Disclaimer- Rogue is Marvel's. I don't own her.
Summary- This is a very depressing letter Rogue wrote to her mother after she ran away, but before the X-men find her.
Momma,
I'm sorry, Momma. I am. I wish I could take everything back. Every single, hateful word. You know you will never get to read this because I will never send it to you. And giving it to you in person is out of the question. No, I am telling this to you for no reason. Why am I such an idiot? Why can't I ever do anything right!?
That's why I left. You know that, too. You always knew what I was thinking and why. I could never lie to you, even when I was lying to myself. Talking to you always made me feel better when I was upset. I miss you so much, more than anything else.
You would take me into your arms and hug me close and whisper that I could cry on your shoulder. I would tell you my fears and hopes and why I was angry. Then you would help me make the decision to go apologize or keep working to get what I wanted.
You can't do that anymore.
Nobody can do that anymore.
I hate myself right now. I despise the piece of trash that ran away instead of facing her problems. I want to destroy the idiot that left her family, thinking that they couldn't understand, instead of staying and helping them to. I want to make the fool that left suffer dying a thousand times.
I can't. I can't kill myself. I don't have enough self-control.
Isn't it pitiful that even though I am not worth the dust on the ground I still want to live, Momma? Shouldn't I move over and let another take my space. Maybe he could do more good than I have or will. I can't, Momma.
Don't think that I haven't tried. Slit wrists, hanging, overdosing on medication. Somehow I am still here, still alive. It makes me loath me worse.
Momma, I'm sorry for not being a good daughter to you. I know that you had such dreams for me. I had dreams for me too. None will ever be reached.
Please, forgive me. I love you, but I can never return. Good-bye, Momma. And, remember, I'm sorry.
Summary- This is a very depressing letter Rogue wrote to her mother after she ran away, but before the X-men find her.
Momma,
I'm sorry, Momma. I am. I wish I could take everything back. Every single, hateful word. You know you will never get to read this because I will never send it to you. And giving it to you in person is out of the question. No, I am telling this to you for no reason. Why am I such an idiot? Why can't I ever do anything right!?
That's why I left. You know that, too. You always knew what I was thinking and why. I could never lie to you, even when I was lying to myself. Talking to you always made me feel better when I was upset. I miss you so much, more than anything else.
You would take me into your arms and hug me close and whisper that I could cry on your shoulder. I would tell you my fears and hopes and why I was angry. Then you would help me make the decision to go apologize or keep working to get what I wanted.
You can't do that anymore.
Nobody can do that anymore.
I hate myself right now. I despise the piece of trash that ran away instead of facing her problems. I want to destroy the idiot that left her family, thinking that they couldn't understand, instead of staying and helping them to. I want to make the fool that left suffer dying a thousand times.
I can't. I can't kill myself. I don't have enough self-control.
Isn't it pitiful that even though I am not worth the dust on the ground I still want to live, Momma? Shouldn't I move over and let another take my space. Maybe he could do more good than I have or will. I can't, Momma.
Don't think that I haven't tried. Slit wrists, hanging, overdosing on medication. Somehow I am still here, still alive. It makes me loath me worse.
Momma, I'm sorry for not being a good daughter to you. I know that you had such dreams for me. I had dreams for me too. None will ever be reached.
Please, forgive me. I love you, but I can never return. Good-bye, Momma. And, remember, I'm sorry.
