It's midnight. I am browsing a manga reading app on my phone.

Mom says it's bad for my eyes to look at a bright lcd screen with the lights turned off.

I don't care. I am 29 years old. I know my stuff, shut up mom.

I find one of these new slice of life mangas with little to no plot in it, where the main focus are the moe characters.

Disgusting.

I leave a review of Zero, which description reads "go read Naruto instead fucking weebs". I then proceed to let out a giggle and leave the app to masturbate to some Sakura v Hinata hentai action.

Then out of nowhere, Naruto comes out from the ceiling naked, with a huge boner that splats right on my cheek, making a loud slap sound. My mother knocks on the door and asks if everything is okay but Naruto Rasengans her through the wooden door, leaving her unconscious on the living room.

Then, i notice his eyes. He has the Kyuubi chakra flowing through him, rage in his face and death in his eyes. I try to talk to him, but i don't know japanese and he only gets more angry.

He then fucking rapes my asshole and Shrek, who just came from under my bed. I then die. The end.