~A short Nastu x Lucy one shot, I hope you enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own Fairy Tail or any of the characters
Summary: Natsu and Lucy decide to go out to dinner while on a mission together. What happens when the food is extra spicy and Natsu just can't take the heat?

Warnings: fluff, some possible crack, silliness :D enjoy, oh and cuss words, slight out of characterness(is that called OC? OCC? AU? I don't honestly know), and M-rated scenarios(in part 2)

Face hidden behind a glossy restaurant menu Natsu crumpled up his straw wrapper into a little ball, rolled the little piece of paper into a droplet of water on the table and loaded it into the end of his straw. Taking a pause, he had to hit his target with absolute precision, he only had one shot at this and if he were to fail the whole mission would crumble. He raised his head above the menu to give a tentative glance at the target. The object in question was currently distracted and the time to fire was upon him! Raising the straw to his lips he shot his sodden projectile with accuracy that would have made Bisca, Fairy Tail's sharp shooter, proud. Not a heartbeat later, a high pitched shriek was heard from his table partner.

Lucy Heartfilia, frowned as something wet and cold hit her in the chest and then promptly fell down her shirt to be lost between the valley of her bosom. Scowling, she unthinkingly thrust one hand down the front of her shirt to look for the offending object. Just as she was doing so she heard mischievous chuckling from behind the menu on the other end of the table.

"Natsu…" Her voice was lowered in warning, but it appeared to have opposite effect as the boy busted out in full blown laughter, tears glittering in the corners of his eyes as he desperately clutched his heaving abdomen.

"Oh... Haha! Lucy, hehe, you know it isn't very lady like to have your hand down your shirt at the dinner table~!" He wiped the tears from the corners of his eyes, but the action was proven futile as he promptly burst out into another fit of hysterical laughter at her flushed and surprised expression. She quickly pulled her hand from her shirt, in her hand she clutched the wad of sodden paper. As all the piece clicked together she suddenly turned on her rose haired companion in a furious fit. She thrust the pathetic little ball at his face and both were stunned into silence as he choked, momentarily, and then swallowed the piece of paper. She could do nothing but stare at him dumbfounded for a few seconds before she burst out in a fit of laughter, the situation was just so absurd! He too then began laughing again and that is how their server found the two of them, bent over laughing and clutching their stomachs in dear need of mercy. The man in uniform sighed and a vein throbbed in frustration, "ehem…?" He tried to politely pull them back to reality, yet the two were oblivious. "uh… EHEM!" The second attempt was just as futile as the first. Fed up with the situation he merely yelled at the two, "MAY I TAKE YOUR ODER?"

Lucy was the first one to come back from the land of laughter, wiping the tears she cleared her throat and regained her composure. "Natsu, do you know what you want?"

"eh? You mean I was supposed to decide already!"

The man stood there doing his best to look patient, "Should I come back after you've had more time to think?" He asked through a clenched jaw.

"Happy wants a mackerel, Lucy! Oh and a salmon, oh but the tuna looks good too!" He stared all glossy eyed at the pictures on the menu.

"Sorry Happy bu-"

"Do it Happy! Get all of 'em!" Yelled Natsu, he stared at the menu before him, distracted by the pictures of waffle disserts and ice cream flavors.

"Eh? But Natsu, do we have enough money for all of that?" Lucy asked doubtfully, but it was too late the waiter had already taken the order and he looked extremely pissed off that they were taking up so much of his time. The place was rather busy right now… Lucy just huffed and apologetically looked up at the waiter, "do you have any specials for tonight?"

The man listed off some typical salads, soups, and pasta dishes, each sounding delicately delicious, and just a tad bit expensive. Lucy was about ready to give up when finally the man, at the end of his patience spit out, "And we have the Flaming Dinner Special."

Natsu perked up at this, " Is there real fire in it?" He wondered if there were finally restaurants serving the abnormal tastes of the dragon slayers? How did they even know how to prepare fire dishes? An image of Totomaru dressed in chef garb flitted across his mind and he couldn't help but snicker.

"No." The waiter gave the odd boy a curious look," No, it is just the hottest dish in town, and if you can take the heat then the rest of your order is free.

That drew Lucy's attention, "a free meal." She murmured dreamily, "okay one of those please." Did I seriously just order one of those? I don't even like spicy food! Oh well… if it means we don't have to break the bank trying to pay for Happy's meal… I guess I can suffer through.

"Hey~! I didn't say that I wanted that!" Natsu protested, he knew Lucy would never eat spicy food. A girl like her couldn't possibly stomach a fiery dish.

"Stupid, I didn't order it for you, that is what I'm getting." She replied, eyes half lidded in annoyance.

"But you don't even like hot food!" He argued, " you won't be able to eat something spicy!"

"Says who? I can eat spicy food! Why are you getting all defensive about it anyway? Can you not take spicy food?" His shocked expression was answer enough for her and she sat back, arms folded across her chest and face set in a smug expression.

"Oh, I can take the heat." He grumbled. Turning towards the waiter who was looking like he was about to flip the table over in annoyance he growled, " make that two of those dishes."

"Wonderful! The food will be right out." The waiter's voice was dripping with venom and Lucy couldn't help but think he was imagining their slow deaths at the incredibly hot dishes that were going to be served to them. The man brusquely turned and left their presence like it was physically debilitating just to stand next to them.

Lucy huffed at the soured atmosphere and turned her attention back to her rambunctious partner. He was currently sitting bolt upright, fork and knife in hand and a stupidly determined look on his face.

"What are you doing?" She asked him from her slouched and unenthused position.

"I'm all fired up to show you how pathetically you are going to lose this competition!"

She groaned internally, why must he take everything as a challenge? This was supposed to be a nice dinner after a hard day at work. For once they actually came away from a well paying job without having destroyed everything in Natsu's path and she was giddy at the prospect of getting this month's rent plus a couple extra jewel that she could use to buy some new clothes… "Why are you treating this like a competition, Natsu?"

"Whats wrong Lucy? You scared? You know you can't win a Spicy Food eating competition against the Fire Dragon Slayer?" His words were punctuated by little puffs of smoke for emphasis. His over cocky mood was beginning to piss her off. So she can't eat spicy food? Oh She'd show Mr. Fire Dragon Slayer, 'scuse her, 'The Fire Dragon Slayer'. She leaned forward and folded her hands under her chin staring angrily into his eyes. He grinned cockily chin thrust upwards in the air so he had to look down at her through heavily lidded eyes. She would, barely, admit that he did look rather sexy this way. Cocky confident Natsu, though he was infuriatingly so, was a lot cooler that dorky "Ninja Natsu". She smiled a little at the memory and raised an eye brow at his challenge, feeling rather confident in her own abilities.

"We will see, Mr. Dragoneel, who can take the heat, we shall see."

Oblivious to the heated looks battling above him, Happy sat in a puddle of anticipating goo on the table. He was practically soaked in his own drool as he thought about the glorious feast of tasty fish he was going to get to eat. He could smell their succulent scent wafting dreamily in from the kitchen. His pupils had dilated to fish shapes and he was on his back in heaven. Soon, he would have them. Soooon~

Natsu stared into Lucy's heated brown eyes. He had never seen a competitive look in Lucy before. He rather liked her smoldering look, like she might have some fire in her soul after all. It ignited his own feelings and he found himself anticipating for more than just this food competition. But what exactly was he looking for? He didn't understand this urge in him, so he just brushed it aside and focused on how easy this competition would be for him. After all, he was a fire eater. What was a little spicy food in the mouth of a man who could down a cup of magma (if he wanted to, he tried that once and it left him feeling sluggish and tired for days, seeing as it wasn't really fire, plus it tasted terrible, but it did feel cool to swallow…)?

But back to Lucy and the new found fire in her eyes. Well, it wasn't quite at the point of fire yet, just… smoldering, like banked coals. He wondered if anything could really get those chocolate orbs to actually blaze. He wanted to see the Stellar Spirit Mage's eyes sparkle, see light burst forth from them like the fiery infernos that was the deaths of the very stars she called upon. He wanted to be the cause of that flame...

The thought of him igniting a fire in her made him feel funny and suddenly his confidence wavered and waned; he scowled, confused by his own thoughts. She raised a perfectly shaped questioning brow at him and he shrugged it off, deftly grabbing a packet of sugar from the side of the table and playing with it.

His toying with the stupid packet of sugar was starting to annoy her. It could just be an after effect of her curiosity, which he had so casually brushed off. Why had his expression changed before? Natsu was a rather simple guy, usually, so she didn't like not knowing what he was thinking. It felt odd, weird. Giving a mysteriousness to him that wasn't typical Natsu. Mysterious was bad… it made him interesting and she definitely did not want to be interested in her fighting partner. After all, Natsu was her friend. Last time she checked friends weren't really interested in each other, not in that way atleast…

Her rambling thoughts were abruptly stopped as the waiter returned with their food.

Presented before the Dragon Slayer and the Stellar Mage were two heaping plates of Hellish origin, Lucy was sure. Just sitting near the plate was making her eyes burn and tear. Everything on the plate was within the same spectrum of color as Erza's hair. Gleaming and glittering bubbles popped on the surface of some kind of sauce, Lucy held her breath, cautious of it being noxious gases. Was it just her imagination or did the yellowish tinted grease like juice look sulfurous in nature…? She gave a furtive glance at how Natsu was faring.

The Salamander, blissfully ignorant as he was, lifted his fork and drove it into the smoldering concoction. He lifted what may have been some sort of ghostly white pepper, but was now dripping with acidic juices, marring and dissolving the skin turning it a sickening array of colors where it eroded as well as simultaneously preserved itself. She could do nothing but stare at him as he curled his tongue around the fork and drew the food(if you could call it that) into his mouth.

She waited for his reaction.

And waited….

A bubble popped in the sauce of her food, she mindlessly stirred the meal, not able to discern what anything on the plate was. Growing up, her father had really enjoyed Korean food, so she was rather used to spicy dishes, perhaps that was why she avoided them now? But this… this looked like nothing she had ever witnessed before. Curious, she poked at her own pearly white pepper and lifted it. The vegetable glittered maliciously on the end of her fork, as if daring her to even try to take a bite. Again she noticed the incandescent swirling colors and eerily was reminded of a story of never ending damnation to sinners of the world…the souls had to suffer through eternal reincarnation just to suffer the 7 layers of Hell, over and over. She shivered, somehow this pepper's preservation and yet dissolving state reminded her of the tales of that inferno… She glanced up at Natsu, worried that he had yet to make a sound, but the table was empty. Looking around she realized that, except for Happy(who was currently in a state of pure ecstasy) no one else was in the room. She shrugged and popped the pepper into her mouth….

Natsu was successful in remaining absolutely still as Lucy stared at him inquisitively. Whether, it was caused by his sheer force of will power, or his body ceasing up from shock, or some supernatural power, he couldn't say. All that was left of his recognition was the second Lucy had glanced down at her plate he had collapsed on to the floor, body practically ruptured by spasms, he felt as if searing white blades of near molten metal were slowly stabbing into the back of his tender throat. His lungs were burning and felt like they were collapsed or filled with ice, he wasn't sure if they were so hot they were cold, or so cold they were hot, but he knew that with each breath came an agonizing tearing feeling, as if each little alveoli of his lungs were being cut through, like the shower curtains of helpless, naked teenage girls in cheesy horror movies. His brain had been liquefied in his skull, and wasn't even acknowledging how weird of a simile he had tried to use a second ago… with one last final tremor his body lay completely still for a moment. Happy too far gone into the world of fish to save him, and Lucy was staring at the fucking ghost pepper like it was going to come alive and tell her the secrets of the god damned universe, meanwhile he was just DYING ON THE FUCKING FLOOR, oh, don't mind me you stupid blond bitch, I've only saved your ass a couple times, from terrible monsters and shit. Don't bother getting me a glass of water while I die of heat poisoning or some stupid bull fucking shit like that! "Ugh…" He groaned. Realizing that if he could cuss that vividly in his head his body must be adjusting to the heat. Gingerly lifting his body from the floor he realized his hair was stuck to his face with sweat and his body gleamed slightly from more sweat. His muscles ached and protested wearily as he pushed himself into sitting position. I may never think anything like this again, but I… I think that this goes for a worse experience than any travel I have ever had to do before.

He managed to lift a heavy hand to the edge of the table, dragging himself up on to his chair he panted heavily and maneuvered into a sitting position. His head fell back, breath coming in ragged gasps, rasping past his raw throat he winced as he looked forward at Lucy and gasped.

Lucy watched Natsu drag himself up from the floor. The sight was rather erotic, if she did say so. The thick tendons of his arms stretched and pulled coupled with his sinewy muscles. The way his tanned skin glittered with the sheen of sweat in the dusky light of the room, enhancing the stimulating ripple of muscles. His strong hand gripping the edge of the table in a way that seemed caught between desperation and brute determination. And finally, he reached his goal and sat in the chair with his head back, exposing the column of his neck. Lucy had a thing for necks. Especially Natsu's since it was rarely ever exposed, usually secured beneath his scarf. But now it lay bared before her, she watched his adams apple bob sensuously as he swallowed, more tendons pulled and strained and she got a teasing glimpse of his pulse point before he pulled his head forward and caught her eyes. His gasp drew her attention to his mouth, his thin lips looked chapped, and yet so…perfect.

Whaaaaaat! Natsu couldn't think. Nope, absolutely not. His brain was fried, completely fried, that was the only thing that could make this scene make sense. Lucy sat across the table from him, slowly eating everything on her plate. NO LIE. NO FUCKING LIE, suddenly, Erza didn't seem like the scariest person in the guild anymore. As he slowly became more aware, he realized how much more absurd everything was becoming. Not only was Lucy finishing everything on her plate, but she was staring at him with half lidded eyes. The milk chocolate brown orbs had darkened seductively, looking more like silky molten dark chocolate, and they were devouring him. He felt his pulse and heart beat quicken as she finally finished her plate. Her bright pink tongue peaked out and took the heat from her lips, they had been left slightly swollen and redder than normal, and now they looked like candy, glossy. He shivered under her gaze, it raked over his body, he was only wearing what he always wore on their jobs, his shirt open and exposing the lean muscles of his abdomen, he felt his muscles twitch slightly, and he felt nervous and self-conscious under her gaze. She blinked slowly and raked her eyes up his chest and neck, pausing at his neck for a few heart beats until zeroing in on his lips.

Did he mention his brain was fried? Yeah…

As if her looking at him, no, as if her feasting upon him with her eyes weren't crazy enough, next thing he knows, Lucy is slowly raising herself up on her chair and crawling, fucking crawling across the table towards him. He can hear his heart beat in his ears, but it seems muted and far away. Everything seems muted and far away, everything….except her. Her supple, curvaceous form crawling on hands and knees across the table to him. In reality, the table was probably barely long enough to have to actually crawl, but in his mind it took an arduously long amount of time for her to reach him. And when she finally did, all he could do was stare at her.

At some point her hair had come loose and now the long honey-blond strands cascaded around her face, and down her shoulders. It looked like liquid gold. He reached out a dazed hand to grab at it. Silky strands sliding through his fingers like ethereal star dust. He felt like this was all a dream, a damn good one too. He slowly smiled, a half grin that blazed with something other than cocky confidence and bull headed determination.

Her heart stuttered at the radiant smile that slowly spread across his face. She looked up at him through her thick lashes, eyes becoming innocent and doe like, yet needy. She was asking him for something… Now if only he wasn't too dense to find out?

-To be continued :U Tomorrow~! I promise! Now… I must sleep e_e thank you for reading! 3-