Ai no Uta

By Lily Maxwell


I fall.

I can feel my whole body burning with power, and in the distance, I can hear the shouts of my comrades.

Only one screams my name.

I feel the ghost of a touch as someone picks my body up. I try to yell, try to move, but my body doesn't obey. The body is no longer under my command.

The enemies around us have been defeated. The purpose has been fulfilled, so why? Why doesn't he go away? Why can't I pull him out of my body, out of my conscience, out of my mind?

I struggle within myself. I don't want him to be out. I don't know if my physical appearance has changed. I'm unaware of my surroundings. He won't let me go back. It's like being underwater. I can only see faint and distorted images, hear vague sounds, feel light touches while the rest of me submerges in the cold.

It's cold now.

I no longer know where I am. I keep hearing a familiar voice, trying to talk to me, trying to reassure me, calling my name. I want to answer, but I can't. I keep being pushed away from a body that is rightfully mine.

This is my life. Although I understand how I was born to be King, he has no right to keep me from living. I've lived most of my life unaware of his presence, and it is not now, definitely not at this moment that I'm going to surrender.

He scares me.

The amount of power and the intensity of his feelings, of his thoughts. I'd rather live an ordinary life than give in when the time for his powers come. He's righteous, I'll give him that. After all, he is me. But there are times that I wonder. I wonder if I wouldn't be able to do things my way, instead of his?

I start to become afraid.

He's the King. He's the one that people expect when they hear about the Great Demon King, who surpasses Shinou himself. He knows his priorities, he knows what he wants. He's confident, the possessor of justice. What can I do?

I can hear everyone trying to talk to me.

I think someone, at one point, touches my hand. Brushes my bangs away. I think I can hear a tiny, broken voice crying.

I think I can hear someone singing.

Some of them call me by my name. It's comforting, for whenever someone mentions my title, I think of him, and I wonder if it helps him while he tries to take over. But one voice calls my name with such emotion that I start to think that I can win.

I'm starting to become desperate.

I pound and pound against myself. I yell, and even though no one can hear me, I continue to yell. At this point, I was supposed to be out of breath, but since I'm in my own mind, my own heart, it doesn't happen.

I can feel him backing away. By now, he's an open book to me. A powerful, dangerous, unpredictable book. I'm not strong enough to push him away, but if I keep trying, I will overcome him. I need to become a stronger, more confident person so I can rule my kingdom the way it deserves to be ruled. All of those who came to me and tried to call me back, they deserve a good king.

I can feel my eyes opening.

The first thing I notice are the raindrops. Even though I'm fully awake now, their sound is still faint and soft against the window. It mustn't be raining hard. My head is still heavy and my body is weak. The strength I needed to take over must have exhausted not only my mind, but my body as well. I sit up.

A voice calls my name.

He was looking through the window, and now approaches me quickly. He looks sad. It's weird seeing him sad. The look just doesn't belong on his features. He usually gets gloomy when it rains, it's true. The comebacks aren't as vehement, the dirty looks, the cheating accusations aren't as strong. He looks like a little kid who can't play outside because of the rain.

But now I see his eyes are puffy and red. His clothes aren't as neat as they are supposed to be. His hair isn't as shiny as it should, even in the dim light. When he touches my face, his skin isn't as warm.

He calls my name again. I'm too tired to speak, so I nod. He starts to cry against my chest. I've never heard such a wrong, painful sound before. It was like I had come back to a totally different world. He wasn't beating me up or cursing me. He just embraced me and told me he was scared.

He is scaring me.

I try to soothe him, the same way he soothed me. I hold on to him, not having any other care in the world. It was his voice who kept calling me, his touch who helped me want to come back. I believe it was his voice that sang a beautiful, sad song. And now he's breaking down in front of me, and that is not right. I want to make things right.

I can feel him becoming warm again. The crying didn't last for long and now he just stays there, hugging me, his arms around my middle, and my arms around his shoulders. I can't tell what he's thinking, but I'm glad he stopped crying. His breathing is steady again. My fingers run through his hair without me even acknowledging it. It just seemed the right thing to do.

And then he calls my name again. His tone makes me happy.

I don't want to sleep, a part of me fearing that I wouldn't wake up again. But then I remember that he would never let me go. He would keep calling my name, without me even asking him to. That's just how he is.

And I wouldn't wish for it to be any different.


Inspiration came from the ending song from the KKM PS2 game Shin Makoku no Kyuujitsu, and the Angela Aki song from which came the title of the story. It means "Love Song". I just couldn't bring myself to give it an English title. If you listen to the song, I believe you might agree.

I'm aware there's lot of OOC-ness here, so please bear with me. I tried my best to make it believable. It's just hard to make a serious story from Yuuri's POV. So I tried.