His raven hair was in a total mess as he fell to his knees. He felt like he was crying, but there were no tears on his face any more, just blood on his wrists, covering them, warming them. He seriously just wanted to puke his shattered heart out, but that wouldn't happen. He knew, because it never happened.

„Sasuke, you in there?"
Distant banging on his door. The person in front of his door was probably shouting, but it just didn't quite make it through to him.
„Open the fucking door or I'll kick it in!"

Like that idiot seriously expected any movement from the black haired mess that had locked himself in his room again. It wasn't like it was the first time this month his sorry ass needed saving.

Everything was in a bloody blur when the door finally gave in to some crazy ass blonde's kicking.
„You used to have manners, you shithead", Naruto spat out. While he probably tried his best to seem angry. The way he gently grabbed the other's bleeding arm to wrap it with whatever piece of clothing he found on the floor next to him, gave away that it was only his concern speaking.

„No need to raise your voice."

„Shut it. You better be good now or I'll smack your swollen face!"
Was it that swollen? The black haired boy didn't know. Had he cried after all? He still lacked any feeling in his body, so it was impossible to tell.

„You ruined the door, Naruto."

„I do hope so. They better not replace it this time. Enabling you to close a door behind you is not a good idea after all."

„You gonna tell on me?"

„I really should."
But Sasuke knew he wouldn't. He never did. Although it was pretty close sometimes, especially when he'd first found out about it. Naruto was such a loud and annoying character, it just made the black haired boy want to shut him up from time to time, so when words wouldn't do the job one day they'd gotten into a fight, which had only ended when Naruto had been kneeling on Sasuke and his sleeves had rolled up, revealing his destroyed arms. No one else had seen, but it was enough to shock the blonde enough, so Sasuke could throw him off and dash to his room.
Why the idiot had followed him he'd never quite understood. But why he'd let him in when he was banging on his door demanding to talk to him he knew quite well. He'd been crying for help for years, silently though, and it had been a relief when someone had finally answered his desperate cries. Sasuke remembered well how he told Naruto everything there ever was to tell. They'd talked for hours, he'd completely come clean before the blonde and it had felt like the weight of the world had been lifted off his shoulders. He'd only barely gotten Naruto to keep it to himself.

„There's no way I can let this continue", the blonde finally said.
„You need help, don't you see? Not only medical attention right now, but serious help. You're destroying yourself."

„Hell yeah, I am. What would I be tearing my skin apart for otherwise?"

The grin only faded from his face when a fist connected to his jaw.
„Told you to shut it before, didn't I?"

The punch had only been a weak one. Sasuke knew that there was no way Naruto would try to hurt him any further in this state, despite all the insults and his acted anger. He was broken enough already, there was no sense in hurting him any more.

„Telling on me is not gonna help me in any way. Quite the opposite actually."

„Don't get all smart on me. I'm trying to help your sorry ass."

„Must have missed that along all the insults and you kicking my fucking door in!"
He raised his voice at the end of his sentence, emphasising his anger about his damaged door.

„You could've just opened, bastard!"

„Moron."

This wasn't going anywhere, they both knew, so Naruto decided to help Sasuke to his feet in order to take him to his room, before lectures ended and the halls became crowded. He didn't want people to find out about Sasuke's weakness by looking into his room and finding him bleeding on the floor. The blonde knew well to support Sasuke and walk slowly, after all they'd ended on the floor before, because the raven had lost consciousness from moving too fast in his state.

The blonde's bed was so much softer than Sasuke's. He liked his hard mattress but he also enjoyed the contrast sometimes.

„I'll be right back", Naruto announced.
An uttered „Thank you" was all Sasuke could get out, before being pulled into a deep sleep.

One thing Sasuke knew for sure. Naruto was the hero he certainly did not deserve. But he needed him so badly.

When he woke up, he found Naruto sleeping beside him. So he'd come back after all. He'd probably cleaned up Sasuke's mess and informed the janitor about the broken door, so it would be fixed before lectures ended. Even though the raven haired teen didn't own much, he didn't need anything stolen from him.

"You awake?", Sasuke asked.
Now that he was, he couldn't stand the silence. As if a relapse wasn't bad enough, the silence afterwards fucked him up completely. He wondered though why he could never take it further. He thought about suicide so much, but never crossed that line. Sasuke's injuries were really severe sometimes, but they were never suicide attempts. Although he knew exactly what to do, he never did. He probably never did it, because he didn't really wish to die. The teen just didn't want to live, wasn't quite able to, there's a huge difference between that. Some people just aren't able to live in this world, not everyone's made to be alive and Sasuke always felt like he was one of them. Life to him seemed too much to take most of the time to an extent where he literally just hurt. The rest of the time he felt inexplicably numb. This state caused his worst wounds. The ones that needed stitches, the ones that could possibly make him bleed to death, because his nerves wouldn't tell him when it was enough. He hated the absence of pain, because he always felt it was the most intense feeling a living human being could experience, so what was the point of living if you didn't feel that? And how could you even tell you were alive at all?

His thoughts tortured him, the silence was unbearable, although it only took Naruto a few seconds to react. To Sasuke it felt like hours.

"Kinda."

"Thanks for…"
But the right words wouldn't come to him.

"…this."

"It's okay."

It really wasn't. It was nowhere near okay, but the raven haired boy needed to believe this lie for some time in order not to be consumed by his demons again.
He moved closer to Naruto, who always kept his distance while Sasuke slept. He never wanted to disrupt his sleep, since the bags under the black haired teen's eyes screamed how much he needed it. It had become a habit between the two of them; Naruto waited for Sasuke to wake up and approach him first before embracing him in a gentle hug. No one would probably guess how gentle the blonde could be judging by how clumsy he was most of the time.
In the beginning Sasuke had felt weird for sharing this intimacy with the dork, but he'd surrendered by now. He fought himself enough, his strength was limited, very much so.

They didn't talk for hours, just laid there, almost motionless. Sasuke didn't even remember when his life had become so seriously fucked up and he hated dragging Naruto into this, but he was far too weak to change anything about his situation, their situation.

Would this ever end?