Walking Dead enters Zombieland

Follow the Rules

By Jesus Dejesus

Chapter 1

Towns are a wasteland, tragedy is everywhere, all hope is lost. There is a black figure approaching dead or alive they fear both.

Columbus Ohio enters a gas station, hopefully finding gasoline, uses the bathroom but finds a unwanted guest: a walker, he screams as he runs to his car unlocking the door leaving.

Columbus: The first lesson on surviving zombieland: Cardio, when the virus struck for obvious reasons the first ones to go were the fatties, poor bastard, as the virus spread and the chaos grew, there's a reason why you should have a gun on you which leads me to my next rule: The double tap, if your not quite sure that the undead are really dead, don't get stingy with your bullets, maybe one more clean shot to the head

[Lady gets eaten alive by walkers, screams in pain]

Columbus: It was not long until the zombies got clever somehow they can just smell your fear, don't let them catch you with your pants down which leads me to my next rule: Beware of bathrooms. It was not long until the virus hits children, and you soon realize that your bundle of joys are now sick little monsters it was time to stop driving car pool, which ultimately leads me to my next rule, pretty basic: Seatbelts, fastened your seatbelts it's going to be a bumpy ride. After what happened at that gas station is should take the rules seriously, on the bright side i found a place to go number two.

[Bell Gongs]

Columbus: Another rule of surviving zombieland: Travel light and i don't mean just luggage, i always been kind of a loner, i avoided other people like they were zombies even when they are zombies, now that they are all zombies i kind of miss people, so i heading from my college dorm in houston texas to columbus ohio, where i expected to see a familiar face or any face that does not has blood on their lips or flesh between its teeth.

[Hears a car approaching, Hides behind a motorbike, Stranger with cowboy hat steps out and pulls his gun, so does columbus, columbus holds his thumb out and the stranger offers him the ride]

Columbus: Thank you [Checks the back seat]

Stranger: What are you looking for?

Columbus: Nothing i just have this list.

Stranger: No one back there but my duffel bag.

Columbus: So what's your name?

Stranger: Stop, no names [Drinks whiskey] Hmm?

Columbus: No thanks i only drink once.

Stranger: Where you heading?

Columbus: Columbus Ohio you?

Stranger: Tallahassee.

Columbus: You know Tallahassee and Columbus are both east.

Tallahassee: So?

Columbus: So Tallahassee you want to stick together at least for a while?

Tallahassee: Here's the deal Columbus i'm not a fan of teamwork and i sensing your bit of a bitch so i'll take this relationship as far as arkansas.

Columbus: Sure! Sure you can take me as far as Arkansas, might wanna buckle up you know for safety.

Tallahassee: I can tell already you are gonna get on my nerves.

Columbus: [Thinking] Even though teamwork was not my style i figure i be safe with tallahassee, see he was in the butt kicking business.

*Flashback*

Tallahassee: Business is good.

*Flashback over*

Columbus: This is going to be a rocky start.