Started my daily ficlets to make the hiatus pass, then decided to keep going with a 2nd cycle, and then a 3rd, 4th, etc through 39th cycle. Now cycle 40!


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** UPDATED WITH CYCLE 40 CHEAT SHEET ** Check it out to find out about shift days, starting in cycle 40!


This is a shift day [see above]. There will be another upload this afternoon: Tender Love & Care: chapter 7 (final).


"For the Rest of Our Lives"
Brittany, Kurt
Extra to the Paper Heart series
POV Swap on "Step Five..."

It was dark out and she could barely see the street as he opened her bedroom window and looked down. She pulled back, closing her eyes and breathing deep.

"Not scared… Don't be scared…" she whispered to herself, holding dearly to Kurt's words and to the ledge.

Earlier that night she wouldn't have known what she'd finally decide to do. She'd taken a shower, hoping it would help her relax before bed… She needed it. Being back home now after spending these first few days at Santana's, she felt unprotected and exposed. Her parents still had no idea what was happening.

When Santana had dropped her off a couple weeks back she had to have seen her concern all over, not just her face. "It's going to be okay," she'd told her, and Brittany had looked over. "I get that this whole thing is confusing right now, but it won't stay that way. I think you're doing the right thing to wait to tell them," she nodded to the house.

"What if they get angry?" Brittany whimpered. "What if they kick me out, like Quinn…"

"Whatever happened, you won't be alone, and not just because of the baby." It got a small strangled laugh out of the blonde and ultimately, it should be your decision, no one else's, not even Kurt, but especially not them." Brittany looked at her. "Oh, here," she got a napkin – they'd gone to eat first – and carefully dried off tears from her face. "Can't go in like that or they'll definitely know something's up."

"How do I look?" Brittany asked when she was done.

"Never less than a stunner," she promised, sitting back. Brittany had taken all those words with her, and she had gone inside. She just had to remind herself that no matter what, Santana and Kurt were both only a phone call away.

With each passing day, with Kurt being his patient self about the decision, with having to lie to her parents, with knowing the fate of this little person inside her depended on what she decided, Santana's words bounced in her head.

Her decision… People were never exactly too interested in her opinion, like it didn't matter, or it was… stupid. To say this was the biggest thing ever to be left in her hands was as big of an understatement as they came. Every day she tried to make herself think about it, but… she couldn't.

After her shower though, she felt this new sort of calm come over her. She put on her PJs, sat on her bed to untangle her hair… When she was staying with her, Santana would untangle it for her… She always loved that…

The words were all through her mind: 'my decision, my decision…' It wasn't like she was picking what color nail polish here, it was life. She would try to talk to… it… Sometimes she'd lift up her shirt, beg to her stomach like 'it' could help…

She hated that word, 'it.' That was not a word for a person, it was… going to be one way or the other, so why did they have to settle for a placeholder? She sat there that night and she thought… In her heart she felt it was a boy, so that was good enough for her…

So say it was a boy, then what? The thought of getting rid of it was just not giving her anything but hyperventilation. "No no, no no," she promised reassuringly, pressing a hand to her stomach. She was realizing how much she'd already started bonding with… him… She had been looking out for him, they all had, they cared for him.

But what did it mean, that they cared? Now that she'd categorically ruled out one option, she still had two, she'd either keep him or give him away…

What would it be like though, to carry him in her all this time and then to just… let him go? She knew this would be okay, if she decided that way, but… every time she thought about this option, her heart would drive down, like it was trying to protect itself, the thought being too much and she was the one who needed to be held and reassured.

But if she couldn't bring herself to follow that route either, then she only had one left, and while it may have looked the most straightforward, there were hang-ups along the way.

If she kept him, then it meant lives would change, not just her own. There was Kurt's, his dad's, her parents'… She still felt terror at the thought of telling them, couldn't help it… If she was keeping the baby though she'd have to get over her fear, face the options, no matter what. She only had so much experience with kids, but what she had was good. Could she raise one though? Again this went to people and the weight they didn't put to her capabilities. Maybe she wasn't going to be a scientist or anything like that, but she had love in her heart enough that she knew this little guy would never lack of affection.

She knew that wasn't all of it, of course. She had to provide for him. What could she do though, at her age… She could teach dance… probably not until after though. Cashier wouldn't do, nothing that involved any sort of math. Maybe waitressing… take orders, bring people food, that wouldn't be too hard, so that could be something…

In the end the job thing was just part of it. Everything always came back to her home, her parents, and if it would still be her home after she'd told them… Even then, she knew her friends would protect her. She'd find her way, she'd never felt more sure of anything…

She gasped, paused… There, she'd said it, she'd find a way. She loved this baby and she wanted to be part of his life. More than that, she would do all she could to give him a good one.

"You're staying with me, okay?" she put her hand back to her non-existent bump. It was the calmest her stomach had felt in weeks. Then she'd looked up with a thought. "Kurt…" She had to tell him, he had a right to know, whatever he decided for his part… But it was late now, and this wasn't something you did over the phone. She had to see him, now…

She couldn't go out the front door, her parents would catch her, ask what she was doing… The window… That was her only way, but… She got it open, looked down… She'd climbed down before, but now there was the baby, too. She had to do it though, couldn't wait longer.

It had taken five times longer as usual to get down, but she'd made it. Now that she was down though, she had to get to his house. It was not that far, maybe twenty minutes on foot? So she went. She wasn't giving any attention to the fact she was in her PJs and slippers, unlike a handful of passersby, but she kept going.

Kurt had been so good to her all this time, and she appreciated it so much… Would it change if she kept the baby? He wouldn't… would he? Maybe it was all fine, so long as she ended up giving it away, or… No… Kurt wasn't like that…

When she finally made it to his house, she thought about how late it was about three seconds after she'd pressed the doorbell. The door finally opened to reveal first Burt and then Kurt behind him. After Burt had left them she'd just come right out with it. And Kurt, he'd looked… relieved. Now her heart wasn't hiding anymore, it was happy, relieved, too. This would be the right decision. She knew, because no matter how it would end, it had started with her.

THE END


A/N: This is a one-shot ficlet, which means that signing up for story alert will not bring you any alerts.
In the event of a sequel, the story will be separate from this one. And as chapter stories go, they are
always clearly indicated as such [ex: "Days 204-210" in the summary] Thank you!