All I Want for Christmas
(Author's Note: An early Christmas present for those of you who enjoy the B.J.-Hawkeye-Erin stories, and especially those who take the time to tell me so.)
The line moved forward a couple of feet. Hawkeye smiled down at Erin, who was holding onto his hand intently. "See that? We just moved a little closer. It won't be much longer."
"But is Santa really up there, Hawkeye? I can't see him."
"Your view is just blocked by all these people in front of us, Erin. He's up there, don't worry." Hawkeye stood on his tippy-toes. "I can see him."
"You can? You're tall enough to see him?" Erin for some reason sounded doubtful. "Daddy always says he's taller than you are."
Damn that Hunnicutt. Competitive even in matters of height. "Your daddy does have an inch or two on me, that's true," Hawkeye admitted, "but even so, I can see to the front of this line, where Mr. Santa Claus himself sits greeting little kids. We'll get there soon." He heard a hint of frustration in his own voice, so he added sweetly, "You're being a very patient little girl."
They shuffled forward a few feet again.
"Do you know what you're going to say to him?" Hawkeye asked.
Erin nodded.
"Just tell him what you would like to get for Christmas, but go easy on him. He has a lot of kids to deliver presents to."
"OK, Hawkeye."
"And be polite when you're talking to him. Say 'please' and 'thank you.' He keeps lists, you know, and you certainly don't want Erin Hunnicutt's name showing up on his 'naughty' list."
"No sir."
Once again they moved two steps forward. To Hawkeye it was the most painful queue he'd had to stand in since the chow line at the good ol' 4077th.
Suddenly Erin started looking every which way, her pigtails flying as she whipped her head around. "Hawkeye? Where are Santa's reindeer? I don't see them anywhere."
Hawkeye made a show of looking around as well, then said, "Hmm, I don't see them either. Well you know what? I'll bet they're outside."
"Outside?" Erin looked up at him, her face positively adorable in her innocence.
"Think about it," Hawkeye said. "I'll bet the store manager didn't want Santa's reindeer inside the store. I mean, what if they had to poop? He wouldn't want them pooping in his store, right?"
She considered that briefly. "I guess," she allowed. Hawkeye sighed, but it was a short-lived relief. She wasn't going to let this go quite so easily. "So can we look for the reindeer when we go back outside? I want to pet Rudolph."
Hawkeye fell back on that old stand-by: "We'll see." Maybe he'd get lucky and she'd forget all about Rudolph and his friends by the time they were leaving the store. At the rate this line was moving, that wouldn't be anytime soon, anyway.
The little boy currently sitting on Santa's lap let out a loud wail, and his mother swooped in to rescue him from the terror of talking to dear ol' Saint Nick. The line inched forward.
"Getting tired?" Hawkeye asked his little charge, especially since her formerly tight grip of his hand had gone a little slack.
"Nope," she denied, but he could tell she was. She was a determined little girl, though, and he knew she'd hang in there long enough to see Santa and make her demands.
But by the time they were second in line (second!), he was holding Erin in his arms and she was dozing. When the little girl in front of them finished with Santa (giving him a goodbye kiss on the cheek yet), Hawkeye jostled Erin in his arms. "Wake up, sweetie. It's your turn—we made it."
He put her down and she rubbed her eyes, yawned. "Hi Santa," she said, but there wasn't much enthusiasm in her voice. Now the whole thing seemed rather like a task to get over and done with. She fumbled her way forward and the store Santa picked her up, set her on his knee.
"How are you, my young friend?" he asked, adding a "ho ho ho" seemingly as an afterthought.
"OK."
"You look sleepy. I'm sorry the wait in line has been so long."
She shrugged, her eyes looking very droopy indeed. "My name is Erin Hunnicutt," she began an apparently rehearsed speech, "and I live in Mill Valley."
"Hello, Erin. Have you been a good girl this year?"
"Oh yes, sir," she said and looked to Hawkeye for confirmation.
Hawkeye smiled at the big fella. "All sugar and spice, Santa."
"Ho ho ho, well that's mighty good to hear. What would you like Santa to bring you for Christmas, Erin?"
She rattled off her requests without even thinking it over. "I want a Slinky toy, please, and a new Betsy doll because my dog made bite marks on my old one." As she spoke, Hawkeye made mental notes, although she'd mentioned the Slinky toy a couple of times before, so he and B.J. were already aware of that particular item. So far, piece of cake. "Oh, and a puppy dog too, please. I think my dog Waggle would like to have someone new to play with, and so would I."
Oh shit, Hawkeye thought… a puppy? He couldn't imagine any scenario where they'd be able to get a puppy, not with the hours that he and B.J. worked and all the attention and supervision a puppy required. Santa must've seen the look of panic on Hawkeye's face, because he gently said to Erin, "Well, Santa doesn't really like to give pets or any living thing for Christmas, even if you are the best little girl in the world. Pets are a big responsibility, and getting one is something that you have to talk to your mommy and daddy about."
Exhaling a breath he hadn't known he was holding, Hawkeye gave the guy a wink. Bless you, Santa!
Erin only shrugged, as if she were thinking, oh well, it was worth a try.
"Is that all, Erin?" Santa prompted, perhaps taken aback that she stopped at only three requests, and one of them an impossibility.
"Yes sir," she nodded. She rubbed at her eyes again. Either she was too tired to remember her full list or she was spoiled rotten by her dads all year long and didn't need much at Christmastime. Hawkeye had to admit it was probably the latter.
"All right, then," Santa said, setting her back on her feet and handing her a candy cane. "I will see what I can do. You have a Merry Christmas, OK? Ho ho ho!"
"Thank you."
Erin took Hawkeye's hand again and they walked away, Hawkeye giving a wave over his shoulder to the store Santa. "You did great, Erin!" he gushed. "Wasn't that fun? Getting to meet Santa?"
She nodded but it was perfunctory.
"Are you beat, sweetie? Do you want to go home and take a nap?"
Again she nodded, but this time she meant it. "But first," she said, perking up a little, starting to pull on his arm, "I want to go see the reindeer. OK?"
Hawkeye cast his gaze to the ceiling as they headed toward the exit. He had a fantastic imagination, but even he couldn't fathom how he was going to get out of this one.
"So what did you do?" B.J. asked late that night as he joined Hawkeye in bed, debriefing him in more ways than one.
"When we got outside and there were no reindeer to be found, I told her they must be visiting relatives while Santa was in the store."
B.J. laughed and draped a leg over Hawkeye's, cuddling close. "Visiting relatives."
Hawkeye shrugged. "She bought it. But then again, she was pretty wiped out by that point, so I had exhaustion on my side."
"Lucky for you. OK then," B.J. summarized, "just a Slinky and a new Betsy doll. Our kid is much too easy to please."
Hawkeye leaned in and stole a kiss before replying, "Unless you want to get her a puppy too."
B.J. stole that kiss right back again. "I'll leave that up to Peg and Joe. Maybe they can adopt a puppy, but we sure can't."
"Agreed." Just when he didn't think it was possible for their bodies to get any closer, Hawkeye rubbed up against his lover and sighed, enjoying the friction. "Don't worry, we'll find plenty more to get her once we start looking around the toy store."
B.J. nodded, his eyes closing as the snuggling became more heated. "I only have one question," he mumbled into Hawkeye's shoulder. One of his hands settled on Hawkeye's ass and rubbed a little.
"Hmm?"
"Since you didn't get to sit on Santa's lap, you can just tell me... what do you want for Christmas, little boy?"
Hawkeye let out a deep throaty growl of a laugh, and then put his mouth to B.J.'s ear and whispered.
B.J. laughed too, rolling on top of his lover and promising, "Oh, I can definitely make those wishes come true."
No need to wait for Christmas, though. He got started right away.
