Concave Screams
Inspired by James O'Barr's "The Crow"
Deep, here within my heart,
Where I don't want to be,
Unfolds our lives, in happiness
But only I can see.
I close my eyes, but I still see
You're dancing in my mind.
In life, you've passed so far away,
Now I've been left behind.
So, it is, I spiral down
Through my collapsed dream,
And the only sound that I can make
Is like a concave scream.
Alone, I sit with images
That haunt me everyday,
These are dreams that I've fought for,
They're words I cannot say.
There have been times I've wept and begged,
"Just let these feelings die."
Life killed all that I dreamed for us,
Yet never told me why.
Now I fall ever deeper,
Bleeding from shards of shattered dreams,
My growing anguish gets too hard to take
Like the echoes of my concave screams.
In simple flashes, black and white,
Our life of love replays,
They never happened, but I still cry
In mourning for the wasted days.
Together we were perfect,
But the truth is, we never tried.
All my hopes, they lived in you
And in you, they have died.
Further down, much deeper
And more painful than it seems,
You may think that I'm smiling,
But I'm still crying concave screams.
The smell of your hair, our "eternity",
Words can't describe my pain.
Your arms embrace me tight. So tight
While you take shelter from the rain.
And in the dreams, the sunlight
Dances on your skin.
Your smile, your eyes, your hair, your hands,
Oh God, why can't I win?
And now life gets much darker,
Makes nightmares of my dreams.
They're deafening me, please say you'll hear
The rising concave screams.
And with you, I would wander,
Your lips move as you talk
But of your voice, there's not a sound,
And around us, shadows stalk.
Reality screws it up again,
The cold world soon returns,
And in your absence, laughter sounds,
While the dream around me burns.
I try to run and hide away
From all my dying dreams.
In a concave echo of my voice
They give their haunting screams.
As I close myself in the sweetest dream,
My mind's voice starts to flow;
"You long for happiness that cannot be,
Why torture yourself so?"
I clutch my head and close my eyes
And desperately take flight,
As in my mind I rise in peace,
To watch you sleeping in the night.
Too soon it fades and breaks away,
And I wake from my soul's dreams
To cruelty, anguish, hate, despair
And the sound of concave screams.
Now I stand here all alone,
The man that love deserted.
In this heart, no blood now pumps,
Hate's venom long since inserted.
Vengeful, rampant, silent, cold,
A prisoner of my mind.
I've tried so hard to break my chains,
My love keeps me confined.
A hostage to your memory,
A scarred heart fools itself with dreams.
Bleeding inside, from the deepest wound
The tide of blood marks concave screams.
Without you in my life, I dread
This dream may never end.
And like the passing of the light,
You've passed me by, dear friend.
I break. In fact, I'm broken,
Come back, don't leave my side,
From now until forever,
For you, my love has never died.
So lift me with your angel's wings,
Make reality of my dreams.
If you could just love me now,
There'll be no more concave screams.
~Misfit~
"The hand is no different from what it creates." - James O'Barr