Her Dangerous Mind
*Pandora Hearts
Jun Mochizuki
Note: Miranda centered (because she gets no love at all so I can't help wanting to give her some. I tried to think like Miranda) from her pov. Before the Tragedy and before Lacie was cast into the Abyss.
Those long lashes fluttering over intense gray eyes did nothing to evince the instability hiding within the beautiful creature. Her ample curves and low bodice was enough to keep most men's eyes there only, giving them no reason to look farther into her. The men loved to look at her full lips but they never looked hard at her eyes. If they looked deeply enough into her eyes they might have seen the insanity clawing up from them, but they never did. They would run their fingers through her crimson hair and gush sweet words about her beauty, never once noticing the ax getting closer and closer before it was all over.
Miranda Barma was beautifully, undeniably out of her mind but she, like all truly insane, did not know it. To her, she and Jack were some of the only sane people in the world. They loved deeply and what was crazy about that? She knew they were kindred where she cut off the head of a young woman, one she wanted to be friends with forever, and he did not even bat an eye. They needed each other in this wild universe because no one else would help them. Sanity was relative in the mind of those that had none. She only knew that the color red those bodies spilled was more beautiful than her hair, the sound of metal and bone musical, their heads so wonderful to hold, and she knew that with their heads on a shelf there would never be any way they could leave her.
There had been so many people that left her and she just could not take any more people leaving! That was unacceptable! What she did was just a preventative measure so she would never feel lonely again. After their household fell, everyone left her, all but Arthur. Dear, precious Arthur, she loved him. Jack liked him too so she knew they were all as they should be.
A suction sound of wood leaving a connection to wood had her head snapping up. Her gray eyes widened, heart beating faster, a jubilant smile on her face as she saw the white haired Baskerville, Levi emerge from that previously closed door. So patiently she had been waiting in the big chair in the foyer for them to come out. Arthur had been working so hard to become friends with that man, the duke, and they had been talking business while she waited. If it was what Arthur wanted, she did not mind waiting as long as she knew they would come out again and she could see that attendant that was always by Levi's side.
The young woman was on her feet the minute she saw Arthur come out the door, eyes just glowing because she knew who would be following him. The assistant always left last to shut off lights and close the door. She did not realize she was holding her breath until Arthur said her name, making her take a breath as she let her eyes move to his plain features. Arthur was a lot of things, but handsome was not one of them, not like she and Jack, and not like Oswald. Oswald was perfect; there was no one as beautiful as Oswald!
She nodded to something Arthur said even though he was just a buzzing in her ear at the moment as she saw a shadowed figure coming from within the dark room. It was so hard not to just run up to him and throw her arms around that gorgeous neck, put her fingers tightly into that hair and just - But Arthur would be angry, she had to remind herself. Glen might not let her come along anymore if she threw herself at his servant. Glen would die soon and she was so glad, but she did not want his ugly head, she just wanted him gone. She only took the heads of people she wanted with her forever!
Oswald! Yes! There he was!
She had to take a step back just to keep from running to him when he shut the door silently behind him. The sight of him took the breath right out of her waiting lungs. Her eyes could not help traveling over him with hidden hunger. He was not like any other man! He was stunning with those narrow but quietly expressive violet eyes, his thin face, low brow, round cheeks, straight nose, and thin lips. His black, feathery, soft hair was the kind she could not wait to hold him by. Everything about him was perfect and intense. People took his silent unvarying expression to mean he was cold but Miranda knew better.
The quiet, brooding, tranquil ones were always mistaken for unfeeling but they were really the ones that had the deepest emotion. The rippleless water always had the most interesting monsters too smart to show themselves. They were perfect!
His lean body was perfect with legs, arms, and torso she just wanted to run her fingers over slowly to savor it. She could not help thinking how she wished she could get him to put those arms around her just once.
Miranda lowered her eyes to the carpeted floor, shyly lifting them to him to look beneath thick lashes. Playing the good lady was a necessity so she would tread carefully. Her true nature was not allowed in these circles, only with Jack. They both had to be so careful how they behaved, it was exasperating and lonely but looking into those violet eyes made it all fine.
Miranda smiled like a school girl at Oswald, just so happy to see him again. He looked at her, nodding a polite but abrupt acknowledgement before he moved to follow the other men.
Her dress tangled around her ankles as she hurried to catch them. Women's shoes were not practical for running but she would endure it happily if she could fall into step with the beautiful, quiet man she adored so much. His muscled legs were so much longer than hers that it took some effort to move in at his side. Very boldly, as the other two men spoke about things she could not care less about, she swiftly took hold of Oswald's arm. She could feel the way he tensed when she touched him, eyes glancing at her like a startled rabbit, but he still instinctively hooked his arm for her like a good gentleman should when walking a lady.
What a good man, the sort a woman had to keep no matter what!
Taking his arm brought his pace to a slower gate because he was a kind, observant man that could see when a woman was fighting to keep up. Her gray eyes took a moment to trace his strong hands. They were beautiful, manly hands that cried out for her to hold them but she would have to wait a bit longer for that. It was a pity he would never willingly hold her hand! She wanted them now but she did not have the means to take what she wanted yet.
"Do you remember me?" She asked sweetly, smiling very brightly now that she was with him, "I am Arthur's younger sister, Miranda."
"Yes, I remember." His reply was short, but exactly what she wanted.
She knew he would not forget but she wanted to make him speak to her. She loved his low, uniform, polished voice so much it gave her chills.
He noticed her shiver but didn't say a word. Maybe he did not know exactly what it meant. She could tell he understood more about her than most men all because he did not just look at people, he saw them. Even he could not know how deep her sinister mind could go or how vast her crimes. She had the kind of insanity that was of a dark and deadly but twistedly innocent nature. Reading such a person was impossible because in her world what she had done was not wrong at all. There was no guilt for him to find in her eyes because she felt none; there was no hate because she loved him; he might only be able to see a strange and awkward woman trying her best to stay close to him.
Oswald must have seen something amiss in her because he treated her gently. It was different than respect, more careful and guarded, but softer than he was with others. When he could do so he would avoid her, but when he had no choice he allowed her to lean on him as though his steady mind could strengthen the cracks in hers by his will. Animals knew when a mind was shattered too and they either tended that person or fled from them.
Little did he know what the lady gleefully clinging to his arm was thinking about as she gave him teasing, side-long glances. Even he might have been afraid of the dark and bloody thoughts swirling under her skull, thoughts of making him hers forever. She just had to have him and there was only one way to make sure a man never left her! They would lie to her and whisper sweet words about never leaving her, but they lied, they left! She could make them stay though, make them be hers for all time!
The others were not as stunning as Oswald, nowhere near so faultless. He made her wild to have him! There had never been anyone she wanted more or desired so strongly as this one. From the first moment she laid eyes on him she just knew! She needed him to belong to her! She wanted Oswald by her side forever and ever and ever! He was the one she had been searching for all her life! He was the head that would end all things if she possessed him. She wanted to kiss and hold him tight but she knew if she tried he would push her away. Once he was hers he would never be able to resist her.
She could not stop smiling even when her heart sank a smidgen. If only he would just love her the way she treasured him, maybe she would not kill him, but he would never love her like she so desperately needed him to! There was only one way to make him be in love with her! No one ever loved her very long, no one but Arthur. People always left her unless she made them love her forever. Just once it would be nice to know what being loved by choice would be like but she knew it would never be. No one loved her forever unless she forced them, no one.
It would be beautiful to be loved by Oswald. In her mind's eye she could picture it, picture them happy together. But no one stayed. To be safe she knew what she had to do. She could only wish for things like willing love but she would have his devotion one way or another.
Miranda sighed, flipping her hair back into place to frame her face. She had to look perfect for Oswald! She would just never let him leave her, that was all there was to it.
Maybe being driven out of their home and banished from all they had ever known was what broke that pretty mind of hers, but who could say, it was done now. Then again, considering all the devious and dark things she dabbled in, it was not unheard of. Others in her family had gone mad from things they became too close to or knew too much about, the darkness warping them in unheard of ways. It was a price some Barma paid for knowledge.
The fallen mad queen was as happy as a lark even if the world would never understand her. If she could have Oswald she would be happy forever! Jack understood this feeling, the need too great for words to be with the one you cherished. There was one person that understood her, Jack, and one person she loved with fervency beyond a wish, Oswald. As long as they could never leave her she knew she would be happy evermore!
Her hold on his arm tightened and she leaned in closer, "Has anyone ever told you that your eyes are lovelier than clear midnight? I love the dark of that hour. It is more beautiful than the sunshine, isn't it?"
He stiffened a little more but did not run like he might have wanted to. "No, no one has told me that." His mysterious eyes met hers for a moment of analysis, "The night does hold a peace not found during the daytime."
He was being so nice it could almost fool her into believing she had a chance at being loved, but not quite.
She could not wait until she took his head and all he would ever see was her until his eyes rotted away. She could not wait for the beautiful moment when he died with her in his eyes. That was her favorite time, the time they saw her for the last time and they became hers forever! His eyes would be the most beautiful sight.
Loving this man was beautiful. It made her so very joyful! She could not wait to be with him everlastingly!
Just like Jack, she was willing to do anything for this man's heart. As long as she could be with Oswald she just knew everything would turn out right. She just knew that their lives would be better if they could just be together. Wasn't that what all women wanted, to be loved by the man they loved forever? Was it so strange to want to love Oswald? She did not think so; she knew love was a force that drove everyone. Love was what everyone wanted so it could not be wrong to want it.
Love was everything! She and Jack both understood that. It was shameful more people could not understand love the way they did. If more people understood it she might not have to force people to stay with her, maybe.
Maybe after it was all over she would take Jack's head too so the three of them could be together forever. They should be together, shouldn't they? If not for the fact that Lacie was going to be cast into the abyss, she would take her head too so Jack could stay happily with the one he loved but the abyss would take that away. It was a pity because Oswald would be happier with his sister there too. There would still be the three of them though so it would be enough. Once it was done, she knew they would be as happy as she was, with her forever.
They could all be happy forever! That would be lovely!
AN: Everyone hates Miranda so that makes me love her a little. She's so yandere in the worst way and it just is cute in a creepy way. She was crazy as hell but cunning like the "Black Snake" Yura called her. I really think she is just so crazy she doesn't even know what she does is bad. She just loves Oswald and wants him to stay with her forever. The way she talks about the heads is like she doesn't know they are really dead, like death doesn't mean the same thing to her it does to most people. My inspiration started with seeing Amarevia's art on her, just sparked me like crazy! I HAD to write something on Miranda!
amarevia. deviantart art/Pandora-Hearts-tumblr-dump-SPOILERS-339889083 (without spaces obviously) But Miranda and all the blood in this inspired me! Vincent with a head because of Demois! amarevia. deviantart art/PH-Wrapped-in-darkness-210992022 and I'm just sure Demois is Miranda (could be wrong) and she contracted with Vincent on purpose and he has no frigging idea! I just know it's her! She can't keep away from those Baskervilles! Vincent hated her so she would just want him more! But yeah.
