Title: French Maid Shizuo! (because I'm an extremely lazy authoress who can't be bothered to think of anything more original for a title)
Rating: R? Hell if I know. Sexual situations (all-out buttsecks is only in the last two chapters or so) and language.
Pairing: It's Tom x Shizuo, but that's just a cover up because this was just an excuse for me to write Everyone x Shizuo. :D In a French maid costume.
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Summary: Response to the Drrr! Kink Meme on LJ. Shizuo lost a bet so now he has to walk around in a French maid costume while everyone around him perves over how short his skirt is and how pretty his ass looks. Tom x Shizuo, Everyone x Shizuo.
Note: This was supposed to be a kink meme response, but since I'm in a hospital right now and the bloody WiFi has blocked LJ, I'm posting it here instead, for now. :D. And yes, I realize that I am a horrible, horrible person for not updating any of my fics and now after three freaking years of being a no-show, I have the gall to show up in an altogether different fandom?
There's no words to express how sorry I am, so I'm just hoping that you'll all read this and be satisfied with me (for now). Just know that I've written this whole story non-stop until the end, so I'm definitely finished with this! Which means I'm not going to stop halfway through and lose interest (like the rest of my fics –hangs head in shame-).
Chapter I
Shizuo hated getting drunk.
Getting drunk meant he ended up doing a lot of stupid things that he always regretted later on. It was bad enough that his alcohol tolerance wasn't very high. It was worse when he'd found out that he was an easy drunk.
According to Shinra, Shizuo was a very happy drunk. His short temper rarely reared its ugly head while he was inebriated. In fact, if that one memory he had of waking up with a massive hangover in Shinra's apartment (his body aching in several unmentionable parts) was anything to go by, he was extremely friendly when he was drunk.
Which was why Shizuo avoided alcohol wherever possible.
It was, therefore, incredibly stupid of him when he agreed to have a few drinks with Kadota and his gang one fairly uneventful evening in Ikebukuro.
Kadota's gang had been celebrating some weird convention that had something to do with prepubescent angels fighting crime (or something, Shizuo had no idea what they were squealing about) that had been held in Ikebukuro just that afternoon and they had been in a good enough mood that they'd invited Shizuo to join them when he'd stumbled upon their merry-making.
Shizuo didn't know why he said yes (it probably had something to do with Kadota looking pleadingly at him because he couldn't handle the three rabid fans on his own and the fact that Kadota had always been on Shizuo's good side, anyway) but they'd ended up in a bar together not too long after. Predictably, Shizuo lost track of everything going on around him after two shots of tequila.
And somehow, their laughing and joking ended up with everyone betting on some stupid thing. That Shizuo lost.
Seriously, he didn't even know what they'd been betting about, but it hardly mattered, because the bottom line was Shizuo never backed out on a bet. Especially when the bet was made with a woman (even if said woman was someone who acted like a rabid teenage fangirl most of the time).
So now, now Shizuo was trapped inside a bathroom in Erica's apartment, staring at a French maid costume, cursing Izaya (because that flea must've had something to do with this, he was sure about it!) to hell and back.
"Shizuo-saan! Are you done yet?" Erica sang from the other room.
Shizuo jumped at the sound of her voice and cursed out loud.
"Shut up!" he shouted back, glaring at the outfit he held in his hands.
It was ugly, the ugliest thing he'd ever set eyes on, and the skirt was disgustingly short and frilly and honestly, why the fuck had he even gone drinking with them?
"If you're having trouble with the zipper, I could always come in-"
"NO."
Shizuo heard her disappointed 'kyaa' and ignored it, taking a deep breath to calm himself down. If that crazy girl didn't shut up, she was going to have to find a new door soon.
Thankfully, she did, so Shizuo managed to gather enough courage to actually lift the outfit up to get a better look at it. He was seriously rethinking his principles when he noticed that it had a choker along with the whole thing. His dignity was not worth his honour. Was it? They might've been the same thing...
Damn it, if only Erica was a guy. Then at least Shizuo'd get to beat her up.
It was another half hour before Shizuo even began taking off his clothes. Another half for him to get the damn thing on. Just as he'd thought, the skirt was fucking short. It barely reached down to mid-thigh, so his boxers were visible enough that it looked like he was wearing shorts underneath.
At least the collar wasn't low but the lace around the three-quarter sleeves itched against his skin every time he moved. And the white ribbons on them kept getting undone. And why the hell was the lacing of the corset so difficult to pull tight? Hell, weren't corsets supposed to be worn inside?
After another half hour, Shizuo finally managed to tie up all the ribbons and the corset tight enough and he stepped out of the bathroom with the darkest glare he could manage.
Erica, the weirdo, had been standing right outside the bathroom door and squealed loudly at the sight of him.
"KYAAAAAAAAAAAA~!" she went, making Shizuo's glare turn deadlier.
But it didn't affect her in the least and she stopped fangirling for a moment to inspect him closer.
Shizuo pulled at the hem of the skirt uncomfortably and growled when Erica made a loud protesting sound.
"Ne, Shizuo-san! Why aren't you wearing the choker? And your boxers! They need to go!" she said, shaking her head in disapproval.
Shizuo snarled. "The hell I'm gonna wear a fucking choker like some kind of slave. And I'm not walking around without any underwear in this skanky skirt."
Erica pouted. "No way! It was part of the punishment. You have to wear the complete outfit. So that goes for the choker and the thong!"
Shizuo, who had been fuming, paled suddenly at the mention of a thong.
"NO."
"Shizuo-saan!"
"I said NO!"
"But Shizuo-san, you lost the bet!"
"I'M NOT WEARING A FUCKING THONG."
"Shizuo-san, you have to take your punishment!"
"TO HELL WITH THE BET. NO THONGS."
"Shizuo-san, it's either that, or I call Izaya-san!"
"... You wouldn't dare..."
"Try me."
"... You're an evil person, Erica. You'll rot in hell for this."
"Oh, that's okay, I'm already heading there with all the BL I read :D. It's for a good cause!"
PS: If the anon who had requested this kink is reading this, I hope you'll enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it. :D.
