….Now I can see the Moon

Barn's burnt down --
now I can see the moon

-Mizuta Masahide

A gutter may not be the best place to wake up from ah.......ahhh, huh as I give my surroundings a good look about. "Excuse me sir, yo, yeah you." I call to a passerby. " What's today? Tuesday? Thank you", 3 day bender but it did give one a lovely perspective of a full moon. All big and shiny up there in the night sky.

Wonder what happened in those three day? Whatever it was, I definitely got rolled, the money I'd won at poker....ma jong......uhhhhhh...whatever is long gone. Yup, nothing in the the pockets, not even a bus token. Shit! Even the couple of bucks in the lining of my head band is among the missing. So much for 'joy.'

Sigh, wonder how long I've been laying in a gutter? Huh, did I pee myself or is that just the water flowing by? Must be both cuz I stink like a rice paddy. Got to sooooo get myself hosed off somewhere before even setting foot in a bath house. Gods, what a headache! Must have been the cheap booze, that off brand shit will kill yah every time. Blah, my tongue tastes like a ho house welcome mat on BOGO* night Damn that cheap crap. Maybe I'll just go home to bathe, save the deep soak for later.

Sitting up, the world kind of shifts a bit and I go on Mr Toads Wild Ride for a couple of minutes while the dry heaves come and go. Huh, last thing I remember was enacting the 8th plague of the Moses story, authentically done I might add in the missionary position, did I ever mention how much I love them bouncy little locusts? So anywho, me and the locusts were at the peak of our performance for this hot little honey from the Inn of the.....Sixth or Seventh Happiness? Forget which of the Happiness bars it was, one through seven are all lined up on the same block, when.......when I wake up in this gutter three days later on a Tuesday night. "Excuse me Miss?" A woman and her overfed Pekingese were ambling by. " No, I am not drunk madam, I'm hung over, there IS a difference. All I want is the time, you're perfectly safe as I am now sober and you're so butt fuck'en ugly that I'd have to get drunk ten times over to even think of having sex with you, ya two bagger**. Ten o'clock, thank you, now please go eat shit and die! Yeah, well same to you and twice on Sunday!"

Wobbling to my feet, I stepped up out of the gutter, whewwwwwwwww, stinky! Knock a buzzard off a shit wagon at 50 paces kinda stinky. Soooooooooo, need to get home! Stumbling down the street, making a few false fits and starts before heading off in the correct direction of my house. Sigh, the rent is due tomorrow, today..uh yesterday? Crud, I just gotta get some bread to Old Lady Zao before she sets her slicky boys on me. Usually I'm three steps ahead of those fuckers but right now having enough trouble putting one step in front of the other.

The moon light that had shone so brightly up until now was being doused by a line of clouds that were being blown in, making the air quick and juicy. Looks like somebody fired up the candles and incense for Yinglong*** or Shenlong**** to do their thing. Some swear by the Merciful Goddess to call up a storm, but for me, the little weather cutie on Channel two can rain on my parade any day of the week.

A cold wet drop struck my cheek, followed by a few others and finally just sheet after sheet of stinging little bb's pelted my body. Rain, okay, can deal with rain. At least will get some of the shit off by the time home. Which in short order saw the outline of my little abode in the woods. Sitting down on the stoop, I rip off the boots and set them next to the door. A good drenching, some shoe polish and a lot of baking soda will get the stink out. The shirt, pants and socks come off next and them I just plain toss out into the yard, don't even wanna see those nasty things ever again. So now all I have on is a smile and a load of goose bumps. Slide a hand down to make sure the goods are still where they should be. Yup, still there in correct number. A little sore but a marathon of 'missionary work' will do that to a fella. Nothing some hot water and a rest up won't cure.

Dick check complete I unlock the door (keep my house key hidden under a porch floor board ) and come in from out the wet. See, I do have enough sense to come in out of the rain.

Flicked on the light and almost turned it right back off. The dick and balls might be in the correct place but they're surrounded by a hideous sponging of black, blue and purple that went half way down my thighs and up past my navel. Gods what happened? My face....my fingers flew up to inspect tender cheek bones and a sore puffy eye, do I even wanna look in the mirror?

My arms and legs are covered in scratches and there is a nasty cut on the right shin. Think a stop at the free clinic tomorrow for tetanus, typhoid, penicillin shots and whatever else they got to get rid of whatever I may got is definatly in order. But for the moment, shower, now!

The water ran hot for twenty minutes before turning lukewarm and another ten before the cold water was running down my back. Each cut stung when touched by the soap and my scalp became painfully alive with each scrub through knocking out dirt, crud, bugs, blood and gods only knows what else.

And then I was clean, but tired, right down to the bone and with a comforing glance about the house....yeah... l was going to be okay. Checking the refridgerator, there where two lonely beers next to the science project that had once been take out chicken and rice. The first beer went down in three gulps and that sucker was a 40***** too. The next beer I savored a sip at at time, tasting the barley, hops,and rice. Letting the alcohol deaden my aches and lighten my heart. Yeah, a little nip of the dog that beat the crap out of me.

Sliding into bed, the sheets were cooling, comforting and providing a nice haven. At least tomarrow I'll know where I'm waking up. In the mean time, the rain had stopped and had moved off, the moon light shining in with soft light.

"I need something different" I said drowsily out loud. "Need a change of luck...enough to win me some rent money. Maybe even meet someone different. Someone........new. I wish...." and sleep took me away.

And being the snarky bitch she was, the Merciful Goddess granted it but not in the way, shape or form that anyone could have ever expected.

* Buy One Get One

** Two Bagger: a person so ugly you would have to put two bags on (just in case one bag broke) to have sex with.

***Yinglong: dragon who controls rain and drought

****Shenlong: dragon who controls the wind and rain

***** 40: a bottle of beer that holds 40 ounces