Watching my blood pour from my writs into the rainy night, I wondered what I did wrong to deserve this..
I'm blanking out now and the world is spinning round blood just covers my darken world and I try to cry.. Trying to reach out to someone.. Anyone?
My head hits the ground and I groan turning over and looking up at the street lights, my blood pools around me and I can feel myself slipping under now..
My name is Max Shadow..
This is my broken tail..
-
Waking up never seamed so painful by yourself when you know that everyone in the household your waking up to hates your guts for just being you.
Stretching I wake up in my cold room and rub my eyes.
"Just another day.." I say to myself putting on my glasses.
I put on a black shirt and black pair of pants and grab my bags heading down stairs..
Parents are fighting again.. Siblings are yelling... I quickly get in the bathroom and do what I normally do.
"I can't stand how you act! Another failing grade? Come on Max! Your worthless!" My mother yells throwing my report card at me.
"And this detention shit at school! I don't care if whats her face hates you its your fault for trying to be nice to her! Your so worthless!."
My dad yells throwing a book at me.
I stand by the sink and look at my self in the mirror trying not to cry, trying not to give up.. In this house hold you grow up quick, If your not strong you die.
I wash the blood now trickling from my head and run out the door down the road to my bus.
Trying not to cry I open my cell to see if anyone sent me anything trying to talk to me.. But its useless really of course no one would talk to me.
I sit in the back away from everyone and put in my head phones drowning out the chatter and finally crying.
I think life would get better the more you age but nothing seams to happen. Wiping my tear soaked face and watery mascara I exit the bus and walk up the stairs to the high school.
I'm not really greeted by anyone but it doesn't bother me.. What bothers me was what happened last week.
It must because I was raised differently or it must be what I look like cause the principal hates my guts and doesn't want to listen to me. A girl who I tried to be nice to keeps trying to pick fights and to anything to get me in trouble. I have been yelled at by the cops and threatened with Juvie when I didn't do anything wrong.
When I was younger I was picked on consistency but no one was ever there for me.. No principal, teacher, parents, No one.
That was my first lesson 'You can only rely on yourself'
I had friends die, dissaper, move country's away but I never cried. When someone would die I never cried.
But I'm getting of subject, As I writ down some song lyrics I feel like I'm going to cry again but I don't.
"Where were all the people when I was being ACTUALLY bullied? Beatin,bruised, verbal, where were they? What makes that person so special?"
I don't know I just give up.
She walks by the person who is the cause of all my trouble and glares at me strutting by in her thigh high stripper shoes flaunting her new item that she dam well knows I have been trying to get.
I ignore her. She doesn't know what its like to be broke with parents who don't care and don't help with anything.
I think she is gone but I hear her start to whisper something awful about me to some people but I brush it away...
It can't hurt me right?
The whole day I feel forgotten and left out, constenly tired, always in pain.
No one cares.
Its the end of the day and I try and cheer up for the only 2 people to treat me like I was out the door I run into the first one Rei, She is just leaning up against the door listening to music she turns to me slightly but walks out the door.
I think she might be pissed today.
Sh walks away and I run into Terra.
I know its weird I mean I'm a girl but I really love her its a silly thought cause I suck at love and I know that.. Nothing ever goes right.
She runs to me smiling and hugs me and my heart skips a beat and I smile.
But that's not the point..
After that and after detention I walk out the door as the cold spring night rushes by me and I look around wondering where my mom is.
I pick up my cell and dial her number and wait for her to pick up , when she does she starts yelling telling me that it was my fault that she forgot and tells me to get a ride or some place to stay and hangs up.
The cold wind blows and I try not to cry..
but inside my head tells me that no one cares..
Tell me that's a lie.
So I call up some people but no one can have me over..
'Am I just a burden?'
I decided to wing it and walk to my crushes place Terra's to see if she is home it may be on the other side of town but It doesn't bother me.
The night gets darker and the wind blows colder and I try to ignore the pain but the tears want to fall down.
I don't know what I did wrong to deserve this hate, but I must have done something.
I cross the road and look up to see a car coming for me and I dodge cutting myself pretty bad on some broken beer bottles and the blood begins to pour as I look up to see the person driving the vehicle is none other then the one who I have been having trouble with.
"Oh look some worthless trash on the road." She says kicking me and spitting on the ground.
Another person walks out of the vehicle,"Well ain't this a surprise the worthless nobody."
I try and ignore them but the words that come out next are worse.
"No one likes you, No one loves you, Its better if you juts die."
My heart skips a beat and I feel the tears now beating on the inside of my eyes wanting to be released so I can cry.
I get up and turn to run away but the other person kicks my ribs in.
"No on would care if you were to just disappear and die." The first one says.
"They would just rule it out as suicide." The second one sneers holding a butterfly knife.
I try and get up but they kick me again I cough up the sweet red liquid that sustains me.
It gets worse, they grab my writs and slice them with the knife laughing.
And they walk away leaving me to die.
I know it can't get worse but on the other hand I know it can.
My head dizzy i try and stop the bleeding walking like a zombie I try and reach Terra place at least I want to die and see her as my last image.
But every walk.. Every step.. Hurts worse and it starts to rain, My broken ribs and bleeding wrists don't seam to stop me as I walk towards her place.
A bloody trail following me.
And the angel of death on my side.
I turn the corner and realize how far away I really am I fall to the ground and give up crying, bleeding..
Why did this have to happen to me?
I look up the sky and my life blood flowing around me I smile and my vision goes blury.
It was a hell of a ride..
Life screws us all.
And the crimson flow of are blood will all be spilled one day.
I cry and pass out welcoming death like an old friend.
I float threw darkness and a warmth encloses me I don't care what happens any more..
I feel no more sadness.
Only loneliness.
And the angel of death at the gate smiling at me like an old friend.
Who was always on my side.
Always..
But a voice rings threw my ears.
"Don't give up"
A burning sensation starts in my palms and a brilliant light wakes me up.
I look around me groaning as I hold my side I see Terra crying next to me.
She doesn't want me to die.
The only one who cares.
In my dark world.
I turn to her and cry and notice the ambulance coming towards us.
And my blood still pools around me.
Around us.
I look up into her soft hazel eyes and smile coughing up blood.
"I'm sorry."
And I kiss her good bye.
-
Life so full of hate, Nothing to cling on to
No love, Just death
Blood the red as a rose
Shoots threw the heart.
Forbidden love
Its just the start
A love of an angel
the love of an devil
Blood mixed between the two
Will they ever part
-
She wakes up in the hospital bed weeks later as she sees the sleeping form of Terra clinging on to her hand.
She never wanted to let go
she stayed by Maxs side and gave some of her blood to Max to save her.
Terra yawns and lifts up her head and smiles at Max.
"Good morning." She kisses Max.
And Max starts to cry again, not from sadness but from the joy of knowing after 18 years what love is like.
Finally..
-
The scars on Max will forever remain as a symbol and a reminder of what she has gone and will remind her how to be strong.
-
