Jace slapped his own ass and walked away.

"Can you believe them?" Isabelle asked, leaning closer to Magnus as he tossed more fries into the frier. "They're so in love and they can't even admit it."

"I don't think it's love." Magnus ate some fries from a customer's order. "I think it's sexual tension. That will eventually turn into love. But for now, they both just need a good fucking."

"I think I have an idea," Isabelle giggled. She leaned in to whisper in Magnus's ear.

"That's genius!"

OoOoOoO

Jace once again dropped his fork, bending over seductively to pick it up.

"Can you please stop waving your ass in my face?"

"Don't lie. You love it. The Bend and Snap always works." Jace shot up violently with his hands pressed to his boobs.

There was no one but them in the entire restaurant. Which made sense, since it was 3am. People didn't tend to crave fake hamburger this close to dawn.

"And it's not my fault I'm just such a klutz," he said, dropping his fork again, this time much closer to Clary, so when he bent over his ass was pressed up against her.

"Ugh," Clary pushed him away. "Can you at least try not to give me a lap dance? We're at work." Clary walked over to the freezer to get more fries, mostly just to get away from Jace. But he followed her. Of course.

"Most women would be lining up to touch this amazing ass. I'm surprised you didn't cream yourself." Jace winked at her, leaning up against one of the shelves in the freezer.

"You are honestly the most obnoxious person I have ever- wait why is there a sleeping bag in here?"

Clary took a moment to look around the small room. Aside from the usual shelves full of frozen food, there was an unrolled sleeping bag on the floor with one pillow and rose petals spread across the floor. From the ceiling and shelves hung colorful christmas lights that twinkled like stars. There were fake candles spread out everywhere on the ground.

"Is this for a marriage proposal? Jace, you're only 17."

"I didn't do this."

"Then who-"

The door shut behind them.

"Isabelle…" Jace grumbled, turning towards the door.

Clary was already pushing at the door, trying to open it.

"Move aside, weakling. Let the man handle this," Jace said, flexing.

Clary rolled her eyes and moved aside so that Jace could push at the door. And he did. For several minutes. Nothing happened.

"Wow, glad I moved aside so the man could open the big, heavy door for me," Clary said, sounding dead inside. She sat down on the sleeping bag, pulling out her phone. "There's no signal in here," she mumbled.

"Then I guess there's only one thing to do," Jace whispered, looking at Clary seductively.

"Please don't suggest sex or anything close to that," Clary grumbled, leaning her back against a small cooler that sat against the back wall.

"I was going to suggest we cover ourselves in hot sauce to keep warm, but your idea is way better." Jace slid down next to her, crawling like a cat. Clary kicked him in the face..

Jace yelped, holding his face and clearly trying not to cry. What a pussy.

"Hey, what's that?" Jace asked, after finally overcoming the need to be a little bitch. He pointed to something behind Clary.

"It's a cooler, you jaceass."

"Yeah, but why would there be a cooler in a freezer?"

Clary pulled the cooler from behind her and opened it. At the very top was an envelope labeled Love Izzy and Maggie 333.

Jesus fucking christ.

Clary tore the letter opened and read it outloud for Jace to hear.

"Dear Jace and Clary, we are sick of you two idiots not getting along. All the yelling makes me sad and I just want you two to be best friends and love each other as much as we love you. I told Magnus to put this letter in a box with all the things you need like food and hats and such. Please try and talk it out. Xoxo, Izzy."

She signed it with about four million hearts at the bottom and a drawing of what looked like Jace and Clary playing chess together.

Clary turned the page and read outloud.

"Dear Biscuit and the Blond Butthole, there is a lot of tension between you two and it's time to work it out. I packed the cooler with everything you'll need like food and hats. And such. Please remember to be respectful of one another. Many kisses, Magnus.

P.S. The next letter is addressed to Jace only."

Clary rolled her eyes and handed the last page of the letter to Jace. He took it from her and read it quickly, his face turning red as he did.

"What does it say?" Clary asked, leaning over to see the letter.

Jace pulled away from her quickly, standing to place the letter on the top shelf of the freezer. "It's nothing," he said, sitting back down next to her. "Just Alec telling me to be nice to you."

Clary rolled her eyes, deciding to ignore the obvious lie, and looked down at the remaining contents of the cooler. Inside were two happy meals, (because that would totally be enough food for two teenagers,) hats with cute little pompoms on it, (Clary giggled and put one on immediately, looking so fucking adorable,) and under all that, a mountain of condoms.

"Oh god," Clary mumbled pushing the cooler away from her in disgust.

"What is it?" Jace asked, looking over at the cooler. "Oh," he smirked. "Well, I was already packing, but it's nice to know that there's more just in case." He took three condoms out of his back pocket and dropped them into the cooler.

Clary scoffed. "You're such a pig," she said, standing. "Why do you always have to make everything so sexual? Did you really think you'd get lucky with the McChicken Lesbian?"

"How was I supposed to know she liked girls? Not everyone has such amazing gaydar, Ginger!"

"Well maybe if you didn't try to stick your dick in anything with a hole, it would be easier for you to get to know people!"

"I've been trying to get to know you but you always just push me away!"

"I don't push you away, you push me away with all of your sexual innuendos! Why do you want to have sex so badly anyway?"

Jace rolled his eyes. "Uh, have you ever had sex before?"

"Yes, twice."

"With who?" Jace suddenly sounded very offended.

"It's really none of your business," Clary said, crossing her arms.

"It was Sebastian, wasn't it?"

Clary exhaled. "Yeah."

"Seriously? You let that man whore pop your cherry?"

"Don't be such a hypocrite, you slut!"

Jace rolled his eyes. "I'm not a slut! Just because that's what everyone says about me doesn't mean…" He didn't finish his sentence. Jace could feel his face heating up.

"Holy shit… You mean you're a-"

Jace didn't let her finish. He pulled her close and pressed her lips to his.

OoOoOoO

Isabelle stood from her seat and started pacing nervously. "Magnus, I think we should check on them. What if they need blankets? What if Clary ate Jace to survive?"

Magnus rolled his eyes. "I'm sure there's nothing to worry about."

"But how do we know they're ok?"

Magnus stood and walked towards the freezer. He leaned against the door and pressed his ear against the cold metal. He smirked. "Oh, they're more than ok."

OoOoOoO

Jace sighed into Clary's soft red hair. "That was amazing," he mumbled, kissing her neck.

"But Jace, I feel bad about this." Clary turned away from him, but he just pulled her closer. There really wasn't much room in the small sleeping bag anyway, so it's not like she could really go anywhere.

"Why would you feel bad?" He said, stroking her cheek and kissing her tenderly. "Was it really that bad?" he asked quietly, embarrassed.

"What?" she turned towards him, so their noses were touching. "Of course not. That was pretty good for your first time. But… it was your first time."

"Yeah, so?" Jace tried to hide his smile as he kissed her again.

Clary pushed him away lightly so she could talk. "So, obviously you were saving it for someone special. There were so many girls lining up, that's the only reason I could think you've waited this long."

Jace just shook his head, pulling Clary closer and nuzzling his head into her shoulder. "Don't worry about it."

Clary wrapped her arms around him. "Well, this is an interesting way to start a friendship," she giggled, stretching. She tilted her head, trying to ease the pain in her neck, and spotted a piece of paper lying on the ground beside her. It was the letter addressed to Jace. It must have fallen from the top shelf while they were…

"Oh, yeah, friends, "Jace mumbled, seeming not to notice when Clary picked up the letter. "About that…" he continued. "There's something I've been meaning to tell you."

"'Jace, I know you've always been in love with Clary,'" Clary read.

Jace's eyes snapped open. He snatched the letter from her hand, crumpling it really small, and shoved it in his mouth. "Roo ran rea iss," he said around the paper.

"Jace, give me the paper." Clary stuck her hand into Jace's mouth and ripped the page out, now covered in his spit. She didn't even bother to uncrumple it. "You're in love with me?"

"Oh, don't give me that look. You think I like being in love with someone who hates me? You think it's easy to some to work every day and just want to have a nice conversation with you, but all you do is yell at me? You think it's fun for me to see you in that damn hat and think it is the most adorable thing I have ever seen in my life? Do you think it was fun watching you date that asshole Sebastian? I know it's stupid for me to feel this way, so stop looking at me like I'm some disgusting piece of shit."

"Jace, I didn't know," Clary mumbled.

"Yeah, well you were the only one."

"Well maybe if you had told me-"

"I did! Several times! I sent you flowers last week with a note that said 'I love you, From Jace,' and I just watched you throw them in the trash!"

"I thought it was a joke from Isabelle!" Clary yelled, moving as far away from Jace as the sleeping bag would allow.

"Why would it be a joke from Isabelle?"

"Because I love you too, ok?"

"YEAH WELL MAYBE IF YOU- Wait, really?"

Clary blushed. "Yeah."

Jace rolled his eyes. "Then what the fuck are we doing?"

OoOoOoO

Stephen opened his car door and ran towards the 24hr McDonalds, not bothering to lock his car. He opened the door and walked towards the kid with blue spiky hair that stood behind the counter.

"Where the hell is my child," he demanded.

"Oh hey, Mr. Herondale," said a small girl with long black hair. She came out from the kitchen, holding a half empty order of french fries.

"Where is Jace," he said again, this time more sternly.

Isabelle smiled. "He's in the freezer."

"WHAT?"

"With Clary," Magnus added.

"You have my attention," Stephen said, hopping the counter and walking towards the back where he knew the freezer would have been.

Once he reached the large metal door, he didn't hesitate to fling it open.

"Jonathan, get off that girl this instant. I thought I taught you better than to fuck a girl in a freezer."

Jace and Clary stared up at him, wide eyes and very clearly afraid.

"You two have one minute to get dressed and get out here before I come back in here and get you myself, no matter how clothed you are. I will be timing you," Stephen said, walking backwards out of the freezer, closing the door behind him. Once he was out, he looked down at his watch and waited.

At 38 seconds, the two emerged, fully clothed, (though Clary's shirt was on inside out and Jace was in only his shirt and underwear.)

"Jace, what the hell were you thinking? I can't believe you would shame our family like this. Haven't I taught you better than this? You should be ashamed of yourself." He turned to Clary. "You should get home before your parents notice how late you are." Clary blushed and ran off in the opposite direction of the door, then turned around and ran the other way. Once she was gone, Stephen finally allowed himself to smile. "Ooh, Jace has a girlfriend!" He said, nudging his son. "You loooooooove heeeerrrrrrrrr!"

"Dad, what the fuck."

"Yeah shut up, I need to make a phone call." Stephen pulled out his phone and dialed quickly. He held the phone to his ear and waited for someone to pick up. "Yo Val, you owe me 20 bucks."

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xoxo

-R&A