Camera Shy

Full Summary: Sasori never thought he'd have to do this. He never thought he'd fall so hard. He never thought he'd end up loving a ten year old boy who doesn't remember who he is. With a lifetime of awful memories and experiences, Deidara simply shows up on Sasori's doorstep one eventful night. Will Sasori be able admit his feelings in time and unearth Deidara's mysterious past? Or will Deidara have so many dark corners in his life that it's impossible to save him?

Pairings: SasoDei, DeiSaso, slight ItaHidan and KakuDei

Warnings: Yaoi lemon, OOC, mild language, violence, rape, ect. ect...

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, or any of the characters.

Other: Talking, thinking/dreams, writing


He was wandering aimlessly around the streets, oblivious of the confused stares he received. Lights blinked at him from every corner, the sounds of the city filling his ears.

He stumbled once, flailing his arms out to catch his balance. Unfortunately, his balance wasn't as good as he hoped and he fell forward onto the damp, scraggly sidewalk.

His knees and palms were scraped up as he got to his feet, but he didn't notice the blood running down his dirty skin. He put his hand on the brick wall for support, then started off again.

A woman stopped him, bending down to eye level and asking if he was lost. He didn't answer, he couldn't quite understand what she was saying. It was like one big roar. The woman asked again, and when there was still no reply, she reached for his hand.

He snatched it away and ran off, pushing past her in the other direction. He watched with puzzlement as he disappeared.

He walked for another hour, the crowd thinning out and the noise fading away. All was eerily silent and mysterious as he traveled into the deep, unknown parts of the city of Hokkaido. He could barely read the signs that dotted the streets, but he knew where he was. He also knew that's not where he lived.

He halted abruptly at the sound of a door clicking behind him. He turned and saw a short redhead peer out from his doorway, his expression bored. When he saw the other, he narrowed his eyes.

"Hey kid, what are you doing here?" He called, expecting the boy to either come towards him or run. But he did nothing. "Kid!" He yelled again, but the piercing blue gaze of the small blonde was clouded.

Sighing with frustration, he stepped down onto the street, going towards the child; he must have only been around ten or eleven years old and he looked filthy.

When Sasori drew closer, he noticed the boy had tied a rag around his left eye. The visible eye was a brilliant turquoise, but it looked milky, like he was blind.

"Hey!" Sasori waved his hand in front of the kid's face, but he didn't move an inch. "What are you doing here, I said!" He groaned as the boy suddenly swayed on his feet, and he begrudgingly held out his arms to catch him. Not a second later, he did, landing lightly in his outstretched hands, unconscious. He was so light, Sasori furrowed his eyebrows together.

Who is this kid? He thought as he kicked open the door to his apartment and carried the blonde in. More importantly, why the hell am I taking him in?! Even though he didn't want to trouble of dealing with a little brat, he couldn't just leave the poor thing in the street. He didn't like to admit it, but he wasn't completely heartless. He had immediately developed a soft spot for this child, and he didn't know why.

He stood warily in front of his clean, crisp bed, grimacing as he gently set the blonde down atop the blankets.

His clothes were torn and bloody, soaked through to his skin. His blonde hair was slicked over with dirt and there were parts where it had been ripped from his skull.

Sasori put his hand on his forehead; it was warm, but he was shivering.

Taking pity on the scrap, he slipped his shirt off his head and threw it into the garbage, cringing as the smell of blood and sweat fumed around him.

The boy's chest was perfect under all the bruises and scrapes. Some of them were still bleeding, and Sasori sprinted to the closet to gather some bandages and cleaning alcohol. When he returned, he swabbed the kid's cuts and scratches, keeping an eye on his face. His cringed at the sting, but did not awaken.

After carefully wrapping his chest and stomach, Sasori emotionlessly pulled down his pants.

He lived alone, paying off his apartment on a bus boy's salary. It was early in the summer, his first year of high school ending for the year. He was about to turn 15 in November. Living alone at just 14 was second nature to him; he never had parents.

If this child was sick, he needed to find the source, he needed to inspect him.

He moved his gaze around the boy's legs, they were just as bad as his chest and neck. Sasori slowly flipped him over and wrinkled his nose as semen spilled out from between his legs.

He was raped, he concluded simply. That's why he passed out… He shrugged to himself, deciding he'd wait until the kid woke up, ask him a couple questions, and go from there. He'd return him to his parents eventually, and that would be the end of it.

No problem whatsoever.

But when he turned to the rag tied over his eye, he hesitated. What could he be hiding? He shook his head and untied it, flinging it into the pile where the rest of his clothes lay.

He gasped despite himself at what he saw. Where the boy's left eye should have been was a dull, metal contraption that seemed to be fastened to his face. A few narrow streams of blood trickled out from beneath the things, and dark purple bruises bloomed around the rusted metal, as if boarding it. Sasori stared for a second before reaching out and touching the cool metal, running his fingers over it. It looked simple and yet complicated at the same time. He looked behind the wearer's head to see if there was some way to remove it, but there was no clip or button, or anything. It was just a part of his flesh, it seemed.

A little uneasy, Sasori carried him over to the bathroom and started the shower, placing him delicately in the stream of water. He kept his face away, not wanting to drown him but also not wanting to get his strange eye wet. He didn't know anything about it, whether something would happen or not if it got damp.

Sasori soothingly rubbed out all the lingering muck, realizing that when he was clean, the boy looked kind of…cute.

Shaking the thought from his head immediately, he turned off the water and slowly dried him off. He was still out cold when Sasori pulled one of his own shirts over his small frame. He was unbearably skinny, as if he hadn't eaten in months.

I wonder who raped him… He thought distantly, nestling the blonde into his bed and taking out a spare blanket and pillow so he could sleep on the floor. Definitely a perverted creep…who would do that to a little kid!?

He made sure his guest was comfortable before making a make-shift bed on the wooden floorboards at the foot of the bed.

Sasori fell asleep thinking of him.

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When Sasori awoke, he stretched groggily and checked on his blonde company. The boy was sitting upright, looking straight ahead in remote confusion.

"Hi," the redhead greeted warmly, standing up and sitting on the bed next to him. "What's your name?" He asked cautiously, and the kid turned towards him, his gaze sad. There were tears in his good eye, and Sasori felt the urge to reach out and brush them away.

"I don't know, un," he answered, his voice laced with desperation.

"You don't know?" Sasori cocked his head. "…who are your parents?"

"I don't know, un," he said again. Sasori frowned; he probably was just shocked about the other night and couldn't remember anything. If that was the case, he'd have to stay a little longer before Sasori could figure out what to do with him. He also pondered the "un" tacked to the end of his sentences.

"What school do you go to?" He asked.

The blonde repeated his previous answer.

"How old are you?"

The same answer again.

Finally, Sasori told him to stay put and he fled the room, troubled. He fished his phone out of his pocket and called the hospital, sighing with relief as he got Konan.

"Sasori?" She said cheerfully. "What's going on?" "I found this kid outside my door," he began hastily. "He passed out when I found him and I kept him at my place overnight. He was raped, recently too, and when he woke up he had no idea who he was or who his parents were, his age, nothing."

Konan was a specialist in children's health, and that was why Sasori knew her so well. She was a kind and understanding woman, who was calm and encouraging, knowing what to do in any given situation. She was the closest thing Sasori had to a real mother. He was about nine when his parents died from a accident. He had lived with his grandmother until he was 13, then he just couldn't take it anyone. His grandmother was a bitter, cruel old woman who was changed by her daughter's death, Sasori's mother. Of course, she didn't blame Sasori for that, but she was still hardened by her own self-pity. Sasori never knew why she decided to take care of him. Sasori didn't have any other relatives, but she still could have declined his entrance. But she didn't. However, Sasori couldn't stand living with her anymore. She didn't even hesitate to agree that Sasori leave. She gave him enough money to put a down-payment on a small apartment and buy some food for the month. He started going to serveral jobs a day while going to school, but he never once faltered. Sasori was stone-cold. He would no sooner break down than shoot himself. So he lived on his own for a year. He wasn't doing fantastic, but he wasn't doing terrible either. He could handle it all.

Konan was probably his only friend, the only person he trusted most in this world. He never heard of his grandmother again, and he didn't know if she was still alive. He didn't care.

He visited Konan mny times this past year, and not just for checkups and colds. Sasori went to the hospital in his free time and just hung around. Not many of the other doctors knew him, but they saw him around. They knew him as Konan's little friend who didn't talk much.

Many times, Konan had offered for him to move in with her, in her single apartment, but Sasori had refused. Konan had a life of her own, a busy job, and she was still single. He didn't need constant supervision, he liked being alone most of the time. Or he thought he did. He wondered if he really was quite lonely, but surpressed it with some sense of control. He wanted to be in control of everything.

"Bring him in," Konan said calmly, and Sasori felt a bit better knowing she was the one who would be looking after this strange person.

"Hey, kid!" He hung up and glided back into his room, getting tired of calling him "kid."

The blonde raised his head at the sound of Sasori's voice. The first voice he'd heard.

"Kid, un?" He said shakily, glancing down at himself. That's when he noticed he was wearing Sasori's shirt, and his hands flew up to his face where he fiddled around with his mechanical eye. He visibly cringed as his dainty fingers touched the bruises.

"What is that?" Sasori asked gently, daring to cover the boy's hands, lifting them away from his cheek.

"I-I don't know, un…" The expected reply, but this time he sounded irritated, like he was upset he didn't know.

"Here, don't worry," Sasori soothed, wondering why he was being so kind and loving. Well, what was he supposed to do? Shout and yell at a little kid who didn't remember who he was, and had recently been raped? He wouldn't do that, despite his mistrust for strangers.

He extended his arms, and the blonde instinctively crawled into them. The embrace was warm and comforting.

Sasori awkwardly took him down the steps to the sidewalk, and he didn't think he could walk. So he had to carry him all the way down to the hospital. It was right around the corner, thankfully.

They walked in complete silence. Sasori constantly wrenched his gaze down to make sure the boy was okay. He felt like a parent who's child had caught a cold, but the only problem was that he had no idea who this child was.

When they arrived at the hospital, Konan was promptly waiting for them in the waiting room. Suspicious gazes looked up at them, and Sasori tried to ignore them. They probably thought he was dragging in his long lost brother from a deadly car crash. He mentally scoffed.

Konan nodded at Sasori before lowering her eyes to the blonde in his arms. She smiled at him, but he made no sign that he even saw her. He was looking at her, but more like past her.

When she pushed her way down the hallway with the pair closely following there, they were joined by two other women; a timid looking brunette and an obnoxious pink-haired girl who looked too…small to be older than Sasori was.

"This is Shizune and Sakura," Konan introduced them without pausing in her now-speedy walking. They turned a corner and Konan led them into a vacant room with one window, the curtains closed. A tiny cot supported by wheels sat in the corner, a sink to the right. It seemed too...ordinary for their situation.

"Let them ask him a couple questions," Konan said, gesturing for Shizune to pry the blonde from Sasori's grasp. He gave him up unwillingly, eyeing the two suspiciously. Shizune gave him a reassuring nod, but he wasn't convinced.

"Can I talk to you for a second?" Konan muttered, dragging Sasori out of the room and quietly shutting the door.

When they were unseen, Konan sighed and kissed Sasori chastely on the cheek, then hugged him longer.

"You've never seen him before?" She asked, all business now. Sasori felt a little unnerved by leaving the boy alone with people he had never met before, but he dismissed his concerns and concentrated on Konan.

"No," he said sadly. "I have no idea who he is."

"You said he was raped…" Konan put her finger to her lip, absorbed in her own musings.

"Yes."

"Do you know who it was?"

"No."

"He just showed up at your door?"

"Uh huh. I didn't get so much as five words in before he passed out."

"How do you know he was raped?" Sasori shot her a lock

"There was semen all over him and he had bite marks on his neck," Sasori folded him arms defiantly, uncomfortable with recalling all this, even if it was to report it back to Konan. It disgusted him, knowing that there was someone out there who would do such a thing to an innocent little kid. "That cut it? Go look at him now."

"Right, right, right…" Konan drifted off into though again, staring at the ceiling, not put off in the slightest by Sasori's scathing tongue.

"What you are going to do about it?" Sasori demanded.

"Get a file on him," Konan said. They stood in tense silence for a while, until they heard a loud thud on the other side of the door.

They walked in to see Shizune rubbing the unconscious blonde's back, trying to make him come to.

"What happened?" Sasori questioned warily, stepping forward and shooing Shizune aside, replacing his hand on the boy's back with his own.

"I don't know!" Shizune cried. "We didn't even touch him!"

"What did you ask him?" Konan inquired, directing this at Sakura.

"What his name was, parents, age, things like that," Sakura replied.

"Tell me exactly what you did."

"We didn't say anything for a bit, we were writing things down, and his eyes got wide and his whole body was shaking, and then he just...fell over." Konan pursed her lips.

Sasori comfortably kept his hand on his back, rubbing it soothingly until his eyes fluttered open. He had only been out a couple minutes.

The boy straightened up, coughing. Sakura handed him a cup of water which he quickly downed before nodding his thanks.

"We'll get his file now, his DNA and everything," Konan told Sasori. "Then give him a proper physical…oh, and Sasori?" She leaned in close to his ear. "Thanks for keeping him with you." Sasori was about to argue, but his throat went dry. He had nothing to argue about.

He followed the women, who were guiding Deidara to another, more secluded, room, like he was a newborn baby and they were protecting him from the world. He could understand that; women were naturally motherly, no matter how much they hated kids. It was just their instinct. Both Shizune and Sakura had one hand on his back, and Konan walked behind them. Sasori felt lost at the back of that shielding line, watching. He had brought the blonde in, shouldn't he be a part of it?

Then again, why did he even care?

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"Deidara!" Konan announced proudly, a single piece of paper in her hand. "His name is Deidara."

"Does he have a last name?" Sasori asked, shifting his gaze to see Deidara through the large glass window, sitting in a chair much too large for him. Sakura stood next to him, talking to him about something Sasori couldn't hear. He didn't seem to be paying attention.

"Not on record," Konan said. "His parents don't have names either, all I know is they died when Deidara was about eight. He's ten now. The DNA match of his parents is absolute, though."

"Why don't you have their names?"

"They were outlaws, their real names were never filed. We're not sure they even had birth certificates."

"Why were they outlaws?"

"They built weapons and other machinery with special uses, but used them from evil purposes. Human experiments, murders, things like that." Sasori crossed his arms. What a life to live, parents as crazy murderers. Where had he been for the two years he was alone?

"Any other relatives?"

"None whatsoever." So he had noplace to go, somewhat like Sasori himself. But Deidara was younger, and seemed to be timid. He couldn't live on his own.

"How did they die?" Konan shrugged.

"Their bodies were discovered years after their actual deaths, hidden in what used to be house. It's strange, I remember them being on the news, and running from place to place. They were never caught. I thought it was impossible, that two murderers, such insane murderers, could be so crafty with where they hid. When they were finally found, the house had been burned down, all evidence lost. They were burn to a crisp. I never knew they'd had a child."

"Deidara doesn't remember any of this? Why?"

"Amnesia, I suppose. I assume he was wandering around by himself for years until you were kind enough to bring him in." Sasori snorted. A kid, running around in the bustling city without a home or memory. He wasn't kind, it was common sense.

"What are we going to do?" Konan sighed, following Sasori's eyes through the window at Deidara.

"He has no where to go, Sasori," she said softly. "We could keep him here until he regains his memory, but I don't think this is the proper place to keep a child of his age." Sasori ignored her implementation, instead asking another question. He wanted all the information he could get; this Deidara was stealing his attention. What a horrible life he must have had, orphaned when he was so young and left to fend for himself…especially when his parents were so…wanted.

"What's that metal eye?" He knew he had hit a still hidden discovery with that, because Konan closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose with her fingers.

"I don't know," she said at last, exhaling deeply. "We'll have to get professionals to inspect it, maybe take it apart. But I'm afraid he won't let us touch him if he's in a place like this. Besides, this is a hospital. We have other patients. If it's not completely necessary for him to stay, we won't allow it."

"And that's why you want me to keep him," Sasori finished glumly. "Listen, Konan, I don't know." He knew he'd feel guilty about it later, but he just couldn't handle a kid right now. He had to keep up with his job, paying his rent, and he liked his solitude. Sure, he had been a bit taken by Deidara, but he was just to complicated to be watched over.

He took a deep breath, trying to clear his thoughts.

"Only for a little while!" Konan pleaded, handing him the paper she had been holding. He looked it over without answering her. May 15, 1999. Deidara had turned ten just a month ago, and that made Sasori feel strangely dismal. Where had he been on that day?

"I don't know how to take care of a ten year old child!" He whined, but discretely slipped Deidara's paper into his pocket. "I can't afford it! And how do I know he's not crazy like his parents!?" Konan withdrew like she had been stung, and Sasori looked away; he knew that wasn't true, he was just making up excuses.

"Does he look like a damn murderer to you?" She snapped. "He's a little boy who can't remember his own name! He's probably on the verge of completely breaking! I'll give you all the money you need! Please, Sasori, don't you feel just a little bit bad for him?"

"Of course I do!" Sasori spat. He knew exactly how Deidara felt. He knew it was unusual for a teenager to buy an apartment, go to school, and hold down a job at the same time. Adding Deidara would just make his life harder. At least it was the summer, and he wouldn't have to attend school every single day. "But…tell me what you plan to do with him. Don't expect him to just move in with me forever." He wasn't agreeing to anything yet.

"I'll expect him to come in frequently for examinations, and we'll start on his eye. He has a few cuts and bruises, but nothing serious. He'll have to get his memory back on his own, but I'm hoping you can help him."

"Help him?"

"If you develop a strong enough relationship, maybe it'll g-"

"A strong enough relationship?!" Sasori repeated in exasperation, getting to his feet and brushing past Konan. "You expect be to get involved with an ten year old kid?"

"I didn't say that…" Konan mumbled, looking at her feet. "I meant…just a friendship…"

"Yes, a friendship," Sasori said curtly, turning the handle on the door that was confining Deidara. He hesitated in opening it. "Konan, he can stay for one week."

"Oh, thank you Sasori!" Konan squealed, clapping her hands in delight. "You won't regret it!" Sasori muttered something under his breath before pushing on the door.

"M-my name, un?" Deidara breathed, and Sasori noticed he wasn't going to be giving up that "un" thing anytime soon. What could that possibly be about? Did he do it on purpose?

Sighing, he realized he'd have to get used it since they were going to be living together.

He shuddered.

Living together.

"It's Deidara," Sasori told him, plastering a smile on his face, blocking the comprehension on what he had just done. He wouldn't tell Deidara about his parents, even if he asked. As Konan said, he should regain his memory on his own. Having someone tell him wouldn't be the same. And besides, Sasori doubted that Deidara would appreciate knowing what his parents were.

"Deidara, un…" He looked thoughtful, and Sakura helped him off the chair, ushering him to Sasori.

"I'm Sasori," he said clumsily. It felt weird introducing himself like this, he hadn't met anyone knew in a very long time.

"Sasori," Deidara smiled, but the redhead could see the pain behind the mask. The uncertainty, the disappointment. "Where am I going, un?"

"Home with me," Sasori responded, staring at Deidara's unfolded hand at his side.

"Really, un?" He nodded politely at Sakura and starting walking, not waiting for Sasori to follow.

Konan ruffled his hair as he left the room, but he paid it no mind. He also only provided a simple nod at Shizune. Sasori noticed his politeness with contempt.

When Sasori passed Konan, she grinned sympathetically.

"You'll be okay," she mouthed, and he just scowled at her. "Call me if you need anything!"

The four year difference between them suddenly seemed so much bigger.


A/N: I am a terrible person. I revised this chapter and replaced it because I didn't like the lack of important details. I was watching a really awesome episode of House, and all of a sudden I thought, OMGEE! I need to make this more specific! So here I am.
I tried not to make Deidara as OOC as I wanted, but it's hard to write him as an abused child. So I just made him the way I wanted, so there!
I hope you like it. Please review!

~ The Cupcake Monster