What Hurts The Most
Song written by Jeffrey Steele and Steve Robson (Yes, songs aren't always written by the artist. Who'd have known)
Sung by Rascal Flatts (or Cascada)
I don't own anything, unfortunately.
I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don't bother me
I hear the melancholy pitter-patter of the rain as it hits the roof. It's pouring again, for the second time today. I get up off the floor where I've been laying and stare out my bedroom window. Outside, I can see the wind pummeling the trees outside. It's the middle of the afternoon, but it's been nothing but clouds all day. Though I'm in the warmth of my bedroom, I feel as if I'm outside, huddled in the unforgiving rain. But If I'm inside, than why am I feeling the icy cold drops on my skin? Without warning, I burst into tears.
I can take a few tears now and then and just let 'em out
That don't bother me
I drop onto my knees, sobbing uncontrollably. I'm glad not many people are around the Hyuuga household today. I imagine what father would say if he saw me like this. When I was little he would slap me if I cried. "Toughen up, Hinata," he would say. If Neji had seen that, back in the day, he would have smirked, uncaring. I wonder what Neji would do nowadays. Probably stand there, not sure what to do. Maybe father would ignore me too, leaving me to my misery. I wouldn't care either way.
I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
I curl up in a little ball on the ground. It's been almost two months since Kiba disappeared on a mission. Maybe if I'd been there He would be sitting here with me, complaining about the rain or how annoying Shino has been lately. Images of him bounce around in my head, making me cry harder. I drag my fingernails down the bare skin of my arm. Pain races up my arm satisfyingly. I'm alive.
There are days every now and again I pretend I'm okay
But that's not what gets me
I imagine him sliding his sharp fingernails over my body. It comforts me. He was never the gentle type; there were several times I ended up with scratches on my body. Sometimes he would apologize. Most of the time he just pretended nothing ever happened. Just another fuck. I never told him I loved him. I wonder if he cared about me at all.
What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
Never knowing
What could have been
He was always so cocky. Getting into fights every which way. Whenever someone picked on me, it seemed like he didn't even notice. He never got into a fight involving me. We were friends, but sometimes I felt like he only wanted me on the team as a tool. Nothing more. But then… I don't quite know how it happened. Everything fell into its own fucked up place. I was was always left wallowing in the muck of my own guilt. If father found out he would be angry, and someone was bound to notice the scratches on my body. I feared sooner or later they would find out. Father would hit me. He'd brand me as a whore. And you know what? He wouldn't be too far off the mark.
Not seeing by loving you
Is what I was trying to do
And now he's missing and I'm left like this, pathetically sobbing on the floor. I've been sick and depressed ever since he left. I get dizzy sometimes, and I've passed out once. I've also been throwing up a lot. He's even made me overeat and now I'm getting fat. Everything about my body is out-of-whack. It's all his fault. Without even doing anything, he ripped me to pieces. I wonder if I hate him for what he's done to me.
I'm not sure where this idea came from… (Honestly, it creeps me out a little) But the plot bunny hit when I was supposed to be writing an essay. Sometimes I question what goes on in my mind…
Anyway, this is the first story I've put up here, so constructive criticism would be appreciated. (I know Hinata was a bit OOC. Blame it on the plot bunny.) No flames (this includes rude comments about the song) or my evil twin sister will eat your brains. (Yes, I have a twin sister. I'm just that awesome.)
I'm seriously considering making this into a longer story, so please leave a review giving your advice. Just press the button… if you don't, my twin sister is still hungry… :D
Seriously, if you review I will refrain from all bad jokes in the future. Okay?
