You watch them (like you have a choice) and so does Felix, though you're pretty sure he's watching you more than them. He's pretending to watch them, but he's side eyeing you the whole time, just waiting for you to crack. Oh, he'd claim it was because it hurt too much, that he couldn't stand to see Amy and… her… not with how he feels about her, not with how much she means to him. But that's just so much Felix bullshit (the bullshit of a rationalizer, of someone who's spent a lifetime - no matter how short - finding one plausible reason, one believable excuse after another for the most obvious of things.)

Fuck, it's no wonder you're friends.

You're watching them and he's watching you and you know what's running through his mind, you know exactly what he's thinking. He should be thinking 'I told you so' cause… well… he did, he told you so, and you both know it. But he's not because that's not who Felix is, no matter how much you think he'd like to be.

"We should go," he whispers and yup, you knew it. He's thinking of you, he's thinking of everything he sees etched across your face as you watch them from the bushes, he's thinking of your pain because that's who he is and that's who you are too, right? The one who always thinks of others.

Of her.

"Karma," he whispers again and you almost want to ask why the fuck he's being so quiet because, let's face it, there's no way either of them are going to hear you. Sabrina's too busy spinning her… she's too busy telling Amy everything she wants to hear and Amy's too busy lapping it all up, taking it all in, buying every fucking word of it.

He puts a hand on your arm and you flinch, snatching it away and jostling the branches and for a second, for the splittest of splits, you think Amy hears it, you think she's going to look your way but then the moment's gone and she's never so much as glanced at you.

Well… that's not exactly right. She's looked your way for years. You just never thought she'd stop.

Felix scoots closer and you manage not to pull away. "Karma, we need to go," he says. "This is about them, not us and we really need to -"

You put a hand in his face and, if you were him, you'd probably grab that hand and drag him, kicking and screaming, out of the bushes and down the sidewalk and around the corner and anywhere that was away from here. Lauren would do it. Shane and Liam too. But not Felix. He just settles back into his place and watches you watch them and doesn't say he told you so, though he sure as fuck could. He saw this coming after all. He was the one who tried to talk you out of it, he was the one who said it wasn't a good idea.

And that's not exactly right, either. He didn't say it wasn't a good idea.

"This is a horrible idea," he said. "This is a horrifically dumb fucking idea."

It was the first time you'd ever heard him swear which, at the time, struck you as slightly… weird. He's a teenage alcoholic with a dead mother and a father who's turned overbearing into an art form. If you were him, you'd be swearing as a matter of course.

Of course, if you were him, you would've known he was right. This was (is) a horrifically dumb fucking idea (and you've had your share of those, so you would know.) Felix, for all his faults (and you like him, really you do, but let's face it, the boy's dry toast with balls - maybe - and enough baggage to make you look normal) at least knew that, he figured that out long before you did.

"You've done enough, don't you think?" he asked. "Don't you think showing Amy the pictures and… outing… Sabrina was enough?"

There was a tone, at least the hint of one (and you're pretty sure hints are the closest Felix ever comes to real feelings without a drink in his hand) (and yes, you know that's a fucking shit thing to think) (and it's also true, so there's that) rippling just under the surface of his words and if you hadn't been so intent on your plan, if you hadn't been so single minded about making sure Amy was OK (because that's what it was, right? your plan?) you might have taken him to task for it, you might have chewed his vanilla fucking ass up right then and there.

You were doing it all for him, after all. For him and Amy and their happiness because, let's face it, Felix was what Amy needed.

Who Amy needed (and no, you didn't spend a whole lot of time thinking about who Amy wanted because you'd seen the pics, the proof of Sabrina Straight - because once straight, always straight, right? - and so wanting was not an appropriate part of the equation anymore.)

"Maybe you've never had a friend who's meant to you what Amy means to me," you told him, never once slowing down, never once breaking stride as you walked along the sidewalk you'd walked a thousand times and turned the corner you'd turned a thousand more. "So maybe you can't understand this, but when it comes to someone you… when it comes to your soulmate, there's no such thing as enough."

You'd kept walking and he'd stopped, right there in the middle of the street, and you didn't pause or even slow down because you knew he'd follow, you knew he had to. He could protest all he wanted, but in the end?

He was (is) in love with her. And in the end? Love makes us all do dumb things. Horrifically dumb things, to be exact.

Things like ending up in the bushes (which wasn't the plan) watching and waiting to see how it all plays out (which wasn't the plan, either), surprised that Sabrina even stays, surprised she has the balls (maybe more than Felix) to even try to explain and even more surprised that Amy lets her.

And that's when you get it. Right about now. Right about the moment Sabrina calls out for her, right about the time you're thinking walk away Amy, just walk and Amy, apparently, is thinking that maybe she should stop walking (no, no, no) and that maybe she should turn around and maybe she should get that look.

You know that look.

You hate that look.

And that's not exactly (or even close) to right, either. You love that look. You've loved that look for years, you've loved it every time you've ever seen it because you know it.

Know it?

You fucking created it.

Without you, that look wouldn't exist. Without you, there'd never have been a need to Amy's face to do… that. To twist and contort and look like she can't decide between crying and laughing and cursing the fucking world. The look of someone who's so mad they can't possibly feel anything else cause there's simply no room at the fucking feelings inn except this is Amy and years and years (and years) of being your best friend has, if nothing else, taught her to feel more than one thing, to be the fucking multiplex of emotions.

How many times? How many times have you seen that look when she's been furious with you because another one of your plans has blown up in her face and she's wanted (so fucking badly) to hate you but it's you and you meant well (you always do) and it's you and there's really no harm done (there never is) (well… almost never) and it's you and fuck all…

It's you.

It's you and it's her and that look… it's yours.

It was.

Felix knew. He knew from the very beginning and you don't know if he's got some sort of drunken fool ESP (except he's sober) or if Amy told him something (like she'd tell him anything she wouldn't tell you) or if maybe he just listened when she did (and that couldn't…. Well… OK… so maybe…) but somehow he knew.

He fucking knew.

"I saw the pictures," Amy says and you cheer a little (inside) and think, for just a moment that Felix can take what he knew and shove it up his bland little ass. "You and that… guy."

Sabrina nods and you'll give her credit (very very little) for that. At least she doesn't try to lie her way out of it. "He was my boyfriend," she says and you can see Amy recoil at the word (and no, you don't think, even for a second, about Liam Booker is my first boyfriend). "I dated him for about a year before I moved here."

Amy nods and stands her ground and you're sorta oddly proud of her for listening.

Even if all you really want her to do is run.

"He was a great guy," Sabrina says and Felix groans next to you. He's probably heard that phrase a few times in his life. "And I… I wanted him." It's all you can do to not rush from the bushes and grab Amy right then and there. "I wanted him…." she says. "I wanted him to be what I wanted."

Wait. What?

Sabrina takes a halting step toward Amy and Amy doesn't back away and that's so not the plan, not even a little. "Everything Karma told you was true," she says. "Every picture she showed you, every thing she found out about me and him… all true."

Damn right.

"Except…"

No. No except. The facts are the facts are the fucking facts.

She moves a little closer and even in the dim light you can see that look, it's still there. "Every time I kissed him, every time I touched him, every time… I felt empty. Wrong. It felt… physically it was… OK? But inside…" Sabrina shakes her head. "I thought it was just me. I thought it was something about me, that maybe when I really loved someone… that he just wasn't the guy for me."

Amy reaches out a hand and you watch (oh, fuck, why do you watch?) as her thumb wipes a tear from the other girl's cheek. "And me?" she asks and you can hear the hope in her voice and that wasn't the plan either.

"I thought I was straight," Sabrina says. "I never even… and then there was you and… I didn't know what to think anymore, but I knew what I felt… what I feel. And it's not empty and it's not wrong and I'm sorry I didn't tell you but -"

Amy's lips cut her off and it's short and hard and it's not love and maybe, just maybe…

But then she takes a step back and you can see that look on her face and yeah, you know that look even if you were drunk and wet and so fucking confused the last time you saw it.

You turn away before Sabrina moves, before she cups Amy's cheeks in her hands and before it it's anything but short and hard and before it's so obviously

"Enough."

"What?" Felix whispers.

"Enough," you say. "That's enough."