Hi everyone, I have had this idea for a while now and really wanted to try and see if i could write it, i am sorry for putting my other fics on hold but this got me a little excited. I have no idea if it will be any good or not as it took me a week to figure out how to get this on paper, plus work, so it has been a bit of a struggle. Hope you like it.

I do not own glee!


Hi, my name is Rachel Barbara Berry; I live in Lima, Ohio with my two gay dads. Correction, I used to live in Lima, Ohio with my two gay dads', now I just live in Lima, Ohio.

They didn't die or anything like that, they just never came back. When I was younger they used to disappear on business trips for months at a time and, consequently, I had to grow up faster than expected. I learned how to cook, clean, shop and all the other things involved with running a household. I was 9 years old...

I thought that they were just going on another business trip, but after 9 months of waiting, I started to become a little anxious, but there was nothing I could do. I had finally accepted that they had left me after a year of waiting and here I am now, 2 years later, working 3 different jobs to pay the bills as well as attending high school.

I can't tell anybody I am living by myself in case they phone the authorities and have social services take me away; I am only 15 years old after all. Getting trapped in the fostering system is not something I plan on.

"Man hands!" is yelled down the corridor and just as I turn around to face this person, I find myself slammed back into the lockers with the front of my sweater gripped tightly.

"Hello to you too Santana, would you mind terribly releasing your grip on the front of my sweater, I find this very unbecoming of a young lady and I would appreciate some breathing space" I say as calmly as possible looking at her in the eye's.

"Shut up dwarf, I have a message from Quinn" she says with an evil smile and it takes everything in me not to shudder out of fear. She brings her face close to my ear, pressing me firmly against the lockers, "Stay away from Finn or it will be the last thing you ever do in this school" she finishes, tightening her grip for added affect.

Finn? Seriously? The only reason I had been chasing him around was to convince him to join New directions, once I had heard him singing to himself, there was no doubt in my mind that he would make the perfect leading man, not someone I wanted to date. He is lacking the intelligence and compatibility to be boyfriend material, besides, there is one minor detail that has a huge contributing factor as too why we could never date...

"I believe your assumption of my pursuit of Finn is completely misguided, I have no interest in dating him, I only wished for him to join new directions and put his musical talents to good use. However, if Quinn does not feel as though she can trust Finn to remain loyal to their relationship, then maybe she should join Glee club as well" I finish with a shrug. The club needs more members if we are going to compete in sectionals, so why not try and convince the cheerleaders to join?

"Can you stop with your bullshit rambles?! Just back the fuck off of Finn and we won't have a problem. Got it?" She says menacingly to which I gulp nervously.

"While I find your use of language distasteful and completely unnecessary, I can assure you that I will not be pursuing Finn Hudson in the near nor distant future." I tend to ramble when I'm nervous, and having my life threatened, is a very good reason to be nervous.

"Finally!" she shouts, slamming me into the lockers one last time before storming down the hallway as people hurriedly shuffle out of the way for her.

I slide down the front of the lockers slowly until I make contact with the floor, wincing in pain. She may have shoved me a little harder than expected as my back feels like it is on fire. I sit there, wondering how everyone in this school ignores such acts of violence and bullying, sometimes even going as far as to laugh along with the bullies.

SPLASH! Laughter fills the hall as I sit there; dripping with grape slushy that has now completely foiled my clothes. I understand that my attire is not exactly fashionable, but it is the only thing I can afford, especially when Neanderthals such as David Karofsky, keep ruining them.

I stand up, wincing slightly at the pain in my back before smiling, I turn around and reopen my locker to grab my slushy kit and head off to the bathroom.

This is going to be a long day.


I felt like crying in relief when the bell went signalling the end of the day and I never thought I would be happier knowing that there was no glee today. Don't get me wrong, I love the club dearly, but I really needed to get home and relax.

As soon as I step through the threshold, I ran and threw myself on the couch in a very unladylike manner, but I could care less right now.

What is everyone's obsession with me? It seemed that the moment I entered McKinley high I was a target and I had done absolutely nothing wrong, I hadn't even spoken yet when I got my first slushy facial. I am constantly called derogatory names like man hands... My hands aren't manly are they? Do I even look like a man? I am 95 percent confident that there accusations are false so why worry?

My mind started to drift and it wasn't long before I had given in to the urge to sleep, not even removing my shoes.

BANG! BANG! BANG! "Hello? Is anyone in there?" I was woken abruptly by the constant banging on the front door and the raised voices. In my half asleep half awake state, I didn't even pause to consider who may be at the door and just slammed it open in annoyance.

"What?!" I asked rudely, but what can you expect when someone has just woken up like that? Of course I would be annoyed.

"Are you Rachel Barbara Berry?" the female asks authoritatively. I feel my sleepy haze start to lift as I process what is going on.

"Yes?" I reply uncertainly. Why do I have a bad feeling about this?

"Where are your parents Rachel" she asks surprisingly softly.

"Away on a business trip, who wants to know?" I demand, this can't be good.

"I am Kara Jenson with social services and I am afraid you are going to have to come with me Rachel" she replies calmly taking a step forward.

No, this cannot be happening, I have not spent the past 2 years working and trying to keep this a secret for some woman I don't even know to come in and ruin it all.

"No, you have it all wrong, my parents are coming back, you can't take me with you as that would be kidnapping. I would like to politely ask you to leave this property now" I try to sound firm in my words, but find myself disappointed when I waver slightly.

"I am really sorry Rachel, but we had been informed of your lack of parents by your neighbour and managed to contact your fathers to find out what is going on here" she says calmly still walking forward.

I take another step back, looking at her with wide eyes. "What did they say?" I ask weakly.

She smiles sadly "they said to take you away sweetie".

That was the moment in which I snapped, I spun around on my heel and tried to bolt out of the back door. I had only managed to take 3 strides before Kara managed to lock her arms around my waist, holding me firmly against her so I couldn't escape. "No! You can't take me! I have been fine on my own for years now, you can't do this!" I finally break down and start sobbing loudly as she holds me in her arms, letting me calm myself.


It has been a week since social services have taken me from my home and I still find myself in an orphanage with children from the ages of 2 to the ages of 13, I am the oldest here. Normally I would have been put in a foster home until they sorted something more permanent out, but it seems as if they are all too full at the moment or simply don't want to take me.

The children here seem to ignore my existence, only casting looks of curiosity but nothing more. I haven't exactly made any attempt at conversing with them either, only speaking when spoken to and following orders.

I don't plan on staying here, I will find some way out I just don't know how yet. Running away would seem pointless as I have nothing, my father's left me with nothing, I would have to start from scratch. However, there is only so much a 15 year old girl can do in a world like this without falling into the wrong crowd. So right now, the orphanage is my best bet.

"Rachel Berry?" calls a voice from the door; I look around to find Kara scanning the room for me. I silently stand up and approach her, not saying a word. She sighs softly before turning on her heel and performing a follow me motion with her finger.

I silently follow her through the doors that leave behind the other children and walk into her office, in her office is a woman I have never seen before but seems strangely familiar. When she looks up at me from her chair, she stands abruptly and stares at me wide eyed with tears in her eyes.

"I think that both of you should take a seat" Kara says calmly as she moves around her table to take a seat behind her desk.

I move to my seat and face forward, I can feel the woman next to me burning holes in the side of my head with the intensity of her stare, but I refuse to look.

"Rachel, I understand that this must be difficult for you and I know it must be hard knowing that your parents have left you" she begins softly.

"No, not really." I say absentmindedly, wondering why this woman is in here and what they want with me now, haven't they done enough already?

"What do you mean?" asks Kara confusedly.

"My fathers have been disappearing on business trips since I was 9 years old for months at a time. So when I was 13 and they never returned again, it was hardly surprising so I just looked after myself and kept it quiet. I accepted the fact that my parents didn't love me a long time ago Miss Jenson" I say evenly, ignoring the shocked and sympathetic looks from Kara.

What I couldn't really ignore though was the loud sob from next to me. I looked towards this woman shocked to find her crying her heart out, clutching her head in her hands. "I should have been there, I shouldn't have let this happen! How could I do this to you...?" She is making absolutely no sense. What has happened to me is not her fault so she shouldn't be blaming herself.

I don't really know what else to do so I stand and slowly move over to her. I perch on her armrest and start rubbing circles on her back in an effort to calm her down, telling her it isn't her fault and she shouldn't be blaming herself.

I can see Kara out of the corner of my eye watching us with a soft smile, but I don't have the time to contemplate that, my whole focus is on trying to calm this woman down, I don't know why I feel the need to, but I just do.

She eventually stops crying and looks up shocked to find me there before wrapping her arms around my waist and clinging on to me tightly. "I am so sorry" she says with so much sincerity as she looks up into my eyes. I find myself shocked by the truth in her words, but I still don't know why she is apologising.

"What are you apologising for?" you can hear the confusion in my voice.

She slowly and reluctantly releases her grip on me "you may not want to be this close to me when I tell you" she mumbles quietly.

I move back to my chair and look at her expectantly. She takes a deep breath before facing me again, fear in her eyes. "I'm Shelby Corcoran and I am your birth mother Rachel".

To say I was shocked would be the understatement of the century. That can't be true can it? It can't be, but we look so much alike. "Why are you here?" I ask, not maliciously but out of sheer curiosity.

She looks at me shocked then "I find out my daughter has been abandoned by the 2 men I trusted her life with and has been taken away by social services and you ask me why I am here?" she says disbelievingly.

I look at her hopelessly "Well, I mean, you didn't want me before right? So why now?" I can see her cringe at those words, but I just didn't know what to say.

"I think I should explain some things to you Rachel. I was 16 when I was pregnant with you Rach, your father had run away and left me when he found out I was pregnant with you and my parents were distraught. I wanted to keep you, I wanted to keep you so badly but I knew I couldn't. I had no support system and my parents were angry enough as it was that I didn't get an abortion, but I refused to deny you life. I met the Berry's who seemed so eager to adopt you, they were so nice to me and had lots of money to be able to give you everything you might ever need or want. They could give you everything I couldn't, so I agreed. The day you were born was both the happiest and worst day of my life, it was the day I first laid eyes on you and I fell in love with you instantly, but then they took you away, no matter how much I begged and pleaded they said I could never see you again. Well at least not until you were 18 and you actively sought me out... I am so sorry Rachel, I had no idea it would be like this for you" she finishes, sobbing by the end.

I sit there in complete shock. I had a mother who wanted me, who did everything she possibly could for me, who blames herself for everything bad in my life.

I look towards Kara who gives me and encouraging smile and move to kneel in front of this woman, I put my hands on her knees to try and get her attention. She looks up from the shield of her hands and I smile softly at her. "This was not your fault. You only did what you thought was best for me and I am sure anyone in your position would have done the same. You could not have known this would happen so please, stop blaming yourself."

She through her arms around me then, holding me close "How can you forgive me so easily" she whispers into my hair.

"There is nothing to forgive" I say quietly.

"Ahem, I am sorry to interrupt your moment, but we do have things to discuss" Kara decides to interject; Rachel pulls back and goes to take her seat again, looking at Kara expectantly.

"I am sure this is probably obvious by now Rachel, Shelby is going to adopt you back into her family if you are agreeable of course" she finishes with a smile.

What? She wants me back? This can't be true? I must be dreaming! I have just been sat here for 30 seconds not saying anything, just staring at Shelby with wide eyes.

Shelby looks as if she is about to panic as Rachel still hasn't answered the question. Maybe she doesn't want to move in with her mother after all. Feeling completely helpless she says "Rachel, please answer the question" in desperation.

That seems to snap me out of it "You want me?" I ask unsure.

"Of course! I thought that much was obvious by now Rachel, I have always wanted you! But, if you don't want to, I completely understand" Shelby trails off miserably.

"No! No, no, no, I do want to live with you, it's just a lot to process , I mean, I went from being abandoned to being wanted within 5 minutes, it's a lot to take it" I finish sheepishly.

"Great, I will just go and get the paperwork" Kara disappears to go and find it.

"So, where do you live?" I ask with a smile, loving the fact that I now have a parent.

"I just moved to Lima" Shelby replies with a smile in Rachel's direction, not believing she finally gets her daughter.

My smile wavers a little... Lima... Just my luck!


It will be my first day back to school in 2 weeks. It is amazing how much can happen in 2 weeks. I went from being abandoned by my fathers, to social services, to finding out I have a mother who wants me and then to actually being adopted by said person.

We have so much in common it is unreal; we both share a passion for the arts, singing, acting and dancing. We both love Broadway and she said she will do anything to help me achieve my dreams which I am more than grateful for.

I am still a little nervous about calling her mother; would she want me to call her that? Would she be freaked out by it? I know I want to call her mum; she certainly is more deserving of the title than my dad's ever were.

Shelby had, much to my displeasure, spent a fortune on a new wardrobe of clothes for me, she was horrified when she saw what I had been wearing, but understood when I explained why.

So here I am in my black denim shorts and a black tank top with my bag slung over my shoulder walking in through the school entrance. The moment people see me the gossip mill begins, spreading word about my sudden change in appearance. I do my best to ignore them and continue walking towards my locker.

"Hey Rachel" a voice asks me from behind.

I turn around to face him surprised "Hello Finn, how can I help you today?" I ask politely.

" You look good Rach, these clothes suit you" he says letting his eyes roll over my form, making me shift uncomfortably.

"Thank you for the compliment but that doesn't answer my question" I say confidently.

"Yeah, er, do you want to meet up after school, practice for glee or something, maybe get dinner?" he asks nervously while I internally groan.

"Aren't you going out with Quinn? Shouldn't you be asking her out for dinner? Also, I have not attended school for 2 weeks so I have no idea what is happening in glee at the moment" I say tiredly, can't he take the hint?

"Well yeah but, we would just be going as friends, so I don't see the problem" he shrugs, looking at me with those eyes that can only mean trouble. Surely he knows that whenever her talks to me, I get ill-treated by both Quinn and Santana.

"Hey Finn! Get your ass over here dude, we got practice!" yells Noah from down the hallway.

Finn seems stuck about whether to continue talking to me or to leave; thankfully he turns to follow Noah. Noah looks back at me and gives me the thumbs up while I send him my best grateful smile.

The day seems to progress with relatively no incidents. The whispering is still there but I haven't received any slushies yet or any confrontations with jocks or cheerleaders. Well, that is until Lunch break.

I had gotten out of class late, I had to stay behind to collect all the assignments I had missed these last 2 weeks as well as collect any information I may need to complete the tasks.

The hallways were relatively empty as I walked down them as most students are in the cafeteria. So imagine my surprise when I feel the front of my body slam into the lockers as someone pushes me against it, holding me there. I barely have time to groan in pain before they pull my head back, whispering in my ear "I told you to stay away from Finn Man hands" before letting me drop to the floor.

I turn around expecting to see Santana standing there, but find myself surprised when Quinn is there also, she usually leaves Santana to do all her dirty work. "I do believe that Finn approached me this morning and I did turn down his offer for dinner, so I am not in the wrong here ladies." I say as calmly as I can.

Quinn smiles evilly as she picks me back up, and slam me against the lockers again. "Santana, do it" she demands and I can feel a chill go down my spine.

Santana then gets this evil glint in her eye as she turns me around, slamming my front against the lockers again; I can hear her pulling something out before I turn completely pale as my blood runs cold to the sound of my hair being cut.

I scream loudly, thrashing against her hold on me, trying with everything I have to get her to stop cutting my hair, but it is too late, the damage is done.

"SANTANA YOU STOP THAT RIGHT NOW!" roars a voice from down the corridor, filled with so much anger and hate that even I feel scared and it's not directed at me.

She lets go of me then and I turn around to see Santana completely pale, gaping at whoever it is who spoke, Quinn looks very much the same.

I turn to see who could have caused such a reaction from the biggest bitches in school and find myself surprised to see Brittany there, shaking with rage.

"How DARE you do this to RACHEL! She has never done ANYTHING to you two. She doesn't even like Finn so STOP PICKING ON HER!" she says breathing heavily, never before have I seen Brittany so angry. "You have gone too far this time and I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU" she screams at the end.

Santana looks hurt, she has been the one to protect Brittany from the bullies in this school, and they had a very close friendship. I know for a fact that whenever Santana had done anything particularly mean to me, Brittany never found out about it, so this must be a huge shock. Santana then hardens and glares at Brittany "You think you can survive high school without me? Well Fuck you" she storms off, dragging Quinn with her.

I sit there unmoving, before I start crying. Brittany rushes over and gathers me in her arms, rocking me back and forth saying everything will be okay, but it won't. Nothing will be okay until someone changes this school, because I don't think I can put up with it anymore.

I stand up ignoring Brittany's pleas and grab my bag, leaving this school and going home, I have to come up with a plan to fix this, especially since I am sure Brittany will be on her own now.


Dear mother was working from home today so she was a bit shocked when I came home early, but almost had a full on mental break down when she saw my hair. I broke down in her arms then, crying my heart out for everything they have ever done to me while telling Shelby at the same time. I had never seen her so angry in the short time I had known her, she always seemed like such a softy that it is hard to imagine her angry, but boy she was.

I go upstairs and take a shower, when I am out and dry I stare at myself in the mirror. My hair looks horrible, some place are cut so short that the hair is only a few inches away from my scalp, while others are slightly longer, about 9 inches, a mess indeed. Troll Treasure trail Man Hands The only man who would want you would be a gay one They shouldn't let boys in the changing rooms Is that your girlfriend? If they think I look like a man, then that is exactly what I will give them. Pulling out my own pair of scissors I hack the rest of the long hair away and start coming up with a plan.

The summer holidays are in a week's time and I managed to convince Shelby to let me have that time off. It is important that if I am going to go to school as a different character that they think Rachel Berry has moved away.

However, explaining to Shelby what I was planning on doing did not go down so well...

"You want to what?!" she demands.

"I know this is hard to understand but I have to do this. Going to school as a boy will not only help me create a new start for me, but it will improve my acting skills and help me prepare for Broadway, I can use this to try and bring down the schools hierarchical system and help put a stop to all the bullying. Please Mom, I need to do this" I say pleadingly, not realising my slip up.

"You called me Mom" she says in awe.

I blush embarrassed and look away "Sorry, I didn't mean to, I mean I did, but I didn't know if you would be comfortable with that or not..."

"No! I would love it if you called me Mom, I just didn't want to make you if you didn't want to"

"Oh, cool, so Mum what do you think?"

She sighs tiredly "I don't know Sweetie, not only would you have to be in character at school 100% of the time, which will be exhausting, but you also don't look like a boy, you have a very feminine figure darling" she tries to reason.

"I can wrap up my chest so no one will notice if that is the problem"

"Sweetie, even if you do that, what about your arms and legs. I know you exercise, but they are still to scrawny to be male..."

"That's fine, I have the entire summer holidays to beef up, I already have a membership pass to a gym and I will get to work on the training plan immediately"

"But what about if you get into a fight? Boys will not hesitate to punch you if they think you are a boy" she tries again.

"I have been taking self defence lessons since I was 9 years old, not having parents around, I felt like I needed to be able to protect myself. I will start taking the lessons again over the summer as well, that should help with the training programme I will be starting" I say determinedly.

'Sigh' "Nothing's going to stop you is it?"

"Nope" I say cheekily.

She grins back "Well, I have always wanted to try a project like this before when I was the head of the drama department in my early days, so I am kind of excited to see how this works. We will need to do more to hide your identity though. Cutting your hair short and wearing boy clothes will only get you so far."

I grin, thankful that my mum is going to help me. "OK"

"Also, you will need to start studying the male gender of your age group, how they walk, how they talk, how they stand, dress, flirt everything. Also, what kind of a guy are you going to be? Quiet and shy? Dorky? Confident?" wow, you can really hear her enthusiasm.

"Don't worry I know who to talk to about that, but not yet. I think it would be beneficial to have at least 1 person in school know anyway, and I know I can trust him." I say confidently.

"Good, that should help when trying to keep your secret, especially gym class, but I could have a word with the school to get you out of it... Now the final question, we can work out the finer details later... What are you going to call yourself?" she asks curiously.

I smirk "Rae Corcoran"


The past month and a half I have been vigorously training in both muscle toning and martial arts. I am happy to say that the training has definitely been paying off. My instructor has been more than shocked at my amount of energy and how I throw myself into everything I do, he can't believe what I have managed to achieve in such a short period of time. My muscles and legs are a lot more toned and show a strong definition of muscle as does my 6 pack.

I have also been sitting around at the mall, watching how a male interacts, how they talk, slouch, even were they look when talking, which is usually at someone's chest. It has helped to try and build my own character but I know something is missing, sure I could probably fool everyone, but it just doesn't feel right yet.

Mother had come up with a way to help hide my identity. She is really excited about what I am trying to do and has even bought me a new 'male' wardrobe. Full of ripped jeans, t-shirts, leather jackets and stuff like that. Hell she even bought me a special kind of chest wrap that makes it look like I have pecks without covering my toned stomach so I can wear tight t-shirts. Anyway, to cover my identity she took me to the hairdressers and got them to cut and style my hair to be sort of spiky with blond highlights. The finishing touch was the blue contacts as, apparently, I have memorable eyes.

So here I am now, walking to the one person who I will let in on my secret 1 week before school starts up again. I am in full attire, scuffed trainers, ripped jeans, a 'fuck you' t-shirt covered with a leather jacket, my blue contacts are in and my hair is spiked up. This will be the final test to see if anyone will recognise me.

Ding-Dong

"NOAH, ANSWER THE DOOR!" yells a voice

"MA! I AM BUSY!" that sounds like Noah.

"ANSWER IT RIGHT NOW OR SO HELP ME..."

"FINE I AM GOING!"

The front door bursts open, revealing an annoyed and confused Noah.

"Er, do I know you?" he asks unsure.

"Yup" I answer in my guy voice that took me ages to perfect with Mums help. It sounds a little husky, but definitely mal.

"Look man, I don't know what you are doing here, but your freaking me out" he says trying to sound intimidating.

I smirk then "The 'Puckinator' can be freaked out?" I ask raising an eyebrow.

"What? No! I am badass! Who are you and what are you doing here?" he says in annoyance before smirking "did I sleep with your girlfriend or something?"

I couldn't help it then, I laughed so hard I was nearly in tears while Noah looked as though he was getting more and more pissed. "I'm sorry" I gasp "but that was too funny!"

"What the hell man! Why do you sound like a chick all of a sudden?" now he was seriously freaking out. I decided just to push him a little further.

"Hello Noah, it is nice to see you again" I say politely, letting my Berry smile form on my face as I use my real voice.

"What the fuck! You ate Berry?!" I burst out laughing again because, seriously? Who would say that?

"No I am Berry" I finally answer as I take out my contacts looking up to his shocked face "and I need your help".

He let me in his house to explain everything, I had to pretend to be a guy though so his mum would let me stay, he has a no girls after 10 rule.

It took about 2 hours to explain everything, I could have probably got away without telling him anything about my dad's and mom, but I got the feeling that would come back to bite me in the ass (dear god, acting like a guy is making we think swear words!) so I told him. He was beyond pissed about that, but let me finish explaining everything, down to how I got were I am now and what my plan is.

"So let me get this straight, you want to start senior year as a guy called Rae Corcoran and fool everyone at school into thinking you are a dude, while trying to take down all the jocks and cheerleaders who rule the school?" he asks incredulously.

"That would be correct" I answer curtly.

"And you want my help?"

"Yes" I say confidently.

"What did your mom say about all this?"

"She was reluctant, but hell, now she is even helping me, the contacts were her idea" I say smiling thinking about my mother, she is so cool.

He looks shocked by that, oh well. "So you in?"

"Damn right I am Berry!" he says jumping to his feet holding up his fist for a fist pound.

"Good because while I need your help in keeping this secret, I also need help in how a guy interacts with girls" I say jumping up and punching his fist.

"Damn Berry! When did you get so strong" he says rubbing his fist.

"Since I have been training to beef up some to look more like a guy" I say simply.

"Wow, you really went all out!" he says in surprise, before smirking yet again "so you need help with the ladies" he says wiggling his eyebrows.

"Noah!"


Was it any good? Should i continue?

Thank you for reading and please review!