I knew he didn't love me. I had known. He always denied his feelings for her, Saying she was in the past. But I could tell how he always lingered when around her. I knew he only married me to keep balance to the nation. He said it was because of love not balance, But I knew he was lying. He loved her, and she loved him. But so did I. When we had sex for the first time on our wedding night I knew he was thinking of her, wishing it was her not me. Whenever I kissed him I could feel him holding back because he felt like he was betraying her, Because he loved her. Not Me. I hated Her. I hated her because she loved him, but I hated her even more because he loved her back. They both said that it was something of the past but their eyes gave them away. The sadness and pure agony in their eyes let me know that they were lying. I hated him for constantly lying to me, I hated him, but I loved him...even though he didn't love me. I hated that she was more beautiful then me. Higher then me. Better for Zuko then me...It was like she knew when he was hurt or angry. Just like he knew when she was sad or tired. She knew how to calm him down when I couldn't...I just ended up always making him more angry. Him just seeing me made him angry. It made him angry because seeing me was a constant reminder that he couldn't have her. Hearing me speak was another constant reminder that I couldn't Act, Look, or be her. He tried to never show it because he knew it wasn't my fault, but I could tell that he hated me. It hurts to know that I'm constantly hurting him...To know that I'll never be good enough, or perfect enough because I'm not her. Because I'm not Katara. I'm just Mai...
