(A/N: My friend TwilighterluvsEdward and I got the idea of what would happen if a vamp drank a drunk person's blood. Don't bother to ask why we had the thought, because that is a whole other story, and right now we are writing about Twilight parodies.)
James' eyes were coal black as he prowled, tempted around the house of a group of partying teenagers. Some were getting drunk while others were lighting up a magic leaf smokes. (PS Magic leaves are tobacco, and other leafy types of drugs. It is just a funny name I have for it.) Their blood was smelled more intoxicating by the second. Finally, he couldn't resist and jumped through the window.
Clearly the teens had had more of the drugs and alcohol then they needed. Not that they needed any at all.
A boy with short spiky hair and baggy eyes walked up to him and said holding up a new cigarette, "Yo, bro you wanna light?"
"No," James said as he tilted his head in a way that made him look like a dog begging for food. "I want a snack."
The boy had no clue of what James was really talking about. "There are crackers, chips, and apparently toast…" the boy looked over to a native American boy who was stroking a piece of toast and looking at it as if it was the first and most beautiful thing he had ever seen in his whole entire life. "And if you're thirsty there's beer."
" Oh, I am SO thirsty!" James said enthusiastically.
" Then help yourself. It's not like it's my job." the boy nodded at an ice chest.
"Not for beer, though." he said.
"There is a gas station down the block with sodas." the guy pointed out.
"I'm not thirsty for that either…"
"Coffee?"
"Nope."
"Juice?" the boy wondered.
"Uh uh." said James.
"A smoothie?"
For ten whole minutes the boy James met questioned him about drinks he would like for example : wine, water, Shirley Temples, and martinis. Finally, his thirst got the best of him and James grew angry. He had to stop playing with his food as usual. " NO!!!!! I AM NOT THIRSTY FOR ANY OF THOSE DRINKS!!!!!! I AM THIRSTY FOR YOU!!!!!!!!!!!"
" That's just wrong dude, and to think I stood here welcoming you to my party and putting up with you even when I am completely hung over. I am interested in girls." (A/N: I am not discriminating gay people. I am completely okay with it. The guy James is talking to isn't. Team Edcob 4 Life & TwilighterluvsEdward are fine with who people choose to like.)
James growled and pulled the weak boy at the speed of light so nobody even saw him. James bit into his skin without bothering to be careful enough to make sure his blood didn't spill.
A closer look: The blood from the drunken boy flowed into James, alcohol and all. James began to feel a little excited, powerful, crazy, and slightly woozy.
That night James encountered a family of vegetarian vampires and wanted to play baseball with them. He noticed a human girl with the family and got a little ahead of himself. Let that just be the story behind the story of why James wanted Bella so badly.
Copyrighted on 07/30/09 My Birthday!!!!!
