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Clarification

It was a grey and rainy Saturday evening and as Daidouji Tomoyo walked up to Sakura and Li's house, she was grateful to have friends with a nice, warm home. With some anxiety she knocked on the door twice and waited for someone to answer. Sakura did just that a moment later, and Tomoyo found herself engulfed in a tight hug. "Tomoyo-chan! I'm so happy you could come!"

The dark haired woman shrugged out of her damp coat and gave it to Li with a smile and her thanks. The cozy light of their home surrounded her and there were delicious smells wafting from the kitchen. Tomoyo suddenly felt almost drowsy - she thought she could probably sit on the couch and fall asleep; that is, if her heart weren't pounding so fast. "I'm happy to be here, Sakura-chan."

Sakura moved behind her to greet someone else in the entryway so Tomoyo meandered through the house to the kitchen. She hoped she could get a drink of some kind. Her mouth was dry and the rest of her was cold. Smiling at Naoko, who was conversing demurely with a man Tomoyo had never seen before, she acknowledge the fact that he wasn't here. She thought he would be, but he wasn't yet and her heart calmed somewhat. She knew he was in town and there was very good chance that she would see him tonight. For now, though, she could relax.

Twenty minutes later, Naoko had loosened up and was now talking to the unknown man quite animatedly. Tomoyo had struck up conversation by the fireplace with Touya and Yukito and was feeling increasingly unburdened. He wasn't here - and neither Sakura nor Li had mentioned that he was planning on attending. She had assumed and it seemed as though she had done so incorrectly. She smiled and nodded at something Sakura's brother had said and then excused herself politely in order to get more to drink. She was still thirsty and the warmth of the fire in the living room was making her feel quite warm. As she poured herself a glass of water, she suddenly thought of Yamazaki-kun. How long was it seen they'd seen each other? Turning around, she searched the next room for him and found him talking with a dark haired man. Her heart clenched in her chest.

Tomoyo, usually unfalteringly polite, turned in the other direction and started talking to the nearest person, who happened to be Meiling. She actually was very happy to reconnect with the Chinese girl, she only wished it could have been under other circumstances. As it was, Tomoyo found it difficult to concentrate on anything Li's cousin was saying. He was here. Dear God, she hadn't seen him in three years and now he was across the room, talking to a high school friend. He must have seen her; was she avoiding him or was he avoiding her? It was difficult to tell. Although, now that she thought about it (as Meiling talked excitedly about her fiance back in China) she didn't think Eriol was the type to avoid someone.

"Congratulations Meiling," she heard herself say, and she really did mean it but she didn't think she was doing a very good job of conveying it. She tried to ignore his presence as much as she could and instead chose to focus on the happy girl in front of her. "When are you getting married?"

"Next spring," she replied with a grin. "We wished for this winter, but it's just too soon. I didn't realize there was so much to plan for!"

"I can imagine," was all she said. There was a pang of jealousy in her stomach that she ignored. "I wish you all the best. It's very exciting news."

"It is," Meiling agreed. "Which reminds me - I told him I'd call him this evening. We'll continue catching up later on, Tomoyo-chan!"

Tomoyo, now devoid of a conversationalist, had no choice but to look for another one. She glanced around the room once, noticed that both Eriol and Yamazaki-kun were absent, and set out to find either Sakura or Li. Maybe Sakura needed help with something? Most likely. She made her way to the stairs leading upstairs; she had seen Sakura bound up there not long ago with an armful of coats. She placed her hand on the banister only to feel someone tap her on the shoulder. As a reflex, she turned.

"Tomoyo-san," was his way of greeting her. She wrung her hands together and inwardly hated that she was outwardly nervous.

"Hello Hiiragizawa-kun," she managed to choke out. Her hands smoothed out her blouse and then fell at her sides. "How are you?"

"Better, now that I'm speaking with you," his blue eyes glinted at her as he gave her an admittedly charming smile. She rolled her eyes at him and crossed her arms beneath her breasts. "I've been trying to get you alone ever since I saw you with Touya and Yukito."

She glanced around her briefly and noticed that they were indeed very alone. Quite a feat in a small house with a lot of people. "It would seem as though you accomplished that."

"Yes," he agreed. His tone turned more serious a second later. More serious and somehow more urgent. "You look really good, Tomoyo-san."

She tried to ignore the warmth that settled in her stomach at his words. She also tried to ignore the part of her that thought the same about him. He looked similar to the way he had three years ago. Tall, blue-eyed, dark-haired and broad-shouldered. "Thank you, but I was just on my way to see if Sakura needed anyth-"

"Sakura doesn't need anything," he interjected smoothly, grasping her waist gently to him as she pulled away. "I just checked on her. I want to talk to you."

"Interesting," she commented mockingly. Suddenly she felt almost violent towards him; to her, violent and angry were two mostly foreign emotions. "We didn't talk at all in the three years you were in England."

"I'm not in England anymore," he replied in a low voice.

"It doesn't matter," she said just as quietly. "You kissed me and left."

He groaned as she escaped to find Sakura.

Eriol opted not to follow her. He ran a hand through his inky hair before readjusting his rectangular glasses. If she calmed down, maybe she would be more willing to talk later on. He headed in the opposite direction, and as luck would have it, came across Li who was loitering by the doorway. He raised his eyebrows at the chocolate haired man. Eriol received the same action in response.

"Yes?" he asked irritably. After his conversation with Tomoyo, he wasn't much in the mood for being coy. Although, upon reflection, did he really think it would have gone any differently? Of course she would have been hurt. He really was an idiot. A cowardly idiot. Thankfully, Li seemed to sense his mood and only offered him a drink in silence. Eriol grasped the bottle gratefully before twisting off the cap. Li left him after that.

Normally, he would save the brooding for another time and continue on with the party. Tonight, however, he was content to find a space (in the study, actually - that would be a good place - it was empty) and sulk. He did just that and sat on the edge of the guest futon. His imagination hurtled into the future where maybe he and Tomoyo would sleep on this very futon some night, because it was late and the roads were in awful conditions for driving. Ideally, if that ever happened, she wouldn't be mad at him. His mind shut down at that point before he allowed himself to go any further, and he swiftly thought of something else.

His move to Japan. That was as good a topic as anything else. The sale of his apartment in London had just gone through a few weeks ago and everything he owned had been shipped over. The first night he spent in his new home he realized that he had moved to Japan to settle. It wasn't as extensive as his old manor; it was smaller but charming and had four floors. After he bought it, he thought maybe it was the type of place that Tomoyo would love. Yes, he thought to himself, there was no going back to England.

The next person to stumble across him was Sakura. She popped her head into the study with a cheerful smile to inquire if she could get him anything. She spoke as though she had no idea what was going on between him and her best friend. He couldn't help but make an effort to smile back at her and tell her he was fine, although he wondered if she really did know. On one hand, she often knew more than she divulged. On the other hand, Tomoyo was a fairly private person.

Not long after her brief visit, Sakura returned to mention that dinner was ready. Making his way to the dining room, Eriol searched for dark hair and pale skin. Even as he took a plate and got in line to fill it, there was still no sign for her. Did she leave? How awful would that be? They had spoken for all of three minutes and that was all he was going to get?

"Eriol-kun, will you go tell Tomoyo-chan that dinner is ready? She just stepped outside to answer a phone call," Sakura requested while sticking spoons into the various dishes on the table. Putting down his plate, he acquiesced. He wanted to talk to her again, but was it too soon? Probably, but he couldn't stay away from her.

He opened the back door quietly and stepped out to see her not ten feet from him. She was facing the garden and it was darker now than it was when he arrived.

"Okay, okaasan...yes," Tomoyo turned to face him as she felt him approach. "I'll talk to you later."

She hung up and before she could say anything he rushed to tell her, "Dinner is ready."

"Perfect," she said as she moved around him. Frankly, he didn't care at all if it was too soon. Their previous talk had been incomplete and he was determined to remedy that. He grasped her wrist and she froze.

"Tomoyo-san," he said brokenly. "Please."

She turned to look at him and he faltered under her intense gaze. He could now see that she was still quite clearly hurt. He floundered for some explanation and it came out as, "I didn't mean to hurt you."

"You did hurt me," she said evenly, "and I want to know - right now - why you kissed me. At the airport. While the others were getting coffee."

Her words had risen in volume toward the end of her sentence and Eriol tried to calm her by rubbing her arm soothingly. She shrugged him off and he tried not to take offense. "Ten minutes before you boarded! You kissed me!"

Something in him snapped. "You enjoyed it!" he said loudly in exasperation. He reached for her waist and drew her to him so they were joined tightly together. He almost growled his next words. "Just like this."

Tomoyo gasped at his words or his actions, and it was probably both that made her shove him away. She pointed at him furiously. "Do not make this about me. This is not my fault. You kissed me, and I didn't hear from you again! How selfish are you?"

"Not very selfish," he said, thinking of his recent move to Japan. If she only knew. He guessed that she would find out very shortly.

"Tell me why you kissed me, right now."

He paused before admitting aloud to her, and to himself, what had driven him that day. "It just felt right."

Evidently, that wasn't what she was expecting to hear. Her lips parted slightly and she looked a little like a wild animal who was ready to run at any moment. He didn't say anything more but twisted her hair through his fingers and allowed himself to enjoy her closeness. He missed her so much.

She pulled back a moment later and Eriol was forced to release her. She echoed him almost disbelievingly. "It felt right."

"It felt too right," he said, aching for her. "It scared me. I had Kaho waiting for me in London. What was I supposed to do?"

"I don't know," Tomoyo admitted, moving slightly closer to him. "I was confused. I still am confused."

"I was here for three weeks. I couldn't move to Japan for a feeling that developed over three weeks. My friends were in London, my home was in London. My life was in London. It would have been impractical for me to make a move at that time. I'm sorry Tomoyo-san, for hurting you."

His hands on her waist were working their way under her blouse but it seemed as though she didn't mind. On the contrary, her hands on his shoulders seemed meant to encourage him. She observed quietly, "You're here now."

"Yes," he agreed. Her skin was so warm as he massaged her with his fingers. "and I don't plan on leaving."

She tangled one of her hands in his hair to draw his head down so their lips could meet. Somewhere in the back of his mind, as he moved his lips against hers and licked her bottom lip, he knew that dinner was ready. He also knew that someone was going to come looking for them. He broke away and looked at her intently for any signs that he had done something wrong. He was happy to find there were none. He kissed her again, briefly but with feeling, before linking their hands together. He led her to the door just as Li opened it.

"It took you long enough, Hiiragizawa." Eriol raised his eyebrows in surprise - what exactly was Li alluding to? Did he know? "Now come in. Your dinner is getting cold."