Author's Note: I've never published any fanfiction before (in fact, I've never really successfully written any fanfiction before this) so go easy on me. I've only recently discovered Goren and Eames and how much I love their relationship/friendship/partnership after watching Law & Order: CI for maybe a year or so. This is supposed to take place right after Eames was on SVU in 2012. I read that quote she said and I was inspired...personally, while I'm glad these two never "hooked up" on the show, I think they are soul mates in the true definition of the word (whether that means romantically involved or not) and most of all, I cannot imagine them ever living without each other. Also, I should mention I've probably only seen like 20-30 episodes of the entire LOCI series but I've watched a lot of specific scenes with these two/read quotes, etc. so I hope it's okay. Let me know if there's anything blatantly factually wrong about anything I've written (I wouldn't be surprised, as there's quite a bit of the background I just made up, or took a wild guess at).
Disclaimer: Am I supposed to do one of these? Obviously these characters are not my original creations...if they were, they would never have parted ways, and there wouldn't be the need for me to have written this in the first place.
The Call
"All that time together…the two of us…it was like we were married…"
"But you weren't."
After Eames had that heart-to-heart with Benson, she goes home that night to a cold and empty house and feels a deep sense of sadness and loneliness. But instead of crying (she's feeling much too determined to indulge in that tonight), she picks up the phone and dials a number.
It's Goren. He's surprised, shocked even, to hear her voice, but he can't suppress his happiness.
She's angry. Not at him, but at the situation. She doesn't understand how they ended up this way. She realizes that it doesn't matter if they're not working together, she can't live a life that he's not a part of. For God sakes, she says, they were practically married! She doesn't want to end up a bitter old widow who's picking up guys at bars when she's 60.
He says a little tentatively, that he thought that she'd be better off without him.
She angrily remarks that she's spent her days getting drunk with other officers in bars while everyone goes around sharing their sad stories.
She says that if she's going to be getting drunk in bars with anybody, it had better be him, because then at least she won't have to sit in a room full of inebriated ladies sobbing over her pathetic life.
At least she could be laughing with him about their mutually pathetic lives.
And maybe that would make it a little less pathetic.
Goren's not really sure what to say. He's not even really sure he knows what she's saying.
After a brief pause, where he tries to understand how he's supposed to answer, Eames snarkily asks him if he's turned mute from his lack of yelling at suspects recently.
A bit flustered, he denies that, and says the only thing that wants to come out of his tongue...
"I'm sorry, did you just say we were married?"
She spits back (in a rather affectionate tone), "Trust you to only hear that part. But of the two of us, I think I'd know a little bit more about what that's like than you, huh?"
It's as if she's finally letting go of one of the few things that's kept a distance between them these last few years…her former husband.
He sputters out an awkward "I guess…" and she can't help but smile.
She asks him where he is anyway. He says he's been in Maine.
Of course he doesn't elaborate. So she teases him, asking if maybe he's found a bride after all, or if he's taken up lobster fishing.
Stammering an objection, she interrupts to say that he doesn't have to tell her now anyway; he can tell her when they meet for coffee.
"Coffee?"
"Yeah, you know, that brown, caffeinated drink that people consume together as a social ritual?"
"Right…"
"Unless you'd rather go out for a round of Jell-O shots."
"Ah, no, coffee's fine…"
"Good!" her lips form a small smile. "So when are you going to come back to the city then?"
"You know, I'm not busy tomorrow…"
"Tomorrow? Wow. Apparently you've missed me more than you've let on."
"Of…of course I've missed you!" He's indignant, because for a split moment he forgets that she's the master of sarcasm and he's worried that she's under the impression that he hasn't spent the last year and a half thinking about her constantly, but being too afraid to reach out and hear she's moved on.
"Well, that's good to know Bobby. I'll be damned if I'm going to be the only sentimental sap between us."
On the other end, he gives that small laugh, always accompanied by that signature smile that she knows so well. And now she can see his face clearly, despite the hundreds of miles between them.
After a couple moments of silence, she finishes with a tentative, "So…see you tomorrow" and he can practically hear her smiling.
Then without a further word, as if on cue, they close their phones.
But the conversation lingers on. She finds herself wondering if he'll have shaved, or if he's gone back to his scruffy "mountain man" look. She wonders if it'll feel the same way it used to, craning her neck at a 45-degree angle just to meet his eyes. She can't help but indulge in a grin at the prospect of having her old companion back. This time, she thinks, she won't let him run, or shut himself off, or doubt his own worthiness. This time she won't let him slip away.
In an apartment 300 miles north, he can't help but wonder if her hair is as long as it was when he saw her last. He wonders if her eyes are still as bright as the day he first met her. And suddenly, he can't wait for tomorrow. Despite the fact that he hasn't genuinely looked forward to anything in years, he can't help but feel excitement, and even a few butterflies (really Goren? Get a grip! he thinks) at the thought of reuniting with his "sister".
But only now, after all this time, he realizes that that word hardly describes what Eames means to him. In fact, as much as it terrifies him to even think of it, the way she'd described them…as practically married…was a much more adequate description. Not a crush, or an object to lust after, not even a potential girlfriend… but a wife. Damn Goren, you've been married ten years and you're only realizing it now? Sister, my ass.
He realizes maybe marriage isn't about romance, or lust, or kissing, or sex, or living together, but about the complete and utter intertwinement of two minds – of two souls. About emotional, and not physical intimacy. Physical intimacy you could find in a walk down a seedier alleyway in the city, or in a rundown bar at 2am. Emotional intimacy was something far more elusive…something, Goren thought, he had never found in another human being other than Eames. And when you find that person, you marry them.
So it was settled then. Tomorrow, he was having coffee with his wife.
Hopefully that made sense? I'm always afraid that things seem so clear in my mind and then come across as complete gibberish to those of you who don't have the pleasure/terror of inhabiting my particular brain. I know they didn't explicitly say when/where they were meeting (and I don't know if things like that bother anyone besides me, haha) but it just didn't fit well with the narrative. So insert your own imagination there. I'm thinking of doing one or more chapters, but I suppose it depends on how much creativity my muse wants to grant me.
Also, I'd like to share a few quotes taken from something someone wrote on tumblr about a different couple (Rory and Jess from Gilmore Girls) that, after altering the pronouns slightly, I feel perfectly explain Goren and Eames' relationship.
"Despite my theory that they are endgame, their connection goes far beyond romantic. They are each other's soul mate in every sense of the word. They get each other far better than anyone else ever could and understand each other in ways others never could."
"Whether they ended up together romantically, they will always have each other to lean on. They are the strongest support system that either of them has ever had."
"…they wouldn't be them without each other."
"I think that even if they didn't speak for five years, they could still call each other in times of need and still know exactly what the other person needs to hear. That's the definition of a soul mate."
Maybe after reading those, you'll see where I'm coming from more. And to whoever wrote those quotes, sorry for paraphrasing them and taking them out of context, but I promise I won't take any of the credit for your beautiful words!
