I couldn't help myself. This popped into my head and I had to write it. I've been told to keep it short becasue I have a tendency to drag things on and on, I'm sure this won't be more than five chapters even if they are freakishly long chapters. Plus I still have to finish Wonderful World which had been going on for I'm guessing about a year so anyway.

I don't own them. If I did...well this would probably happen.

Special Thanks to wonderousplaceforanecho. Without her this wouldn't have an many details and things would be spelled wrong or more wrong. Anyway thank you chica.


Marissa walked in the door, miserable from another day at school and another day of life in general. She slammed the front door as per usual and started to quietly ascend the stairs.

As she got closer to the top of the stairs she heard a large commotion in the direction of her room. When she got closer, she saw the door to her room wide open and there were clothes strewn all over the place. She ran the rest of the way to her room and saw her mother rifling through her closet. There were clothes all over the ground and four bottles of vodka on the bed in various stages of fullness and three small orange vials next to them.

Marissa was suddenly sick. She'd been caught and she knew there was more to find in the closet. Her instinct was to go on the offensive and she went with it.

"What are you doing in my room?!" Marissa yelled.

Julie immediately emerged from the closet with a bottle of tequila in one hand and two more orange vials. "I'm finding out my daughter in a drunk and a junkie."

Marissa didn't have an answer to that so she remained quiet.

"When did this start, Marissa?" Julie demanded.

"Fuck off," Marissa muttered and rolled her eyes. Pretending not to care was usually her defense and it seemed to be working now.

"Excuse me?" Julie was taken aback. She tossed the drugs and tequila onto the bed, "You will not speak to me like that. I am your mother."

"You've never been a mother to me," Marissa took a step closer to her mother as if daring her to fight.

"Then I won't treat you like a daughter," Julie set her jaw and put her hands on her hips, "Get out of my house."

"What?" Marissa asked in disbelief. She felt like someone just punched her.

"Get out," Julie answered, "Rehab didn't work. Discipline didn't work. Trying to be your friend didn't work. I've exhausted my resources trying to deal with you. You have ten minutes to pack your things and leave before I send the help to escort you out. You can keep your car, but I'm canceling your credit cards tomorrow." Julie grabbed all the orange vials off the bed. "Goodbye." With that Julie Cooper walked out of her daughter's room.

Marissa would have fallen down in sobs had her body not taken over and started packing. She stuffed as much clothes and shoes she could into her many suitcases as she could and hoped they would all fit in her car.

Then she went to her closet and grabbed a few scrapbooks. It was her and Summer's secret best friend hobby since sixth grade. They still continued the tradition when they were feeling nostalgic or just needed somewhere to put a bunch of pictured. She would have smiled at the one Summer made her had circumstanced been better. She tossed her 'BBF Scrapbook featuring Summer into the only suitcase left open. What was meant to be DJ's scrapbook ended up being just a few pictures in an envelope. The next one was her Ryan book. She could barely look at it without seeing Trey's face so she angrily threw it back into the closet. The only one left was Alex.

Marissa took a second to study Alex's smiling face. A tear fell from Marissa's cheek onto one of Alex's dazzling blue eyes.

Heavy footsteps up the stairs brought her out of her revelry. She put Alex's smiling face next to Summer's and tried to close the suitcase. There was no way Marissa could close it. She blindly grabbed one of the scrapbooks and tossed it onto the bed. She was able to barely close the suitcase before the gardener was at the door.

"Missus Cooper wants me to help you with your bags," he simply stated. His broad shoulders nearly filling up the doorway.

Marissa nodded and barely got out, "Thanks."

She put the most full bottle of vodka in her oversized purse along with the stray scrapbook. The gardener already had the majority of Marissa's suitcases packed under his muscular arms. Marissa grabbed her small suitcase and her purse then followed him out to her car.

Marissa paused at the front door. "Bye mom!" she called, sarcasm dripping off the last word.

It was getting dark outside when they finished loading Marissa's car. The gardener the trunk of her car and nodded to her.

She force a small smile, "Thanks."

He nodded again and walked to the side of the house where he disappeared.

Marissa got into her car and immediately drove off. It wasn't until she got to the beach that she realized she didn't really have anywhere to go. Summer and her family were in Spain or Switzerland or something like that so she couldn't stay there. She definitely couldn't stand to stay at the Cohen's. She couldn't even look at a picture of Ryan, much less the real thing.

Marissa dug in her purse and pulled out her phone. She quickly scanned her contacts and pressed send. She rested her head on the steering wheel and closed her eyes, listening to the dull sound telling her that her phone was trying to connect. It finally picked up, "Hey." She brightened for a moment before she heard more speaking. "You've reached Jimmy Cooper…" Marissa angrily shut her phone and muttered sarcastically to herself, "Just like dad to be there when I need him."

Marissa looked out at the beach thought of everyone else she knew. Most of them she couldn't stand. The rest couldn't stand her. She didn't know where to go.

She turned her purse over to dump out the contents, and grabbed the bottle of vodka. She quickly unscrewed the lid and dropped it in her cup holder. After taking a long drink of the clear liquid she leaned her head back on the seat and tears started to cascade down her face.

Her tears started to die down fifteen minutes later as she stared out at the ocean. She saw the tide begin to swell and sighed deeply. She was completely exhausted from this completely emotionally arduous day.

Marissa got out of her car and trudged onto the beach with the vodka in hand. After she plopped down a few feet from the water, she stared blankly at the bottle in her hand. This is what got me in trouble in the first place. She figured it didn't matter anymore. She didn't have anything to loose. She used to have her mom, but now, obviously she didn't. Summer's out of the country. Her dad was nowhere to be found. She couldn't stand seeing Ryan anymore, not that they were still on good terms anyway. Without her parent, Summer and Ryan, she had nothing. She was alone and at that moment she felt it. It hit her like a brick wall. She was alone. She didn't have anyone to talk to. No one to give her a hug. The word 'alone' echoed in her mind until she thought she'd go insane if she heard it again.

The salty air swirled around her and she closed her eyes trying to loose herself in the wind. To blow away and be somewhere else. Be someone else. Being Marissa Cooper wasn't working out so well for her.

Deciding it was time to really find somewhere to stay, Marissa walked back to her car, sunk into the seat, and grabbed the lid of the bottle and screwed it back on. As she placed the bottle in the passenger's seat, her eyes caught the scrap book that had been dumped out along with the contents of her purse.

It may be a terrible idea, but Marissa didn't really have any other options. Marissa slowly opened the book and saw a picture of both of them in bed, Alex smiling and Marissa kissing her cheek.

On the opposite page was a picture of a stick man surfing, drawn on a napkin. Marissa remembered that night vividly. It was after they moved in together, they were both high and craving chili cheese fries so while they were waiting in the café Alex randomly grabbed a napkin and drew it.

Marissa let out a really long breath and hoped that Alex wouldn't be mad at her for showing up out of the blue. Assuming she could find her.

After getting as much cash as she could from her credit cards before Julie cancelled them, Marissa went to Alex's old apartment complex which consequently was Trey's old apartment complex, which brought up a whole new range of emotions Marissa wasn't ready for. She didn't want to think about what Trey did…or almost did.

Marissa shook herself out of the bad memories and remembered she was looking for Alex. Marissa saw the truck she tried to avoid while she was living at the complex and knew the landlord was there.

She got out of her car and walked the short distance to his office where the light was still on. She raised her hand and knocked lightly. His booming voice came back, "C'min."

The door knock felt like it may fall off if Marissa turned it too hard so she delicately turned it and pushed the door opened.

Immediately his eyes were on her. He sat being a metal desk so old it could be considered antique had it not been in such bad shape. There were papers all over the desk, some on from floor in front of it from behind pushed so far back there was no more desk to support it. The computer could probably be an antique too.

"Uh, I was looking for the girl who used to live in apartment A. Purple streak," Marissa pointed to her hair, "Tattoo."

The man's keen eyes studied Marissa for a moment before nodded, "You lived with her?"

Marissa nodded, "Do you have like a forwarding address or something for her? A phone number? It's really important."

The man breathed a labored breath and nodded, "Matter of fact, she left some things in the closet and I was going to send them to her." He turned in his chair and looked at a small cardboard box in the corner with an address written in black marker on the side. "Never got around to it. You going to see her?"

Marissa nodded.

He slowly hefted the box and set it on the corner of his desk causing more papers to fall. Marissa reached for a box, but the man put has large rather hairy arm on it. His 'I heart NASCAR' tattoo was peeking out from under his short sleeve.

"Why don't you know where she lives?" he asked slowly, "If you're going to see her you must be friends so why don't you know?"

Marissa thought quickly and used her refined skill of lying, "I dropped my phone and it broke. Her number was in my phone and she doesn't know my new one."

He looked her over again and nodded, "Okay." He took his arm off the box.

Marissa picked it up and walked to the door, "Thanks."

"Yeah," he called back, his attention already on his paperwork.

Marissa looked in the box and saw it was mostly odds and ends Alex wouldn't miss. But it's a good excuse to see her. Or at least a decent excuse….no it's not. Not even a halfway decent reason.

The box of Alex's possessions took up residence in Marissa's passenger seat joining the scrapbook and bottle of vodka. Her purse slid into the floor a while ago when she had to stop at a light that she swore turned from green straight to red.

Marissa looked over at the address and didn't recognize it. She grabbed her phone from the cup holder next to her and put the address into the built in GPS. A map immediately came up. Alex's new place wasn't close, but it wasn't that far. Maybe a thirty minute drive. It would give her time to think of what to say to her.

Marissa smiled at the map. Alex finally got her place right on the beach. She talked about it all the time when they were together. "I'll never have to burn my feet on pavement ever again." were her exact words. It happened every time Alex went surfing and had to cross the street from their apartment to the beach.

The drive to Alex's house was gruelingly silent. Even with music, it seemed silent because the thoughts in Marissa's head were so loud. She reached over and grabbed the bottle of vodka. After a long drink she screwed the cap on.

She liked how it burned on the way down. The pain felt good. It was ironic that the alcohol had hurt her in more ways that one. Not only had it hurt her throat, but it seemingly destroyed the only life she'd ever known, but it was her escaped. For the few minutes or hours the alcohol was in her bloodstream she was free. No one could bring her down. She didn't have to think about what she was going to wear the next day to fit in or how to do her hair or the history report she'd put off. None of mattered. No social pressures. No family pressures. No school pressures. No relationship pressures. They didn't matter.

Before she knew it the blue dot on her phone representing her location was within a mile of Alex's house. It was hard to see the houses in the mess of palm trees and other plants, but when she neared where Alex's was supposed to be the houses started spacing out and got more colorful as she went. The cars outside were as diverse at the was the houses were built. Nothing looked the same like it did in Newport where everyone's house was huge and tan with a four car garage and a pool.

Her phone beeped to let her know to stop. She crept to a stop in front of a long driveway and saw Alex's Jeep parked outside a carport that housed a white convertible in one side and four or five surfboards in the other.

The house was light blue with white accents. The house was lifted a foot off the ground by and the space from the ground to the bottom of the house was covered by a white, wooden grate. At one end of the house there was a circular room with four wide floor to ceiling windows and surrounded by a porch. The circular room was connected to a large rectangle with two windows looking out on the side Marissa could see. One window was covered by blinds while the other was half covered in a green sheet.

It seemed like every light in the small house was on, but Marissa didn't see any movement inside. She finally put her car in park and cut the engine.

Okay. I can do this. It's just Alex. Marissa said in her head. She counted to three in her head and go out of her car. She thought the momentum of getting out of her car would carry her all the way to her door.

Her footsteps on the gravel driveway echoed in her ears because they were the only sound that could be heard. After an eternity of walking, she finally reached the front porch. Marissa carefully climbed the two steps to the top and walked the four steps to the front door.

Marissa stood there staring at the white, wooden door for a good five minutes in a silent showdown. Marissa was determined to win, but she couldn't bring her hand up and knock.

"Okay," Marissa whispered to herself, "One," she took a deep breath, "Two," another deep breath, "Three." As quickly as she could she lightly knocked on the door three times.

Marissa turned away from the door and took two steps away. Then she turned back around and took two steps back. Then she wrapped her arms around herself.

A sudden panic took her over and she fought the urge to run when she heard the locks clicked back.

When the door opened, it wasn't Alex. It was a woman about Alex's age with layered, shoulder length, dark brown hair. She was a few inches shorter than Alex and she was wearing a dark blue cami that showed sun tanned shoulders and arms and black yoga pants that showed toned legs, Marissa guess from surfing.

A slow smile spread across the woman's face. "You're looking for Alex?"

Marissa raised an eyebrow and nodded, "How did you know?"

"I've…heard of you," she stepped away from the door, "C'min." She turned around toward the circular room, "Alex! It's for you."

"I'm not moving," came Alex's voice, "If it's Max tell him to go away."

"It's definitely not Max," the woman shook her head.

Marissa timidly stepped in and the door was closed behind her. Marissa took a deep breath before stepping into the room and almost surely into Alex's view. The house smelled like a mixture of vanilla candles, salt water, and the unmistakable smell of Alex's perfume which was sweet and lightly fruity.

Marissa was finding it increasingly difficult to move, but the woman walked toward the room where Alex was, her bare feet barely making a noise on the hard wood floor. She disappeared into the room leaving Marissa to panic by herself.

"It's who?!" Alex's voice carried around the short wall the separated the door from the circular room.

Marissa took that as her cue to round the corner and make herself known. She immediately saw Alex sit up from her laying position on a massive horse shoe shaped, sectional couch that took up most of the room. There were many different colored blankets, throws, and pillows all over the couch that looked worn, but very inviting. In the middle of the room was a wooden coffee table with two mugs on it and on the wall opposite the couch a TV hung on the wall. Past the couch were the floor to ceiling windows that overlooked the beach. There was a hammock on the porch behind the house and twinkle lights were wrapped around part of the railing. Behind the couch was a small kitchen area that had obviously been redone recently was where the woman that opened the door was standing.

Marissa looked at her feet before looked at Alex without raising her head. Alex's eyes were set on her, thoroughly studying her. She noticed Alex was clad in a muscle shirt and red shorts with white stripes. Marissa looked back at her feet. "I…uh…I'm sorry for just…showing up."

Alex knew the second she saw Marissa that something was up. She saw the redness and slight puffiness under Marissa's eyes and knew she'd been crying. If she was just showing up to say hi she wouldn't look so nervous.

Alex was waiting for Marissa to continue.

"I…my mom…" Tears gathered in Marissa's eyes. She blinked them away because she didn't want Alex to see her. Marissa knew she was on the edge of breaking down, but she just walked in, "She kicked me out."

"You can…um…stay here," Alex said quickly and quietly. Then she took one last look at Marissa, stood up, and walked out the back door.

Marissa's eyes drifted over to the woman that let her in.

"I'll show you the guest room," she told Marissa, "You'll have to excuse Alex. She's had a long day. I'm Serena by the way."

Alex laid back in the hammock and looked out at the ocean. How did she find me? Why did she come to me? Probably because she knows I'll do whatever she wants. No. I won't. Not anymore. I'm over her. Alex let out a cold, ironic laugh. Yeah right. But I can't get over her if she's here. But I can't kick her out….She must have come to me because I know what it's like. To be abandoned. Alex swallowed hard and tried to focus on the waves.

Bare footsteps neared the door to the outside and Alex heard it slid open. She glanced over and saw Serena leaning in the doorway. "You okay?"

Alex sat up in the hammock, "Yeah…I guess."

"She's in the spare bedroom," Serena added, "You know if you wanted to talk to her."

"No," Alex shook her head, "That's not what I need right now. I have to go to work tomorrow."

Serena nodded, "Okay. Well I'm going to watch a movie if you'd like to join me."

"Which one?" Alex asked getting out of the hammock and following Serena inside.

"My favorite of course," Serena smiled, hopping over the back of the couch.

"Really?" Alex whined walking around the couch and falling backwards, "It's a great movie, but we watch it all the time."

"You can pick tomorrow," Serena told her and grabbed the DVD from under the coffee table. She glanced at the back cover of La Vie En Rose before taking the disk out and putting it in the player.

Marissa quietly laid in the full sized bed with mismatched sheets Serena had put on while she hat gotten her purse and a bag from her car. Serena left a blanket at the end of the bed and told Marissa she was welcome to open the window because the ocean breeze was great at night. Marissa could hear the movie playing in the living room. She didn't want to leave the her room because she didn't want Alex to be uncomfortable and she remembered the last words Serena said before she left. Give her time. She decided that's what she was going to do. She was going to stay out of Alex's way as much as possible and talk as little as necessary.

Marissa closed her eyes in hopes of getting some sleep and fell asleep to the vocals of Edith Piaf.