AN: this is my first attempt at writing VK, to be honest Im nervous with this one since I haven't watched the entire anime or read the entire manga. The story why I watched the anime on the first place is because when I saw the cd at our local shop; it had the faces of Kaname and Zero and I thought; this must be yaoi, well my heart was broken when I saw Yuuki though I continued with it anyway. I only stopped when I started seeing fanfics of Kaze. And the rest is history. Im an ultimate KaZe fan so I've poured my heart out with this undertaking so I hope you'll like it. Constructive criticisms are always welcome, I love to hear feedbacks from fellow KaZe fans.
Title and story inspired by a song from a local band called Hale.
Beta: SexyBVirgo (my idol) – Thank you for the positive and encouraging feedbacks you are the best!
Broken Sonnet
CHAPTER 1
The bell signaling the end of the class has finally rung.
It was the only thing that I heard and noticed during the entire duration of my stay in the classroom; my mind was elsewhere and I have nothing else in it apart from needing to go somewhere quiet and cry my heart out. It was something that I hadn't done in years; ever since I was a little child.
"Zero!" Yuuki called as I was walking out of the school grounds. How lucky can I get? And here I was trying to find peace and quiet. The jaybird's incessant chatter is something I don't need right now.
"Where are you going? Kaname is not here yet." She said as she caught my hand and started swinging it around. At the mention of his name the pain in my chest started hammering again. I really need to get away.
I instantly took my hand away from hers like it had caught fire which earned a gasp from my nosy friend. "I'm going alone today Yuuki, if you see Kaname tell him I'll be back by six." I said and hurriedly ran away from the grounds and from a stunned Yuuki. Well, I can't blame her, ever since I started school I never went to class and back home without Kaname by my side. As the next in line to rule the hunter clan, I can never be without the powerful pureblood due to constant threats by renegade vampires and level E's. But with the way things are; I'd rather face dozens of enemies than the one who'd just broken my heart.
My loyal servant.… Kaname Kuran.
~~KZ~~
"Zero-Sama, while its true that I've loved and cherished you ever since I saw you as a child; that love is like a brother's loves for his younger sibling. Ill give you my everything including my life but what you're asking for Is something that I'm not capable of giving.…"
"Forgive me Zero-Sama"
Those were not the words that I was expecting as I confessed my love for him yesterday. I've loved him for as long as I can remember and I thought that those loving gestures he'd bestowed upon me as I was growing up was an indication that there was a chance he felt the same way, so I'd gathered my courage and prepared for the confession after much agonizing with the matter every night; but to no avail. And this; the cliff side that we both love was the same place where I'd poured my heart out. Upon remembering what had transpired, the pain in my chest came back. Shit. It's past six and it's dark from where I stood but I still can't go home in my condition. So I laid myself in the grass, tears still pouring freely from my eyes. I might have accepted it if Kaname told me that he could not return my love due to the differences with our status or because it's unacceptable since we were both male. But because he sees me as a little brother? It was like saying that there was no hope for me to expect that my feelings will be returned. I was never a pathetic person but as sleep started claiming my consciousness, I thought to myself that it's best if I never woke up…
The moment I regained some semblance of cognizance, I noticed that my head was resting on a certain familiar lap and I was breathing in the tangy, citrusy scent that I'd come to love while a hand was busy ruffling my hair.
Yes, this was my happy place… by Kaname's side
Wait, Kaname?
My alertness now regained, I stared at the person that cradled me and the first thing that I saw was the intense sienna colored eyes that stood out even with the lights of the city glinting down below of the Cliffside where I took refuge. I would've stared at those resplendent orbs forever if it hadn't reminded me of the ache that had occupied my chest again. So I stood up, but Kaname's hands held my waist and pulled me back down to sit on the grass. Those same hands then rested on my shoulders so that I faced him once more.
He was staring intently at my still tear stricken face with look of worry. At that moment a fresh wave of tears started to gush. "Zero-sama." He whispered, his voice was crackling with strain and his face was etched with worry. That was when I realized how pitiful I must have looked. And pity is the last thing that I needed from him, so I unlocked myself from his arms, stood back up and wiped my tears away.
"I don't need your fucking sympathy ok?" I blurted out harsher than I intended. Kaname might have rejected me, but my pride cannot accept his pity in place of love that I so wanted. I walked away and tried to locate the car Kaname brought with him when all of a sudden I was encased by arms of steel.
"Zero-sama, please don't hate me." He said in a pleading voice. "Please believe me when I said that you're the most important person in my life and I don't want to lose you." As he said this, his grip on my body tightened.
I rested my head on his shoulder, feeling defeat. I know how hard this is for Kaname as well and that's what makes the situation more frustrating. I cannot avoid him even after knowing the limitations of his feelings for me. We are like brothers after all, and I'm the younger brother who wants to cross certain lines that I know are forbidden. "Kaname, it hurts. Please understand." I pleaded back.
He released me from his grip and kissed my forehead before facing me. "I know, and I apologize for this." He was gazing fixedly at me and I know he was trying so hard to get his feelings across. "Zero-sama I might not be able to give you that kind of love, but I'll make up for it by being faithful to you. I'll give you all other kinds of affection that you will need. And I promise I won't let go. Ill be your servant, your parent, your brother anything! So please don't distance yourself away from me because of this, it is something that I cannot bear."
I felt the intensity and sincerity of his declaration and together with his pain brought about by the situation, all plans of breaking away from him faded away from my mind in an instant. I know it will be hard from this point forward, but I know it will be harder to live away from him. My existence was defined by him after all, no matter how I try to stop it. "I can't promise that this feeling will just go away Kaname, nor can I guarantee that the feeling of awkwardness will vanish on my part… But I won't go…since I cannot leave without you that's once thing I'm certain of."
For the first time after this whole episode, I saw Kaname's smile. It's the one reserved only for me, ever since I was a kid. It dampened the pain. At least at the moment.
"That's enough for me Zero-sama. We will get past this I swear."
~~KZ~~
"Where the hell have you been?" It was Kaito who first noticed us as we were walking past the living room of my stepfather's mansion. He was clearly irritated that I'd gone beyond the curfew that they'd set for me.
"Not now Kaito… I'm tired"
"The hell I care if you're tired! You made everyone sick with worry!" He grabbed my arms forcefully, trying to make his point. I was too tired to even resist. My stepbrother has always been the one who made sure that all my curfews were followed. If Kaname was not around, he might be the one appointed as my bodyguard. I shuddered with the thought.
Kaname then inserted himself between us and grabbed my arms back. "You heard him, he is tired. He will explain after he gets his rest." He said, his voice laced with anger.
"Shut up leech! I'm not talking to you! Stay out of this" Tension started to besiege the room and I could sense acrimony emanating from both Kaname and Kaito. I was about to stop when I saw the familiar faces of Cross and my teacher Yagari. Almost at their backs.
"Kaito-kun, Kaname stop this at once!" Cross tried hard to make his voice menacing but it still ended up as soothing and doing nothing whatsoever to ease the tension. As usual Yagari-sensei just kept quiet. So I decided to interrupt to end the scene.
"I'm sorry for my rude behavior. I was just trying to relax, so I went to my favorite place. The place was soothing and before I knew it I'd dozed off and if not for Kaname, I might still be there. Sleeping." I explained as I bowed my head to both Cross and Sensei and even to Kaito. "It won't happen again, I promise."
Cross laughed at my explanation. "Whats so funny?" Kaito, still annoyed, asked the now amused Cross.
"Well, it's funny that we were coming to different kinds of conclusions that Zero was attacked when all this time Zero-kun was spending his time in lala land." He smiled, still clearly delighted by my explanation.
Yagari-sensei breathed a sigh. "Just don't do this again know yourself how many Level-E's that were trying to get close to you Kaname had caught this past few days. If you need to go somewhere, bring Kaname with you. That's what he is here for. Now go to your room and rest. Kaito-kun come with me I have something to discuss with you"
Kaito clearly not satisfied how sensei wrapped up their fight, took one final angry glance at Kaname before storming out the room.
"Do you want something to eat before you sleep Zero-sama?" Kaname inquired while leading me to my room.
"If I want food I"ll grab something when I'm hungry. Please don't treat me like a kid anymore. I'm an adult now; I'm even in love with you remember?" I said, making myself clear to my over protective servant. Kaname was clearly hurt with my words which I didn't intend so I changed the subject. "Anyway please drop the sama Kaname. I mean its fine with me if you can just call me Zero or Zero-kun. I'm sure even Cross wouldn't mind.
The brunette pureblood smiled at my words. "I'll try, but it will not be easy." He said as he pulled up the blankets after I laid down. He kissed my forehead as he has done ever since I was little and was about to exit out when I remembered something.
"Kaname, what compelled you to save me when I was a kid?"
Kaname looked back and I saw how bowled over he was with my inquiry. He was silent for a while.
"Cross said that you betrayed your family and had given up your authority as a pureblood afterwards just to serve me. Why?"
"I never had a brother, and when I saw you, I knew that I needed to protect you." He said, his expression tender but sad. "Please sleep Zero-sa-kun. It's been a long day.
"Yeah. Goodnight Kaname." My eyes remained fixed on the door where Kaname had exited from and wondered how the intense feeling of brotherly love to someone he just met came to Kaname. A feeling, all-consuming that brought my pureblood love to even abandon his kin. All the thoughts of rejection, acceptance, heightened feelings and remembrance of the past was too much for my mind to process in one day so I let exhaustion consume me and gave in to my much needed rest.
TBC
