Mrs. Collingworth was beginning to doubt the wisdom of instituting a show-and-tell in her third-grade class at Gravity Falls Elementary School.
It had seemed like such an innocuous idea when she had first implemented it. Who didn't love show and tell? It was cute, it let children share a bit about themselves with the teacher and their classmates, and it gave them a little freedom from the usual monotony of assignments. But then, this was Gravity Falls. She should have known that it wouldn't be that simple.
After various incidents which had led to several of the motivational posters that lined her classroom walls being torn to shreds, multiple desks covered with thick claw marks, and soot covering a substantial portion of the classroom's white tile floors- along with six students having to be sent to the principal's office over the course of the presentations- the teacher decided that the first ever show-and-tell in her classroom would also be the last.
And there was still one kid who had yet to show the class what he had brought.
"And last but not least, Micah, it's your turn to show us all what you brought to school today!"
Mrs. Collingworth closed her eyes and prayed that this item would be relatively tame.
Her hopes were dashed when she heard muffled screams coming out of the backpack which the young boy was currently ruffling through.
The teacher steeled herself, trying to prepare herself for whatever monstrosity had been brought into her classroom this time, some gnome or fairy or…
…was that a lollipop?
Yes, what he had triumphantly grabbed out of his backpack and was now holding up to show his classmates was definitely a lollipop, one of those huge ones with rainbow swirls that was nearly as large as the boy's head. In the middle of the lollipop was a humanoid mouth wide open that was emitting bloodcurdling, albeit quiet, screams that sounded all too human.
"So." She took a deep breath and tried to make herself sound calm. She was supposed to be the authority figure here, though after today, she was starting to doubt that any of her students would believe that ever again. "Micah, tell us about what you brought for show-and-tell. Is that a lollipop?"
The lollipop's mouth closed, and the screams mercifully stopped. A small blessing.
"Yeah. This is my pet lollipop. His name is Dave."
"Hi, Dave!" a blonde girl in the front row said cheerfully. The lollipop gave a loud yelp in response.
"And the lollipop… Dave… he screams."
"Sure does! Uncle Dipper says that just makes him extra special. My parents wouldn't let me get a puppy for my birthday, but I think Dave is just as cool- and I don't have to feed him or pick up after him or nothing!"
Mrs. Collingworth tried to smile at the boy, to return his wide grin that revealed his missing front tooth, but her face refused to go through the motions of displaying a contentedness that seemed to have left her mind for good. She settled for a blank expression. "What an interesting pet you have there! Now, I think that about wraps up show-and-tell-"
"Oh, and Uncle Dipper said that if I was good, he might give me an even cooler pet for my next birthday! I can't wait!" Micah bounced up and down as he spoke, and the boy's grin only grew wider as he continued to speak over his teacher's instructions.
The lollipop started screaming again, its voice combining with that of the other two speakers to make their words incomprehensible.
Mrs. Collingworth stopped talking and cradled her head in her hands, trying to calm the raging headache that felt like it was ready to split open her skull.
"One time I tried to lick him- he tastes like cotton candy! But Dave didn't seem to like that much, so I…"
The teacher had never been so thankful to hear the school bell ring in her life.
