Pirates of the Playground!!! :D
'Ello! This be CaptnKat talken. Wot you are bout to read is a story written by Pirate Luvver and myself. It is our first comedy, and was thought of one crazy day at school when we were actually doing all of this (the first chapter). So, ENJOY!!! :D
Disclaimer (this lasts throughout story): We do not own POTC nor any of its characters. (sadly, I really wanted Captain Sparrow for Christmas) All other characters are ours.
Chapter 1: Pirate Playmates
The leaves on the trees were as green as the grass on the field. A warm summer breeze blows through the playground, knocking a young peaky looking kid off the swing.
"OW! ME EYE!" He cried. Another child, a chubby short boy that was already losing his hair, came over to help.
"Here, poppet. Have this old bouncy ball to replace it temporarily." Fatty said.
"Gee, thanks!"
Over near the entrance, a couple of posh looking kids walked along. The stiff looking boy, with long dark hair and a googly expression on his face, was holding a sun umbrella over the girl, who had long light hair and an expression on her face like she just had a stick shoved up her butt all the way to the roof of her mouth (which is very possible).
"Will, push me on the swings!" She commanded. Will got a dazed and glazy look over his eyes. He gave her a goofy grin.
"Sure thing, Miss Elizabeth." He replied.
A much tougher (and better) looking boy rolled in on a scooter and stopped right beside the young couple.
Looking at Will he said, "Dude, you are SO whipped."
Elizabeth gasped at his manners and at the things in his hair. Will, on the other hand, looked to the ground and blushed bright red.
Before rolling away, he looked back at them. "Bloody eunuchs."
He scooted past a bench, and rolled over a mans toes. The man threw down his newspaper.
"Wot are you doing here?!?" The boy asked. Another fat boy, with 'Gibbs' written on his shirt, poped up right behind him.
"Who's this Jack?" He asked.
"How many times do I hafta tell ye, Gibbs? It's CAPTAIN, Captain Jack Sparrow. One day I'm gonna be the leader of me own rock band!" He looks off into space.
"Right...who's this Jack?" Jack sighed dramatically.
"This is me step-father, Elron."
"Hello, kids! Lovely day today." Bellowed Elron.
"Oh sod off." Jack said. A huge dry sob came from the him.
"Why do you have to be so mean??" Elron ran off crying. Jack and Gibbs give each other a high-five and start laughing, as a faint "I'm telling your mother!" is heard in the background.
Back to the posh couple, as they walk around the boundaries of the playground.
"Awww! Look Will, a baby turtle! Isn't he cute? Oh, he is just adorable!" She pauses. "He reminds me of someone I know." Wills hopes rise.
"Who?" "ME of course!" She picks up the turtle. "See how cute we both are? Hmmm, I think I'll keep him. Yes, I'll keep him and name him Bob!"
She holds him tighter as he tries to escape her Death clutch.
"MAN OVERBOARD!!!" Is heard from the play bridge.
"Hold on Gibbsie! I'll save ye, savvy?" Jack climbed over the side and bent to pick up Gibbs.
"Jack! I'm trying to make a sand-angel, leave me alone." But Jack still tried to pick him up.
"Bleedin' hell, mate! Ye weigh a bloody ton, and yer only nine years old!"
"How would ye know?" Gibbs rolled over making a sand-devil.
"Ye said yah were four years older than me." Jack stuck out his tongue, as he noticed Elron pass by. "WHELP HO!"
"How can you be so heartless?" He blows is nose in an elvish Kleenex.
"I'm Captain Jack Sparrow, savvy?" He ran away, running right into a tree.
Over at the swings, the peaky-one-eyed kid and fatty were still talking.
"You know wot Ragetti?" Fatty said.
"What Pintel?" Raggeti said, flinging sand into his fake eye.
"When I grow up, I'm gonna work at a gas station!"
"WHOA!!!" Ragz said. "I wish I could work at a gas station!!!"
"Will!" Liz screamed. "Walk Bob and I home!"
"You're taking the turtle?? You should leave it here!" Liz gasped.
"But, but, but. I LOVE BOBSIE!!!" She cried.
"Alright, listen here. It's either ME or HIM!"
She looks down at the turtle. "I'm sorry. But, I can't live without him. I choose, Bob." Wills mouth hung open until Liz was out of sight. Jack came over and closed his mouth.
"Girls, can't live with 'em, can't live without their money." He smacked him on the back and lead him to the small rock climbing hill with a hole at the top.
Will climbed in as Jack got onto a big blue whale on a small spring. Will popped up. "BOOM BOOM!" He popped back down as Jack pretended to shoot back.
"POW POW!" "BOOM BOOM!" "POW POW POW!!!"
Jack smiles triumphantly as Will shrinks down. "boom."
SMACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A young girl slapped Jack before he even knew she was there. "Wot was that fer???"
"You stole my Barbie doll!"
"Borrowed. BORROWED without permission and with every intention of giving it back to you."
"But you didn't!"
"Actually, I did. Yer holden her right there."
"BUT HER FACE IS MELTED!!!" She held up the doll, Jack cringed.
"You'll get another one."
"A better one!" Came the echo of Wills voice.
"A better one!" Jack thought. "Of course the same thing will happen, so this is all pointless."
SSSSSSSMMMMMMMMMAAAAAACCCCCCCCKKKKKK!!!!!!!!!!
AN: Well, we hope that first chapter was good, and you liked it well enough. Further chaps are in the making, as Pirate Luvver and I are unable to get together for a while. I am sick (damned colds).
She says thanks to everyone who read and reviewed. Even if it was a flamey one.
In the mean time, as others are being written, please read (and hopefully review) our other stories.
Thanks very much!!!
CaptnKat and Pirate Luvver
)(Johnny Depp rulz)(
We love Depp
