Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS

A/N: I recently watched NCIS from beginning till end well until Ziva's departure that is, the show had been going downhill for a long time before that in my opinion and that was the final nail in the coffin for me. Her departure and the show in general left me feeling like a lot was left unsaid and unresolved between characters which I hate but as a writer it gave me lots of inspiration. So this story is basically my way of giving the cannon story an ending I'm satisfied with by resolving things and giving Tony and Ziva the happy ending they deserve after the shit they went through in their lives.

So basically this story is about Ziva returning to live in America some time after her leaving and she tries to resolve and fix things between her and tony. Also latter half of the show Ziva is #notmyZiva

Not A Fish.

"Rule #5 bishop." Tony said as they rode elevator up after another successful case.

"Don't waste good?"

"No, that's Gibbs's rule 5, I'm talking about mine."

"Enlighten me Tony," she said humouring him.

"It's always the wife," He said grinning "and once again DiNozzo rule #5 strikes true."

"Really Tony you had to go there? "Ellie asked.

But Tony didn't answer he seemed totally frozen In time and space, his breathing troubled as in front of him stood a ghost someone he never thought he'd see again.

"Tony," she spoke softly to him it seemed to strike him into action but to everyone's surprise he ran away from her, from the elevator down the stairs.

"I'm sorry he's… "Elie didn't know what to say to explain his behaviour to the woman, she was beautiful exotic with sun-kissed skin and long curly brown hair. Ellie rushed after him and she found him at the bottom, his breathing hard as if he had just ran a marathon.

"Tony who was that? Are you okay? "she asked him concerned.

"Just tell her I'll call her and we'll talk when I'm ready, text me her number please Ellie." He asked between ragged breaths then he composed himself and walked out.


It was late when Ziva was finally called by Tony, she had been waiting ever since her meeting with the rest of the team, Tim had been mad but non confrontational as always, he had already forgiven her, ducky had been as understanding as ever, jimmy had simply told her that he was glad she was back and that she should talk with Tony, Abby had been mad really mad, she had been hugged slapped and then hugged again and Gibbs had just welcomed her home. Ever since then she had sat next to her phone in the hotel dread and excitement mixing as she waited patiently for the phone call.

"Hey Zee, can you come over to my place I think I'm ready to talk."

Ziva hailed a cab and was soon in front of the apartment even if she had only been there once it the way there was engrained in her, she softly knocked and waited.

"Hey Ziva, come in you're looking good."

"Thanks Tony," she said warmly smiling as she walked in she kissed his cheek to defuse some tension before handing him her jacket and saying hi to Kate and whoever the other fish was, as she made her way to the couch.

"I'm sorry about my reaction earlier, it was just so sudden so much and I had to think about what I'd say." He said once he'd joined her on the couch.

"It's okay Tony I understand suddenly I'm back in your life of course you would want to speak with your girlfriend first."

"Girlfriend? "He asked perplexed.

"The woman you were having coffee with."

"You were following me? "He asked with a smile, "same old same old."

"Sorry, I just wanted to see if you were alright."

"You really didn't recognize her?" He asked.

Ziva just shook her head.

"That wasn't my girlfriend Ziva that was my therapist Rachel, Kate's sister remember?"

"You have a therapist? " She asked frowning "that's not really like you Tony."

"A lot has changed the last few years." He said the underhanded jab very clear to her.

"So what do you talk about? "She inquired.

"Oh I found out I have a slew of problems: I haven't properly mourned the loss of my mother which happened over 30 years ago, I am romantically dysfunctional, I have a hero complex that get's me into trouble, oh and yeah the severe abandonment issues."

The last part hit her like a ton of bricks. "Oh Tony "she sighed "I'm so sorry."

"Don't be it's a problem I have, not you, Rachel says I just need to be able to enjoy things as long as they last and to be able to let go or I will never allow myself to live, you're in no way beholden to me Ziva."

"I'm just sorry I hurt you Tony."

"Well what's done is done."

"Is it? "she asked angst and hope mixing in her voice.

"I'm still working on it, I've taken a page out of your book and I'm trying to find myself, I joined a men's help group, I work out more and eat healthier, I talk with Rachel about it, I got another fish "he gestured to the aquarium which contained two goldfish. "I'll get over you eventually."

Fear gripped her heart, he was trying to burry her she was almost death to him, no wonder her appearance had shaken him so much. "Do you want to? "She asked.

"It's what you wanted isn't it? "He said, I'll try but I don't think I'll be able to even if I'm 90 years old with hernia and someone tells me you need me I'll be on the next flight to Tel Aviv to get my heart broken again when you chose another spy boyfriend over me so you can get hurt again, after I save you of course "He joked, "that hero complex has to be useful for someone."

"Tony I'm so sorry," She said her heart breaking for him.

"Why? You didn't decide I should fall in love with you."

"Damn it Tony" she said angrily, "why can't you just be mad at me yell or hit me whatever you need to do."

"I'm not mad, as far as I'm concerned Ziva's a fish" Tony said as if that was a normal sentence, "the old Ziva was the one who said I was so loved, she was the one I fell in love with, the one who broke my heart and sent me on my way because I was too tied to the old Ziva and she wanted to be the new Ziva and as far as I'm concerned the new Ziva is an ex-girlfriend in Israel who dumped me and moved on."

" Ziva's a fish "he stated as if it made perfect sense.

"So that's all I am to you now? An ex-girlfriend?"

"If you are the new Ziva she wanted to be then yes, old Ziva told me to forget about her find happiness somewhere else and I'm trying to do that."

"That does not make any sense Tony."

"Exactly what I thought when the old Ziva explained to me why she needed to become new Ziva and why I couldn't be involved in that process."

" Tony it's…"

"Complicated, I know! everything between us always was, you know what's not complicated? He asked raising his voice, " Ziva! she's a fish and I talk to her and I remember all the things I loved about her: the messing up of American idioms, the long curly hair, the teasing, the flirting, everything."

"I'm not dead Tony! you don't need to burry me."

"Oh really? for an alive person the Ziva I loved, the one I was ready to die for every day of the week, the one I went to the ends of the world and back twice wasn't around in any capacity, no phone calls or e-mails, no messages almost like she's dead."

"I'm back Tony."

"I don't know what that means, I don't know who you are, I don't know what I am to you."

"It means I'm back in America back in D.C. and that I changed for the better but I'm still your Ziva Tony, I'm not a fish, I'm the one that teased you, the one who threatened to kill you with paperclips, the one who told you she was fine when you knew she wasn't, the one who broke your heart when you told her she was not alone, I'm still alive Tony!" She shouted, "and I'm not a fish."

"And what am I to you?"

"Someone who's very loved."

"What does that mean?" He asked looking doubtful.

She didn't answer with words but by kissing him hard cupping his cheek.

They both were panting hard when they disengaged, "I hope that's not another goodbye kiss "Tony said with ragged breath.

"I was hoping it was more of a welcome home one."

"Guess I'll have to rename my fish. "He said before claiming her lips again and pushing her back against the couch.

The end

A/N: If you like this type of story in which Ziva returns and I try to give the cannon an in my opinion satisfying ending for our favourite duo then you'll be happy to know that I've already written 3 other such stories which I'll upload in the future. This one was a bit weird and the weakest of the 4 I've written.