Auf Achse

Jace had finished his shower awhile ago, but it did nothing to clear his head of a specific redhead, as he had pitifully hoped. He contented himself in sitting in the armchair and watching Clary sleep. He really had nothing else to do…. Or at least that was his excuse. Sitting there, a song he had heard on the radio popped into his head. He was just flipping through channels when he passed an indie station, one he never really listened to. But the lyrics of the song playing had hit home.

You see her, you can't touch her

You hear her, you can't hold her

You want her, you can't have her

You want to, but she won't let you.

This was the issue. Clary. Valentine. Sister. All names and titles he couldn't for the life of him get out of his head. Specifically his and Clary's short lived make-out session the day of her birthday, and even more recently, the Seelie queens request. Even thinking about it now, it brought shivers of pleasure raking through his body.

No. His inner self commanded. You're her brother. Her brother. You can't think that way.

You see her, you can't touch her

You hear her, you can't hold her

You want her, you can't have her

You want to, but she won't let you.

But no matter what he couldn't stop loving her the way he did. Proven by the way he more-than-obviously nearly crushed her with all his pent up emotion when finally he could kiss her again in the Seelie Court. … Probably wasn't so pleasant for Clary though, since she was apperantly 'disgusted' by his love for her.

She's not so special so look what you've done, boy

She's not so special so look what you've done, boy

She's not so special so look what you've done

Now you wish she'd never come back here again

Oh, never come back here again

Not necessairily true. He wanted her to stay, to stay here forever. …. Or did he? Who wants to have to pretend to be okay, even when your heart is constantly breaking. Spending time with a person you can't stop loving, even when the people around you are probably gagging on their disgust.

Now I'm nailed above you

Gushing from my side

I looked at her. Really looked at her, hoping beyond hope my next words would somehow reach her conscious: I love you Clary.

It's with your sins that you have killed me

Thinking of your sins I die

I'm dying from my love for you. It's almost too much…

Thinking how you'd let them touch you

Does it really matter what the others think? Is that really what you care most about?

How you'd never realise

That I'm ripped and hang forsaken

Knowing never will I rise

Again

Do you care about them more then us?

Clary started to drool on my shirt.

A brother's reaction: Get the hell off my shirt!

My undeniable reaction: I wish I could occupy your mouth with something else…

Clary gasped, suddenly waking up, as if from some dreadful nightmare. He reached out taking in the piece of portal, making it look as if that's what he had been occupying his time with. Maybe she hadn't seen me yet. My prayers were answered as her eyes searched before locking on to my own.

Those painfully beautiful emerald eyes…

You still see her

Oh, you hear her

You want her

Oh, you want to

You see her

You hear her

You want her

You still want to