Dear Readers,
First of all, I'd like to say that Crossroads II is my very first fiction (fan fiction or otherwise). I have never written anything before and had no intentions of ever writing... Until... oh well, it's all thanks to Rosa... ;) It's nearly been eight months since I came across and found her story. I was bitterly disappointed that it hadn't continued and I found myself crying out for more (no doubt some of you felt the same?) The very next day to my surprise, I experienced something very weird indeed; believe it or not, I found myself immersed in some sort of a parallel universe with Candy, Albert, Annie, Archie, Patty, George and all the others as real people. The ideas of how Rosa's wonderful story could have continued just kept playing in my head, it haunted me in my sleep and in every waking moment 24/7... and that's how the first five chapters of the continuation were born.
So, thank you so much, Rosa, for your story. Thanks to you I was transported to a wonderful world and experienced amazing feelings of ups and downs throughout your story. My mind was taken, I was inspired (or, should I say, nearly possessed!) and I have never felt so alive! Thank you, darling!
Secondly, I also would like to say a big 'thank you' to my Logan, for his editing and also for his unbelievable patience with me, leaving temporarily in two separate universes.
Also, a big 'thanks' for my little son, for inspiring me with his never ending childish curiosity. He reminds me everyday how not to lose the ability of discovering The New and Exciting...
With this done, I give you "Crossroads II". Before you start reading, please note again that this is a direct CONTINUATION of Rosa Carmona's "Crossroads" and ideally you should read her part first. Otherwise, some plots and subplots won't make much sense and you might feel like you have jumped into the middle of the book... This is the link you should follow (removing the space between each word!): http: / www . fanfiction . net / s / 228969/1/Crossroads
For those who already read it, a quick summary of the story so far...
After being rejected and witnessing the encounter Candy with Terry, Albert leaves for Lakewood. There he tries to deal with a bitter reality: Candy will never love him the way he would want her to. And upon accepting the invitation to Weston's summer residence he meets again Jolie McPherson, a woman at least say intriguing...
In a meantime, while Albert is gone, Candy begins to realize her blindness. She is hurt even more when the chat with Patty confirms her suspicion about Albert's true feelings towards her. But however determined to talk to Albert honestly, she isn't aware of one thing: Albert is planning to leave to Africa again...
But... let them speak for themselves. Let the story continue...
PART TWO
CHAPTER ONE: THE CHANGES
Chicago, 18th June 1921
'My Dear Candy' she read, 'I am leaving Chicago. I will be gone for a while. I cannot tell you how long just yet but by the time you read this, I will be already on my way to Africa. I am going to join the zoological mission in Congo.
You do not need to worry; I have taken care of everything. The business will be fine; I left Monty in charge of all the issues. Hannah also knows what to do around the house and George will maintain our correspondence.
Please, take care of yourself and enjoy your life. I have opened a personal bank account for you. George will instruct you on how to use it. The money I deposited there is for your personal use and you can spend it as you wish. I also have taken the liberty of organizing some issues regarding Pony's Home. George will tell you all the details.
Please forgive me for not letting you know earlier; goodbyes were never my strong point.
Yours, Albert'
"How could you Albert, how could you!" she sobbed angrily, scrunching up the letter in one hand and banging her other fist against her desk. "I don't care about the money; it's you who I need, don't you understand? How could you! How could you do this to me again? We were supposed to talk!"
Since he came back from Lakewood the week before, she had sensed tension within him. He was very quiet, strangely distant and appeared to be completely indifferent to her uneasy mood. Following her own burning need, she wanted to talk to him about everything, what happened at the party and about the letter he had left for her but he didn't give her a chance for it. To her surprise he didn't mention a word about her own short note she had sent to him, as if it never even existed. They used to share nearly everything but she noticed with hurt in her heart that this time he was preoccupied with something he didn't wish to share with her. He actually seemed so unattainable and so cold that she simply ran out of her initial courage and decided to wait few more days, convinced that she will have a better opportunity to talk to him once his weird mood wanes. And only today, after she had read the letter that George had brought to her room, she realized that she had made a wrong decision.
Why didn't I notice anything earlier? She accused herself. I was cowardly waiting and now I have to pay for it… Now it's all lost… No, no! It occurred to her suddenly. Maybe it's not too late yet! Maybe I can still find him!
Candy stood up rapidly, threw the scrunched letter on her bed and as if she was carried by invisible forces, she furiously ran downstairs after George. She found him. He was just about to leave the mansion but she stopped him at the door and nearly dragged him to the study room. There, still with tears in her eyes she begged him to tell her what ship Albert was going to leave on for Africa. Knowing his loyalty to Albert she expected a great resistance from him but George surprised her, he did not have any objections in revealing the information she required.
Encouraged by this initial success, without wasting a second she made a long distance phone call to New York. Even though her body was all trembling from impatience, at the same time her mind was for some reason crystal clear and at full gear and while she was waiting for the Chicago telephone-exchange to forward the call, all the pieces of the puzzle suddenly began making sense. She began to understand Albert's weird behavior towards her; his leave, his unannounced comeback from Lakewood, then his nearly constant absence, his cold approach towards her in those moments they encountered, the mysterious phone calls and the project he kept hiding from her… And then, there was this breakfast two days ago, before she went to work… He seemed happy, excited, constantly made jokes… Such a different contrast from the days before... She went to work, full of hope that it was the answer for her prayers, determined to finally talk to him the following evening. However, she came back so late that everyone was already in bed. She also didn't see him yesterday and however disappointed, assumed that he was just busy with the business as always. And only today… She could now clearly see how naïve she was. The change of his mood two days ago wasn't her chance; this was only his way of saying goodbye…
Another thought occurred – and another piece of the puzzle found its place. He had taken the afternoon train and after the nineteen hour train ride to New York he must have reached his destination yesterday. The only hope was in the possibility that he spent a night in one of the New York hotels… but knowing his preferences about the travel and his habit of timing everything, she doubted he did. But just this once… she prayed. Please, just this once…
Her legs refused to carry her and she had to sit. As she turned to pull the telephone closer she noticed George's calm gaze upon her movements and she suddenly realized why he didn't resist when she asked him for help. The tears blurred her sight again and she swallowed, trying to fight them off. She should have guessed straight away… She knew George enough to know that he would have never obeyed anybody else but Albert. He would have never given up such vital information such as name of the ship if it was against Albert's will and if he did, it was because this information wasn't vital at all, at least not any more. If he betrayed Albert's command, he wouldn't be calmly standing by the window, with his gaze, ever so wise and patient and now, filled with sympathy…
It was heartbreaking but she was facing the fact that the chances of reaching Albert in New York's docks before he boards were very, very slim, if not nonexistent.
And just as she feared, her desperate efforts were indeed fruitless; once connected with New York Harbor's port officer, she was informed that 'Lady Louisa' had departed the previous evening.
Needless to say, she didn't have to be a genius to understand that Albert must have instructed George to give her his farewell letter after he was already offshore. The last piece of the puzzle finished the picture. If Albert planned this, and she had a very bitter feeling that he did, he had planned well. She had no doubts that he didn't want her to reach him on time.
Disappointed beyond words, she came back to her room, drowning in tears again. "How could you Albert, how could you?" she kept saying over and over, all to the silence of the empty room. "You had to leave, fine, but how could you leave me this way?"
Days passed. Then days turned into weeks. It's been a month now since she had made that phone call to New York and everyday ever since she felt ambivalent. Her heart was filled with anger and sorrow with a dash of despair and loneliness thrown in for good measure. But above all else, she felt... emptiness. Nothing was the same anymore. She loved this house, but it was Albert who was her real home. Without him here, it was just a cold, empty building. Before he came back from Lakewood, she at least had something to wait for. Now… there was nothing. Nothing she could look forward.
She reconsidered Patty's advice and she decided in the end of the summer that she would leave. George was strongly against her plans but finally, although reluctantly, had helped her to find the apartment. It was really small, it would have fitted into her old bedroom in the mansion, but it was enough for her needs. She loved the view from her bedroom - outside there was Douglas Park, full of trees. And the best part of it all, it was only minutes away from the hospital. It was her first true investment.
The three of them, Annie, Patty and herself had a great time fixing the place up. She did not have time for it everyday, but when the words "It's done!" were finally uttered, she found some sort of serenity. She had her own place. She visited the old mansion sometimes, but that soon ended. It was Great Aunt Elroy's come back that stopped her from going even near. The old lady could not take the family mansion being left just for the servants and she moved back from Boston. That's how the contact with the mansion stopped and except for George, who regularly visited her in her apartment, only Hannah came occasionally, always bringing some of her delicious cakes and special herbs for everything.
This year, she got enough days off at the hospital to spend Christmas at Pony's Home. That place was always so full of life! She always was welcomed there as a family member and that sooth a little her lonely soul. She could not get enough of hugging both of her foster mothers, children and her beloved Clynn, who, despite being older, did not lose his thirst for adventure. She immediately left her 'Milady Andrew' self behind and the first thing she did was to climb her Father Tree. The view of the hills covered with sparkling snow and dazzled by the winter sun was worth more than any wealth in this world. She thought nothing had changed here, even the screams of be careful from both the women, who in seeing her so high up would run in abject terror toward the tree in case anything happened… Also the atmosphere in there hadn't changed at all. The Christmas dinner gathered all the occupants of Pony's Home in main dining room and after enjoying delicious food they all went out to sing Christmas Carols at neighborhood houses. She was going to remember this Christmas for a long time; it gave her so much so needed joy!
Yet, despite the undeniable joy of being there she didn't find the expected peace. For the first time in her life, Pony's Hill had failed miserably to give her any consolation. Albert's shadow hunted her down even here, no, especially here. It was right here that she had met him for the first time… and when she came back to Chicago, her longing screamed louder and louder. To the contrary, she was becoming more and more quiet.
Albert wrote to her only once, she received this letter at the end of February. He described some of his research and despite the calm tone of this letter she could feel how passionate he was about his doings. He seems be doing very well without me, she thought with bitterness. There was no word about himself, like he didn't want to share with her more than facts. There was no word regarding her, except for few lines in which he wished her all the best for the New Year. There was no return address either and George swore to her that reaching Albert was impossible, due to him being far away from main cities. The only contact they have had was by rare telegrams in which Albert informed that he was alive and well. It was impossible then to even add a postscript from her.
And she should have known better. If she wasn't so blinded by the pain of the disappointment, she would have realized that Albert, with his sense of responsibility, would have never left without organizing everything, including the ways of communication. She should have known that neither Montgomery nor George would allow such a situation to arise in which they had no possibility of reaching Albert in case of any family emergencies. And there was indeed a deal the men had made a few months before. Albert wished to be left alone and only giving George the places he could be reached at, he also asked him to post about everything but Candy, unless it was a life-and-death situation. And now, even though Candy didn't know that, in denying her plea it was breaking George's heart. He was never as close to breaking the promise had given to Albert as when she was looking earnestly in his eyes and only his inner discipline stopped him from doing so. The sympathy he felt was hidden deep, much deeper than when he was witnessing her despair after Albert's departure.
.
Things began to get even more complicated for her. If Patty was the one who opened her eyes and confirmed what she suspected already, Annie was the one who truly scolded her, without holding back. "How could you be so blinded, Candy?" she yelled at her, "I will never stop wondering why it had to take so long for you to notice how wonderful a man he is! He loved you, yes, he did and you are right thinking that his feelings were far from being brotherly. But you still don't get it. You keep repeating how upset y o u are, because he left you – did you think even for a moment how h e must have felt? Did it occur to you just for a second w h y he left? Think about it now then! Living for years under one roof with someone he loved the most, convinced that she would die for one his best friends! Would you be capable of doing so?"
She had to admit that her friend was right. Albert was always in her life, always there for her, she just took it for granted. She had already once focused so much on her shattered feelings that she did not see his and she did it again, when he left… The only thing she was capable of was to feel sorry for herself…only for herself. Where was he in this? What right did she have to blame him for leaving? After what she had threatened him, after what she did at the party… He couldn't have possibly known what really happened between her and Terry and how it changed her… He couldn't have possibly known that she was going to talk to him openly. She was too much of a coward to even indicate her intention…
From that moment on the shame never left her. She couldn't even stand herself in the mirror.
The only consolation was her work. She seemed to be bristling with the energy and constantly sought out thousands of new things she could be helpful with. Everything seemed to be a good opportunity to volunteered countless numbers of long hours for being with patients in her free time. This was her cure. This was something real, something sure, something she could hold on to and carry on doing, trying to keep herself focused and her mind away from the pain in her heart.
However, sometimes, on some of the easier night shifts, when she had completed absolutely every single task, her thoughts began to wonder off. Like a moth to a flame, she kept coming back to her phantoms and once she gained enough courage, she looked deep into her soul. What she saw there was heartbreaking. Annie's words made her realize that even though she had missed his presence before, it was still far from being a selfless act of love. Now it was changing. There was something different about her longing for him; something new had been growing for some time now, delicate at first, gradually stronger and stronger. Was this ever meant to be as strong a storm that she once felt for Terry, she wondered again and again. Or was it going to stay in a shadow of the past and be only some sort of love? But her wondering wasn't anymore about what she needed; it was about what Albert deserved to have. For once, she completely forgot about herself and began thinking only about him. And there was one thing she was certain about; Albert should have somebody to love him without condition, no exceptions, for his nobleness, his great heart, his wonderful eyes, for everything, she had always known that… Why her? Why did he torture himself with this… for her…? What has she done so special to receive such feeling? Nothing. What could she possibly do compensate him for his suffering? She didn't know. And how could she test her feelings without hurting him? She knew she would have to do something. But would he even let her try? Would he want her? Did he still love her? It has been a long time…
Some day, when he comes back… If he will ever come back… she kept repeating. Some day I will find out…
She barely noticed that winter had faded away and then replaced by spring which turned into summer. Nor did she care… All what mattered to her was her work.
©GosieKin 2009
