A/N: asylum!kaneki came to life after I made a series of sketches of him wearing his ghoul mask + strait jacket then I listened to The Perishers' Come Out of the Shade so this au came to life
This has been in my drive for how many months? I don't remember anymore and I p much gave up trying to squeeze everything I want about it in a single one shot so this is gonna more like a series of not-drabbles about Kaneki recovering from all that trauma and Hide not really his therapist but just there for him in every step of the way.
If you guys already know me from some of my fics, you wouldn't expect a happy ending because really, no matter how hard I try everything I just touch becomes tragedy
Hide was busy typing out a report on one of his patients when Akira threw a folder at his desk, causing the younger to look up.
He eyes the folder before looking back up to his superior before he asks, an eyebrow raised, "…and what is this?" His hands are already reaching for the folder, flipping it open. His eyes widen upon the sight of a very familiar face, a face he thought he would never see again six or seven years ago.
"Kaneki Ken, is our ward's new patient, recently rescued by Tokyo Police Department's Covert Operations Squad from an underground fighting ring. Poor child has been competing in it for almost 5 years now. Practically a veteran by the syndicate group's standards. It's a kill or be killed world. He survived by killing his co-workers in the ring, just to make people who are still unknown as of now happy. Rumors say the syndicate handling them were so tight on funds they neglected feeding them actual food they ended up feeding the beaten fighters to the rest to get through. Well, that and a bit of abuse, it seems. You'll see what I mean."
Too much talking, it kind of took half of his attention. Akira's talking blurred out somewhere. He forgot what she's on. Shit, she's gonna kill him if she finds out. But what's more important is-
"They found Kaneki?"
Akira appeared to be taken aback at Hide's words. She blinked once and twice, thinking about what she earlier said before looking into Hide's eyes, "I'm sorry?"
"Kaneki. Kaneki Ken. The best friend I mentioned before who went missing after that date he had." That I made him go.
Akira's eyebrows rise at that. "Oh. Kaneki. That Kaneki." Brows furrowing, she mutters under her breath, "This is not a good idea then," she turns to him, "I'm sorry, I'm taking it back. I can't give this boy to you."
"They found Kaneki, and no one told me about this? None of those people in the department ever thought about digging up a missing person's report five or six years ago?"
"Hide! Hey," Akira calls his attention, fingers snapping to his face. She leans down and tells him, eye to eye, "I know how important this is to you. You finally found your friend, in not very favourable conditions too and I feel really bad, honest. But you do know how you stand in this?"
Hide's ramblings stop, he opens his mouth to speak, but ends up with incoherent noises so he snaps them closed again. Scrunching his brows, he looks up, clearing his throat as he takes a deep breath, fixing his composure, he tells her, "Yes."
Hearing his reply, Akira nods, turning back to leave Hide's office, taking the folder back with her. She'll give it to someone she'll deem fit for the job. "Good. You can complain about that to the police later when your work here is done, but for now, go finish-"
"Akira!"
"…yes?"
"Can I…keep that?"
Akira turns to face him again, raising the folder, she asks, "This?"
"…yeah."
"Sure." She tells him, she sounds quite surprised and uncertain. Why would Hide sound like he's asking for the only existing artifact in the world when a patient's data sheet can be reprinted how many times one would want (if you're authorized, of course)?
"You know the visiting periods, but I can always fix an appointment so you can meet him during your day offs." She adds before leaving.
Before Hide can properly thank her the door was already shut with a soft click, and Hide reclines on his seat, sighing as he reopens the folder and looks at his friend's face.
When Hide decided to remember the year he last seen his friend, he finds out Kaneki has been actually missing for five years.
A few days after that, he found out Kaneki wasn't allowed to see visitors for a while because of what he did to Hide's co-worker-you know, the poor guy Mado assigned the cannibal to, another co-worker told him when he asked why.
It went on, and on and on.
It seems like Kaneki has been assigned to every doctor capable in their ward and he showed no progress of recovery. At all.
There are suggestions that he needs to be transferred to another hospital. With better and more competitive doctors. Also better security, someone also added. No one spoke up on who said that, too scared of what Akira would do when her eyes looked so sharp like that when she asked.
Turns out they're the last hospital willing to take him in. Most voted on keeping the boy (if he can still be called that when his documents say he's 23, a legal adult) kept under strict observations and if possible, not allowed to leave the four corners of his room.
They're just too scared to let him get any closer to anyone. Doctors, staff, and patients alike. He already threatened to eat someone.
Everyone (except for Hide) was already pretty wary of him already, after reading what they gathered on Kaneki's background, about the court deciding to keep him under custody until he's fully recovered. Kaneki cannot be blamed for anything he's doing right now, to be honest. No one blames him, contrary to what one may think based on how these doctors seemed to rather want him dead or rotting in a cage somewhere by the way they address him as "the cannibal one" because in the end of the day, they all saw how Kaneki was just a victim.
He didn't enter that underground arena in his own will. He was forced into it. The gladiators were kept in a cage. They talk and interact and make friends inside despite knowing that one of these days they'll end up facing each other in the arena as enemies. It would be to kill or be killed. Just imagine how many of these friends Kaneki made inside he had to kill just to ensure he would live.
They can easily see Kaneki's sudden outbursts and impulses were his means to defend himself. No matter how many times they tell him he's already safe and that he doesn't need to fight anymore doesn't mean Kaneki is truly safe. He told them once, when they got him in a good mood. He's always so wary, so jumpy around them. As if he expects them to suddenly drop the act of kindness they show him and hurt him over and over again.
Five months later, Hide was finally allowed to see his friend.
The room they were in was one of the rooms they use for group therapy sessions, but this one is empty and vacant. No session scheduled for the day was assigned here, so Akira told him this is the best place where he could talk and meet his long lost friend.
Hide knows Akira could've just set them up by the usual visiting area, but most patients steer clear off him after he threatened to eat one of the patients who rubbed him in the wrong way. An "oh, really?" later from said patient and the next thing they know, security and fellow nurses are already pulling an enraged Kaneki off his offender, mouth bleeding after he bit the person's ear off.
"I'll fucking eat you!"
Luckily, the victim's family didn't sue, but it's still painful for Hide to know that the reason why was that because they don't give a rat's ass about the patient anymore the moment they landed on the facility. They just labelled them off as "crazy" and blamed everything they did to their "so-called disease".
Other than that, no one exactly knows yet that Hide's long lost best friend Kaneki is this Kaneki other than Akira. They both thought it's for the best.
He only have three hours of free time for the day before he go back to his daily work, so he's still wearing his doctor's coat, and it would seem suspicious for anyone if they see him enter a supposedly vacant room without his coat on…he thinks.
The room was silent to the point that Hide thought Kaneki wasn't there yet, but a few slow, careful steps, he finds him sitting on a chair by the corner, hands folded underneath his chin, looking contemplatively at him in silence. It made him jump.
"Jeez, don't scare me like that!" he scolds him, a hand clutching his beating heart, the other carefully closes the door as soundless as possible.
Wait, why did he say that? Why is he acting casual? Damn it, no matter how many years has it been since they last talked it never felt weird to do it, but damn it, he's wearing a doctor's coat right now, and its impossible for Kaneki to recognize him anymore. Fuck fuck fuck-
"…Hide?"
-fuck fuck fu—what?
"Why…are you dressed like that?"
Hide knocked his head over and over on what's the best answer to tell him. Maybe something like time flies and wow, its been a long time, look at me, I'm a doctor now! I know its supposed to take a few more years but believe it or not I managed to finish my degree a few years earlier than normal because I had nothing better to do with my life without you and my parents were assholes who pressured me into doing shit I hate so as a fuck you I shifted to medicine! How about you? Nice bleach job, by the way!
No, that's not the right thing to say…
"Uh, er, well, you see—"
He was suddenly cut off when Kaneki started laughing. It wasn't one of those stereotypical laughs supposed maniacs make, but those familiar chuckles Kaneki does whenever something makes him laugh back when they were teenagers. A wave of nostalgia hits Hide for a second and suddenly the room shift and its becomes a coffee shop, they were college students again and Kaneki was just talking about his new book, but then the images fade back and they're old again, Kaneki sitting in the far end of the room, raising both legs and tucking his knees underneath his arms, looking at the floor, the sides of his mouth crinkling into a semblance of a smile, he mutters, "I must be seeing things again, huh?"
"…huh?"
At this, Kaneki looks up, looks at him in the eye and replies, "You're wearing a coat. Hide wasn't majoring in medicine. You're just someone I made up in my mind again."
"But, Kaneki, I'm real-"
"Just like the rest of them." Kaneki replies, a hand with palms open gesturing around the room. He points fingers at empty spaces and enumerate, "Rize, Jason…"
Oh yeah, he's schizophrenic…
But Hide's real? How is he supposed to tell his friend that Kaneki wasn't hallucinating this time? Ah damn it, he's a fucking psychologist, he's supposed to know what to say to patients like these-
-but that's it. That was why Akira refused to give Kaneki to him in the first place. He's family (sort of). Things like emotional attachment would come in and it would be harder for them to help him if he can't do his job right.
Hide remembers he came here to meet Kaneki not as a doctor who's about to tend to their patient, but as a person who's about to meet a long lost friend he once (many times) thought was already dead and body rotting somewhere dark and dingy, no one to know and remember him by other than him, of course.
If being Kaneki's hallucination was the only way Hide can meet him, then he supposes this is fine.
There's no need to approach this in a way a doctor would, he's not in a job right now.
He's with a friend.
E/N: First of all I'm not in any way or form trying to offend anyone before any of you goes "ableist!" on me. I don't know how any of this works and my sister who's actually the one who's studying the field told me this is ok so far so...yea
tho if someone else thinks she's wrong then feel free to hit me up and correct me. I'll be more than happy to make this as accurate as possible
also please let's talk about his au please please please I'm motoroilfreeway tumblr
