A/N: Hi guys, I'd like to present to all of you my newest Lucket project, Love and Equations. The plot bunnies are turning into evil little fur balls that I can't even stop them from bugging me through the holiday. Therefore, I decided to publish this new storyline to put my mind at peace.
The idea is to make this as a collection of oneshots based on prompts that I choose from various types of genres in fanfiction. I will put some infos on every story to show what genres I used as a prompt and a brief explanation of what the story is about. The plot will be mostly revolves around the main title. It acts as a challenge for me to express the meaning of the title with different combination of genres that I can think of. And one more thing, this is just a little side project of mine for Lucket so the updates won't be very frequent as I'm still continuing Backfired and The Enigma. It will only be updated whenever the plot bunny attacks.
So, there you go, a little introduction of this new addition to the Lucket community. I know the fandom is getting smaller and smaller each day, but I will never give up on writing for Lucket because I love them so much it hurts sometimes.
To all Lucket readers out there, hope you guys will enjoy this and as usual, reviews, faves, and alerts are very much appreciated. Thank you so much and happy reading! :D
underdogwriter2410
Disclaimer: I do not own Terra Nova and the characters. No copyright infringement intended.
LOVE AND EQUATIONS
-I-
Ashes to Ashes
Genre/s: Angst/Hurt/Comfort
Song: Both of Us (B.o.B feat. Taylor Swift)
Summary: She could feel his presence around her, grazing her skin with the fiery passion embedded in his eyes. If only she could turn back the time, to justify her actions in the past. But she knew her time was up, leaving her with nothing but the empty desire, for the one she despised, and yearned the most...
Guilt - a treacherous burden that would forever be on her shoulders every time she remembered that day.
2 years – 2 years of unyielding pain that she had to bear from the decision she made. She knew it was wrong to feel this way. The unbearable torment and desire that were tied delicately in a fragile ribbon, waiting to be torn into pieces if she let her guards down.
She had no other choice. 2 shots were enough to plunge her into the infinite depth of darkness. If only she hadn't met him, hadn't tasted the sweetness of his lips against hers, she would easily stand on the other side of the line, watching as his dreams and ambitions burned into ashes before her. It was the right thing to do, the only way to save the ones she loved and to prove that she still had the rights to call the only paradise on earth her home. But she couldn't deny the gnawing pain inside her, as she turned her back on him and walked away.
She never saw him ever since. As the colony moved towards the utopia that she once dreamed of, she began to drift away from the light and entered the little world of misery called hell. She felt empty, and lost. It was as if a part of her had been buried along the reaped soul of the one she despised the most, the one that made her tossed and turned every night, the one that held the answer to her questions, and yet she didn't have the power to turn everything back to the way it used to be.
She didn't know how to react, how to act, how to feel. It was all seemed so sudden and irrational. She cursed herself for letting him tore the walls of pretension that she had built around her. If only she didn't let him touch her that night, if only she didn't feel his rough fingertips brushed against her cheek with the unspoken passion that was visible in his jade-green eyes. She could only hope it had never happened, and yet she knew that she was just fooling herself with the ludicrous thoughts in her mind, hoping that she might put her feet towards a new direction, opening a new page in her life without giving herself a chance to take a second glance to the things she left behind.
As she stared at the darkened sky above her, she whispered a silent goodbye to him, hoping that somehow her regret might put his soul in peace. She could feel the wind caressed her cheeks lightly, leaving her breathless as her mind started to drift away, letting it swayed with the rustling sound of leaves around her. Her feet touched the damp rocks beneath her, feeling the rush of water prickling through her skin, reviving her in the inside. For a moment she was lost in her own world, letting her guards down as if she owned the time and place in the palm of her hands.
It was the only place that she could feel safe, far from the constriction of the gates and the perfect little community that always waited for her with open arms. She felt grateful to be surrounded by the ones who loved her, who had never passed any judgments towards her dark and weary past, but still she felt incomplete.
Their arms would only provide temporary warmth that could never be filled thoroughly even though she tried to convince herself that this life was all she had ever wanted since she stepped out of the portal. The sense of belonging, the love, and the acceptance. She should be happy and content with her situation, and yet there she was, sitting among the rocks filled with various symbols and equations, a palpable sign of his presence that only she could feel its power flowed through her entire body. It was part of her insanity, and yet she didn't care if it was wrong or right anymore. As long as she could taste that blissful moment again and again, she would take it no matter how crazy it might seem.
She could feel a warm body towering above her, blocking the fading light through her thin eyelids. She forced a smile, realizing it must be her company that would tell her when the time was up. Even though as the years passed there was no more restriction to wander outside the gates since the Sixers had offered a flag of truce, there were still some rules that had to be followed and justification would be applied for those who dared to breach them. But at that moment she couldn't care less with all the written rules and boundaries, all she wanted just a small prick of a moment where she could stay there forever.
"Can we just stay for another 5 minutes?" she murmured lazily, didn't care to open her eyes as she felt the figure leaned closer to her, closer than she expected until she creased her eyebrows in confusion. She could feel the texture of rough fingers against her skin, reviving the parched desire she felt in the inside. "Josh?" she whispered warily, cringing to her position as the warm breath grazing through her soft skin. And before she could react to the situation, her lips were sealed with familiar warmth, the warmth that she had longed for since she tasted it for the first time 2 years ago.
Her hands moved to grab the dream in front of her, afraid that she might lose it if she didn't hold it in her grasp. As she opened her eyes, staring into the set of jade-green eyes that were filled with unspoken truth and pain, her walls crumbled to ashes, leaving her with the fragility of her broken soul.
"Lucas.." her breathy whisper filled the emptiness around them, adding the heaviness in the thin air, making her hard to breathe. The condemnation in his eyes told her a whole different story, despite his tender gesture towards her. His hand moved to take hers, gently shoving the cold metal into her palm and closed her fingers gingerly around the handle. Her pupils dilated with fear as realization dawned on her, and she let a single shed of tear fell through her cheek. "No.." she shook her head weakly, tears overflowing from her blue eyes. He stared at her with stoicism, showing no fear, no regrets. "Finish what you've started, Bucket. It's time." He whispered tenderly to her, wiping her tears with his fingers. "No.." she replied to him as the memories flooded back through her mind, shuddering her to the core. If only she could turn back the time, to justify her actions in the past. But she knew her time was up, leaving her with nothing but the empty desire, for the one she despised, and yearned the most.
She knew what he wanted, to finish whatever she had left off on that treacherous day. Her hands had spilled the blood of the one who needed redemption, the son of the mighty Commander that was lost in the pain of his dark past. She was the murderer. The coldblooded one who had pulled the trigger for the sake of the one she loved. She had killed herself, killed the part of her even when she knew that she would never be the same again.
If only it had never happened, she would be free from this guilt, this burden, this pain. She couldn't do it. The ache in her heart told her to run away, to shut herself from the whole world and dwelled in the misery she had built upon her. But she knew that was not what she wanted. As crazy as it might seem, she preferred to stay in this prick of a moment where she could feel as if she had found her own paradise. There was nothing she wanted more than to freeze the slight glimpse of contentment and peace. And she would take the consequences in order to hold this moment in her hands as nothing else mattered to her anymore. There was only her, and him.
His hand wrapped around hers and slowly he lifted the tip towards the spot where he would gain the sense of peace he had wanted since the first two bullets nestled on his chest. The only thing he needed was for her to pull the trigger and everything would fall into the right place. He had lived for the past 2 years in an endless circle of emptiness and pain. His life was only a worthless thing in this weary world, and he didn't intend to prolong that situation. His time had come to an end and he knew this was the only way for him to finally get what he wanted.
"Please, Bucket." He pleaded, pressing the tip further into his chest. "Do it as a favor. For me." He closed his eyes, unable to handle any more pain that was written all over her beautiful face. If only she didn't give him that look in her eyes, everything would be flowing as he had planned. If only she didn't hold his face in her hand, he would take that gun from her and shoot himself mercilessly. But her passion, her desire, her need, they had fuelled him with a new revelation in his mind, making him realized that there was something more than this dark charade that had haunted him for as long as he could remember. The pretension was thick in the air, concealing the real desire that was visible enough for both of them to see, and yet they didn't want to let their guards down, holding to one another until one of them gave it away.
"Do it." He demanded, wrapping his finger on the trigger, convincing her that it was the right thing to do, the only way to end their wicked game of doom. Tears flowed swiftly from her eyes as she suddenly pulled her hand from his, aiming the tip straightly to her chest. "I'll do it. Not with your way, but with my way." His jade eyes burned with anger and fear as she settled her fragile finger on the trigger, ready to pull it whenever she wanted. She couldn't live another day knowing that he was still alive with the pain and defeat on his side. The redemption would be justified upon him if she willing to sacrifice herself, for the one she cared the most, for the one she loved. A part of her had died, and the last thing she had to do was to kill the other part to finish the one she had started that day, to take back the burden and hate that she had laid upon his shoulders.
She was about to pull the trigger when he suddenly grabbed her face in his hands and pressed his lips roughly against hers. She responded by grabbing his worn out shirt in her fists, letting the gun fell sharply to the rocks beneath them. For a moment they lost in each other's embrace, crumbling the walls of pretension around them and let the emotions took control of their minds. As they broke away, realization dawned on them that there was nothing else they wanted more than to be able to fuel each other with the same passion and desire, the same thing they had done 2 years ago.
The desire burned his skin as he felt her fingertips touched the side of his face and caressed it lightly until he had to close his eyes, unable to register the blissful moment in his scattered mind. The pain and the hate faded to the thin air as he placed a soft kiss on her lips, sealing everything he had promised her. The guilt suddenly crept through his veins, realizing how he had lost the opportunity for so long, even though it had always been there, just within an arm's reach. He had fooled himself with the anger and thirst of revenge, but now he could see that his answer was in her all along.
"I'm sorry." She whispered to him and he answered it with a long lingering kiss, showing the burning passion he had for her since the first time he met her at the Sixers camp. She sighed into his kiss and broke away, leaning her forehead against his as she opened her eyes.
The set of jade eyes that was once malicious and full of hate, now filled with love and compassion. She felt content and complete, and for once in her weary life, she found hope, the only thing that she had never seen it in anyone but him.
As he stared into her deep blue eyes, he found something he had never dared to put it into words. The answer was too tangible to be ignored, and for once in his tormented life, he found hope, the only thing that he had never seen it in anyone else but her.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Everything had its own beginning, and its ending. As they stared to the darkened sky above them, they knew, the ending was only the beginning. Just like a full circle. It would never end.
Thank you so much for reading! I really appreciate it. :)
