Warnings: Explicit sexual content, mature suicide content.

Disclaimer: The OC is me, everyone else not mine. I don't get any money for this.

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I'm falling, ...

That's the way I always imagined it to be like - endless downfall in peace, that's the way the death should be like.

Closing my eyes I enjoy the wind, the silence. Don't even bothering if I hit something down on the ground, just hoping it will be a bottomless abyss to fall into.

A wish crosses my mind - Kakashi ... Narutos world - this one would be heaven, ... but I don't deserve it, I'm perfectly aware of it. Not with my malice to the whole existence in my heart and mind.

Jumping, that's always been the way I wanted to end this meaningless life, I got old enough, I tried everything out. But I broke my promise, the promise to my mum to stay alive and get some happiness out of it. There is no happiness in this world for me, no guy who could give me the heartache like the unreal, the created ones.
They kisses and touches never got the heartbeat out of me, which fanfictions could cause with ease. I never wanted this housewife typical life, to clean the house, to have a fence with a dog or kids, nothing I ever desired. There is simply nothing this whole world could even offering me. I didn't feel the crash on the ground, the splattering of my brain and limbs, it was so fast my brain couldn't even register the end. I didn't even expect it to hurt at all. I'm glad I did it at the end - enough suffering, enough for thousand life times.

A single teardrop, falls from my eye, while I stretch my body to enjoy the ride. The teardrop unseen by anything or anyone, falls into the darkness of the nothingness.

Silence.

The long hair flattering in the wind from the fall. The body not moving, just falling down and down, further and further without a ground.

Just a single sunray crosses the fragile drop from the inside, lightens it out - to overwhelm the darkness surrounding it.

Light? Why disturbing my peace? I'm absolutely fine with nothingness. Still I force my eyes open to assure my surroundings - expecting the black bottomless, awaiting not to be able seeing anything at all - just to discover that I'm falling in giant speed trough the sky, the earth coming fast against me.

Holy shit, ...

Before I knew it, the sound escapes my lungs, crying out, maybe out of surprise and shock, maybe scared that I will hurt myself, even if it's ridiculous.

"NOOOOOOO! NOT THIS AGAIN! WHY?"

I close my eyes just to prepare to feel pain. WAMM! Something soft and warm assails me, the breath I held behind, strikes my lungs with the raised dust. It surrounds everything arround the place I've fallen into, so there is nothing for me to see but the gray grains floating in the air. Coughing, I just force out of me...

"Fuck this, fuck everything."

I just catch a glimpse of silver hair under me, before it gets dark again.